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khadeeja.rehan
10-06-2018, 07:20 AM
Apparently the uni i applied to thats here in jubail,saudi arabia, rejected me just 2 days before classes. And thats not even the worst part. After alot of conversations with friends and family, some who supported my parents to do online university, and some who completed disagreed with my parents. My parents never rly understood the fact that i want to go back to pakistan for university cuz they find it unsafe for a girl and they want me in front of their eyes. I wanted to be an architect and now im forced to do psychology on an online university. tbh at first i didnt rly hate it but as time passes, (its been a month now) im starting to realise how bored i am of this routine. Using the laptop always for studying is rly starting to make me lose interest. I cry everytnight that in sha Allah some miracle happens that i can go to pakistan to study and persue my original dream. My MOM doesnt want me to go to Pakistan due religious issues (its hard to be religious when half the ppl there dont care abt religion much) and its hard to see all my classmates gone to universities and living their dreams while im stuck in saudi arabia doing something i dont even wanna do. Im planning on asking my parents again and breaking the news to them that I hate online university. I can stay home and just study from the laptop. I want to go and make my dreams come true and make new friends. But idk if my mom will understand.
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*charisma*
10-06-2018, 09:20 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by khadeeja.rehan
Apparently the uni i applied to thats here in jubail,saudi arabia, rejected me just 2 days before classes. And thats not even the worst part. After alot of conversations with friends and family, some who supported my parents to do online university, and some who completed disagreed with my parents. My parents never rly understood the fact that i want to go back to pakistan for university cuz they find it unsafe for a girl and they want me in front of their eyes. I wanted to be an architect and now im forced to do psychology on an online university. tbh at first i didnt rly hate it but as time passes, (its been a month now) im starting to realise how bored i am of this routine. Using the laptop always for studying is rly starting to make me lose interest. I cry everytnight that in sha Allah some miracle happens that i can go to pakistan to study and persue my original dream. My MOM doesnt want me to go to Pakistan due religious issues (its hard to be religious when half the ppl there dont care abt religion much) and its hard to see all my classmates gone to universities and living their dreams while im stuck in saudi arabia doing something i dont even wanna do. Im planning on asking my parents again and breaking the news to them that I hate online university. I can stay home and just study from the laptop. I want to go and make my dreams come true and make new friends. But idk if my mom will understand.
You should respect your family's wishes. I don't think anyone is going to agree that going for studies alone in another country away from your family is the smartest idea. If you don't want to do your schooling online, then apply to a different school in your city/nearby or figure out a way to get into the school you want. There's no reason to take drastic measures and compare your life to other people.
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khadeeja.rehan
10-06-2018, 10:16 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma*
You should respect your family's wishes. I don't think anyone is going to agree that going for studies alone in another country away from your family is the smartest idea. If you don't want to do your schooling online, then apply to a different school in your city/nearby or figure out a way to get into the school you want. There's no reason to take drastic measures and compare your life to other people.
yes i know i have to respect my parents decisions and that they r just looking out for us, but at the same time i wont always stay in their control. i dont wanna find out in the future that i cant do certain things just becz I always had my parents around and i was never put in a situation before. In saudi arabia all the universities i know are so expensive and there arent much options here either. Whereas in pakistan there are so many options for architecture with good studies. And i know alot of ppl who go to pakistan and come back confident they know how to handle situations. And i know i try my best not to compare myself to others but this is the one thing im not comparing myself to others to, its for my own satisfaction since being an architect is my dream.
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HisServant
10-07-2018, 02:58 AM
:sl:

The objective of a matter ought to be for the sake of Allah and the means (the path taken) must justify the ends.

Ever looked into Psychology and Architecture? If, this is what is really desired. A degree in Psychology is needed. (not Pakistani based but UK)

It can be possible to complete your degree online provided other things are factored in for instance taking breaks to meet up with friends, finding time to visit natural spaces.... Possibly, pursue Islamic studies part-time within Saudi whereby learning with others in real life complements studies online (social-religious interactions) and bring forth blessings. You may also find that various hobbies revolving around a sport/fitness (to give your mind a decent break) will be helpful. If, your parents assist in finding a spouse in another country of your liking, maybe it can help reach both yours and their goal in a way that is possible.

However, everything is in the hands of Allah so make dua and TRUST Him to give what is best. It's in His wisdom that particular rules and guidelines were given to keep us protected, Alhamdulilah! May Allah give you what is best. Ameen.
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khadeeja.rehan
10-07-2018, 10:04 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Nuri
:sl:

The objective of a matter ought to be for the sake of Allah and the means (the path taken) must justify the ends.

Ever looked into Psychology and Architecture? If, this is what is really desired. A degree in Psychology is needed. (not Pakistani based but UK)

It can be possible to complete your degree online provided other things are factored in for instance taking breaks to meet up with friends, finding time to visit natural spaces.... Possibly, pursue Islamic studies part-time within Saudi whereby learning with others in real life complements studies online (social-religious interactions) and bring forth blessings. You may also find that various hobbies revolving around a sport/fitness (to give your mind a decent break) will be helpful. If, your parents assist in finding a spouse in another country of your liking, maybe it can help reach both yours and their goal in a way that is possible.

However, everything is in the hands of Allah so make dua and TRUST Him to give what is best. It's in His wisdom that particular rules and guidelines were given to keep us protected, Alhamdulilah! May Allah give you what is best. Ameen.
thank u, this actually helped. Im still gonna try talking to my parents first cuz thats all what my friends are suggesting. Theyre saying atleast take action first, then see what Allah does.
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Mandy
10-07-2018, 12:24 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by khadeeja.rehan
My MOM doesnt want me to go to Pakistan due religious issues (its hard to be religious when half the ppl there dont care abt religion much) and its hard to see all my classmates gone to universities and living their dreams while im stuck in saudi arabia doing something i dont even wanna do. Im planning on asking my parents again and breaking the news to them that I hate online university. I can stay home and just study from the laptop. I want to go and make my dreams come true and make new friends. But idk if my mom will understand.
I am sorry that you do not like your classes so far. Maybe you should give it a bit more time? As Nuri suggested, do take breaks between study sessions, go outside with your friends and relax. It is not because you study online that you need to be all the time in front of your laptop.

I can understand why your parents are not very open to the idea of sending you alone in another country. Do you have any family over there or know anyone there? How would you manage alone? I know it might look unfair and you may believe that you would manage all on your own. I do not want to sound like an old grumpy lady by saying this, but being alone in a different country would be even harder for a young woman than studying online. There are so many challenges and potential problems that you have not yet imagined. I know I will say something you probably do not want to hear right now, but you should trust your parents. They know what is best for their daughter.


You mention your mothers opinion a lot, but what does your father think of all this?
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HisServant
10-11-2018, 11:42 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by khadeeja.rehan
thank u, this actually helped. Im still gonna try talking to my parents first cuz thats all what my friends are suggesting. Theyre saying atleast take action first, then see what Allah does.
Do you really dislike Psychology that much or moreso the fact that you have to study online? :)There are some tips provided here about online safety and health concerns-protections. Pay particular attention to social media with regards to disclosing unnecessary personal information. If left unprotected, online can become an even dangerous grounds luring into real world kidnapping, human trafficking etc. So, please stay guarded online, irregardless at how friendly or even religious someone can be. (Block off your camera and deactivate microphone when online-and not in use & proper hijab when in use). Read this: All The Ways Your SmartPhone And Apps Can Track You. (deselect the appropriate permissions)

9 Tips to cutdown on computer radiation


If parents have already (fully) paid for a degree there will be much blessings gained to make sincere attempts to complete the study. Psychology doesn't have to be boring at all!

Recent articles of interest in Psychology
https://www.psychforums.com/
Psychology and Islam

Nevertheless, I truly hope you and your parents both resolve this manner in a satisfactory and Islamic manner. Best wishes,

- - - Updated - - -

format_quote Originally Posted by Mandy
I am sorry that you do not like your classes so far. Maybe you should give it a bit more time? As Nuri suggested, do take breaks between study sessions, go outside with your friends and relax. It is not because you study online that you need to be all the time in front of your laptop.

I can understand why your parents are not very open to the idea of sending you alone in another country. Do you have any family over there or know anyone there? How would you manage alone? I know it might look unfair and you may believe that you would manage all on your own. I do not want to sound like an old grumpy lady by saying this, but being alone in a different country would be even harder for a young woman than studying online. There are so many challenges and potential problems that you have not yet imagined. I know I will say something you probably do not want to hear right now, but you should trust your parents. They know what is best for their daughter.


You mention your mothers opinion a lot, but what does your father think of all this?
Yes, using books and studying at the library can be another way.
Being in another country alone, with friends-who may or may not have one's best interest at heart, can be a huge risk. Stay safe! (don't be influenced by glamour over safety)
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