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Studentofdeed
08-20-2019, 12:18 AM
I have been doing some good deeds but I realise that when I help these people out, dont get me wrong they are good people but i realise if they were in position to help me they would not. Is It bad to complain of my frustration of this my mother? Or does make my deeds useless? I definitely do not remind people of favors as allah doesnt like it but I tell my mother how the people in mosque take me for granted. I hate go out of the way to help these people and when I ask a favor or something, they reply with attitude or give me maybe. I complain to my mother about this, will Allah still be happy about my efforts or did I completely lose the effort of my deeds. This really makes me frustrated that all my work I put in is lost. Some people also keep asking me for favors because they know I do not like saying no and emotional blackmail me. It really sucks. I know a good muslim should help others and prophey muhammad saw went all beyond and allah loves those who help others but how do i deal with the frustration of being unappreciated. I really dont care what these people think of me. I only care what allah thinks of me but I'm scared I might I have ruined my good deeds because I was complaining to my mother
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Iceee
08-20-2019, 12:47 AM
Salaam brother,

Here's one of my favourite hadith's which fits directly into your situation:

A man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: "O Messenger of Allaah, I have relatives with whom I try to keep in touch, but they cut me off; I treat them well, but they treat me badly; I try to be kind to them, but they are cruel to me." He said: "If you are as you say, it is as if you are putting hot ashes in their mouths. You will continue to have support from Allaah against them so long as you continue doing that." (Reported by Muslim, no. 2558)

So brother, your deeds are not useless. Your deeds are seen by Allah Subhanahuwatallah and Inshallah you will be rewarded in the hereafter for the deeds you have done and continue to do in your daily life. Tell your mother about your frustrations, or else your emotions will eat up inside of you. Your mother loves you more than any other human and she won't mind. Do help others with deeds, but if it affects your mental or physical health, it is best to focus on yourself and/or seek medical help for the time being. We are human and we all have emotions, Inshallah your emotions doesn't affect you negatively.

You may find it best to ask an Imam/
Scholar/Sheikh about your issues as they will have more knowledge.

Allah knows best.
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Studentofdeed
08-20-2019, 04:25 AM
Jazakallah khayran...people make dua for me. May allah bless you
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Eric H
08-20-2019, 07:59 AM
Greetings and peace be with you Studentofdeed;

These are a couple of quotes that inspire me............

Jackson Kiddard quotes
“Anything that annoys you is for teaching you patience.
Anyone who abandons you is for
teaching you how to stand up
on your own two feet.
Anything that angers you is for teaching you forgiveness and compassion.
Anything that has power over you is for teaching you how to take your power back.
Anything you hate is for
teaching you unconditional love.
Anything you fear is for
teaching you courage to
overcome your fear.
Anything you can’t control is for teaching you how to let go and trust in Allah.


Anyway
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and Allah;
It never was between you and them anyway.

May Allah bless you through all your struggles,

Eric
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Studentofdeed
08-20-2019, 11:55 AM
I understand where you are all coming from. I have been very compassionate and forgiving. When I was young I used to fight all the time with all the kids who used to tease and harass me. I always got into trouble in school simply because I stood up for myself. Now only for the sake o allah I'm the only fool who is literally trying all I can to please Allah. So many times I had the opportunities for revenge but I forgave. So many opportunities I was right in the argument but I left for it for allah. These people call themselves muslims but harm me constantly. I hate muslims now because they dont even follow islam. My mother wants me to marry a nonmuslim woman because they dont lie or cheat. A guy blackmailed me and accused me of being horrible muslim yet I still forgave him. That same guy prays every salah in the mosque. A muslim in school used to swear and call me names even though I used to tutor him and helped him get in A in the class. One time I asked a favor and he been not taking it seriously so I said I wont help you if you cant even do a small thing which was to ask his friends to stop bullying me because I know I will lose my anger if I do it myself. This guy gets angry and stops talking to me. For the sake of allah I went and apologized to the guy and continued tutoring him. I was helping him free. I know I have done mistakes too and not the perfect muslim obviously but I'm literally trying to be good so allah loves me yet sadly these people do not care. As soon as I had my open heart surgery, literally 2 weeks after my surgery I went to the mosque and sat on a chair. Some brother said a really insensitive comment which hurt me saying why is this brother sitting on this chair, he couldn't use a different one? I'm disgusted and I hate muslims and I strongly disliking the mosque now.

- - - Updated - - -

This is why I'm partially losing my mind and struggling with my iman...I'm trying yet people in the mosque continue to oppress and use me. The only time I ever asked allah for help against someone yet sadly the person got away and is laughing at me. I do not what to do...I really feel like maybe allah is nothappy with me because the people of the mosque dislike me
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HabibUrrehman
08-20-2019, 03:02 PM
Originally Posted by Studentofdeed
I understand where you are all coming from. I have been very compassionate and forgiving. When I was young I used to fight all the time with all the kids who used to tease and harass me. I always got into trouble in school simply because I stood up for myself. Now only for the sake o allah I'm the only fool who is literally trying all I can to please Allah. So many times I had the opportunities for revenge but I forgave. So many opportunities I was right in the argument but I left for it for allah. These people call themselves muslims but harm me constantly. I hate muslims now because they dont even follow islam. My mother wants me to marry a nonmuslim woman because they dont lie or cheat. A guy blackmailed me and accused me of being horrible muslim yet I still forgave him. That same guy prays every salah in the mosque. A muslim in school used to swear and call me names even though I used to tutor him and helped him get in A in the class. One time I asked a favor and he been not taking it seriously so I said I wont help you if you cant even do a small thing which was to ask his friends to stop bullying me because I know I will lose my anger if I do it myself. This guy gets angry and stops talking to me. For the sake of allah I went and apologized to the guy and continued tutoring him. I was helping him free. I know I have done mistakes too and not the perfect muslim obviously but I'm literally trying to be good so allah loves me yet sadly these people do not care. As soon as I had my open heart surgery, literally 2 weeks after my surgery I went to the mosque and sat on a chair. Some brother said a really insensitive comment which hurt me saying why is this brother sitting on this chair, he couldn't use a different one? I'm disgusted and I hate muslims and I strongly disliking the mosque now.

- - - Updated - - -

This is why I'm partially losing my mind and struggling with my iman...I'm trying yet people in the mosque continue to oppress and use me. The only time I ever asked allah for help against someone yet sadly the person got away and is laughing at me. I do not what to do...I really feel like maybe allah is nothappy with me because the people of the mosque dislike me
:sl:

Brother keep doing good things for the sake of Allah and be certain that you will see reward for those in the life hereafter. It does hurt but may be this is your test. Remember that you are not doing this to be respected by people, you are only doing this to please Allah and Allah knows what is best for you. May be its in best for you at this time because it may help you increase in your faith and sincerity. Keep your trust in Allah. Know that He is all knowing and all watching and knows what we don't know. Be patient and know that there will be ease after hardships.

:wa:
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