Assalam o alaikum rahamutullahi barautuhku.
it is grave to think about suicide, Astagfirullah, stay away from that.
Allah says in Quran
O you who have believed, do not consume one another's wealth unjustly but only [in lawful] business by mutual consent.
And do not kill yourselves [or one another]. Indeed, Allah is to you ever Merciful. Surah An Nisa 29 ayat.
and then in next ayat, same surah.
And whoever does that in aggression and injustice - then We will drive him into a Fire. And that, for Allah, is [always] easy.
Suicide is very dangerous sin, Paradise is forbidden for people who are sane and have commited suicide. As for insane or child, Allah knows best.
Prophet peace be upon him said
Narrated Abu Huraira-:
The Prophet ﷺ said, "He who commits suicide by throttling shall keep on throttling himself in the Hell Fire (forever) and he who commits suicide by stabbing himself shall keep on stabbing himself in the Hell-Fire."
Sahih al-Bukhari, 1365
Sahih al-Bukhari, Vol. 2, Book of Funerals (Al-Janaa'iz), Hadith 446
Sahih al-Bukhari, Book of Funerals (Al-Janaa'iz), Hadith 446
This hadith is authentic
On the authority of Jundub ibn Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:
There was amongst those before you a man who had a wound. He was in [such] anguish that he took a knife and made with it a cut in his hand, and the blood did not cease to flow till he died. Allah the Almighty said: My servant has himself forestalled Me; I have forbidden him Paradise. It was related by al-Bukhari. Hadith Qudsi 28th (Sahih)
Life is blessing from Allah. No pious muslims would dare to abuse it by commiting suicide. You should thank Allah, even if you are in difficulties, because He gave you more times to do more good deeds and ask Him for His mercy and forgiveness.. Allah does not put any difficulites beyound our capaitabilites.. There were people who faced more difficulties tests than us, that was prophets.... They were thankful. Read the story of Prophet Ayyub peace be upon him, you will understand the importance of patience.
JazakAllah khair.