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Studentofdeed
11-28-2019, 05:19 AM
I feel extremely lonely...the people in the mosque are so rude and only talk to me when they need something from me otherwise I'm nonexistent. It's so hard not to hate them and keep convincing myself that not all of them are bad. They are extremely materialistic and so in love with the idea of their own race that any member isnt one of them are beneath them. All of them deny racism but I know and can feel not welcome. There are few who are very kind to me, which helps combat that feeling hatred. I feel extremely confused because when they need something, they talk to me and are nice otherwise it's all us against them mentality.
I'm feeling rejected and sad because there were few nonmuslims girls that I felt were into me. Obviously I'm trying to stay away but earlier I said I got a girls phone number but then I said I would give her the quran. I thought that this would be good thing and wanted to respect her and tell her how beautiful islam was. When I told her about islam , she now avoids me. Alhamdullah I'm still grateful for everything Allah has done but...I just dont feel wanted. As long Allah is pleased I'm happy, and I'm not trying to show off, I'm here only because I want input and advice because i dont really have anyone to talk to. Please advise me
Jazakallah khayran
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taha_
11-28-2019, 05:43 AM
Assalam o alaikum rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu

Dont feel lonely. Allah is with you. If you have strong trust in Allah.

Why do you feel lonely in masjid? What is masjid? Place of worshipping Allah not talking place. You make intention to please Allah not people there. If they are still rude. Ignore them and focus on your worship, otherwise your faith will get weakened.. Allah is testing you. He still loves you. Why do you need anyone else. Dont you need your Lord? Yes life without Him is useless and depressed. It does not matter if you live luxurious life with Bugatti, mansion with garden and lake, you will always be depressed without Allah.

It seems that you want to get married? Perhaps you could marry your cousin? Islam doesn't forbid cousin marriage, though you can get blood test before marrying. If you dont want, leave it to Allah. You need sabr you need duas, dont lose hope which disbelievers does, dont despair His mercy which disbelievers does.

Allah guides those whoever He wills, ask Him before trying to guide people to islam..

Read more quran and do more dikhr to erase your loneliness off, ignore the rude people. If it is possible for you. You should try perform tahajudd prayer which is beautiful. Just pray secretly in your house, ask Allah about your problems, keep that prayers secret to you..

Please Allah not them. Whatever good and bad happens is from Allah. There is wisdom behind it, divine decree is basic faith that we muslims believe in. Ask Allah to grant you good company and also righteous woman and then, be patient patient patient.

JazakAllah khair
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Studentofdeed
11-28-2019, 07:46 AM
Jazakallah khayran brother ...but you misunderstood my point. I'm not materialistic or anything. I'm happy with what Allah has given me. I'm just frustrated that I feel rejected everywhere I go. At the mosque, the people there look down at me. It's not like I'm talking to them but these people then come to me asking for help then disappear. They do not even acknowledge my presence in the mosque. All because I'm of a different race. On top of that I understand, marriage is impossible. But there was a nonmuslim girl who seemed nice. I gave her the quran and she said she will definitely check it out but now she avoids me.

My family then do not want me to go to the mosque any more because they notice how the people in the mosque treat me...I want to stop going but my heart is attached. How can I stop going when I love the mosque but the people inside are just users and rude. I'm not depressed...I just feel rejected every where. The only sincere human in my life is mother. Yet she even gets irritated with me because she tells me to stop going to the mosque because people mistreat me ...yet despite that I'm still going.

My father just doesnt care...he is very indifferent. Yes alhamdullah he is better than most fathers and I make duas for him but that is only to please Allah. My father doesnt give a cent and his off enjoying his life abroad with his friends. My mother is working and now when my father comes he treats us all like his slaves and constantly says I'm a disappointment. When I had my open heart surgery, he did not even care and was bored when I was the hospital. He said why should I stay. There is no point of me staying. He was on his laptop the whole time on facebook or calling his friends. He then proceeds to tell everyone on the phone how concerned he is for my health to show this image he is a caring father. He is why I was not religous when I was young.

There is only so much I can tolerate.
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jameelash
11-28-2019, 07:57 AM
May be u r taking masjid people in a,wrong way.if still bad find another masjid to pray.don't be moody. Give salam smilingly..if some doesn't smile that doesn't
mean they r moody.like u every one may have their own problem..try to make friends with them.it will help.
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taha_
11-28-2019, 08:12 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Studentofdeed
.but you misunderstood my point. I'm not materialistic or anything. I'm happy with what Allah has given me
Assalam o Alaikum rahamutullahi barakuthu,

i was not saying that you are materialistic, i'm giving you example of life without Allah,

format_quote Originally Posted by Studentofdeed
My family then do not want me to go to the mosque any more because they notice how the people in the mosque treat me...I want to stop going but my heart is attached. How can I stop going when I love the mosque but the people inside are just users and rude. I'm not depressed...I just feel rejected every where. The only sincere human in my life is mother. Yet she even gets irritated with me because she tells me to stop going to the mosque because people mistreat me ...yet despite that I'm still going.
Allah knows your good intention of going to masjid, respect your mom, because she is worried about you. You can perform prayers at home. Do not disrespect your parents except if ordered to commit sins but don't be harsh. Love your mother, Also seek refuge with Allah against oppressive people, because nothing happens except by His permission.

Prophet Peace be upon him said
Abu Huraira reported: A man asked the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, “Who is most deserving of my good company?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked, “Then who?” The Prophet said “Your mother.” The man asked again, “Then who?” The Prophet said, “Your mother.” The man asked again, “Then who?” The Prophet said, “Your father.”
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 5626, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2548
Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

Mothers has more rights to their children than father, I mean fathers still have rights too aswell.

respect your parents. Allah says in Quran

And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. ( 17:23)

"We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth." (Quran 46:15)


it's unfortunable about your father. Tell him that you and your family have rights over him. Man is leader of a family, he needs to look after them, his wife and children. he needs to protect them from any harmful things ,and feed them... You need to ask Allah to guide him to His straight path, as He guided you to His path Alhamdulillah. Remind him about Day of Judgement which we have to prepare ourselves. but don't be harsh or extremist. instead be patient. Life is test from Allah. As Muslims, it is our duty to take care of our parents.


format_quote Originally Posted by Studentofdeed
But there was a nonmuslim girl who seemed nice. I gave her the quran and she said she will definitely check it out but now she avoids me.
Hmm... Leave her alone, it's upto Allah to guide her to Islam or not, Ask Him to guide her and have mercy on her.
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