Greetings and peace be with you Nusaybah_6; and welcome tot he forum;
format_quote Originally Posted by
Nusaybah_6
My question is; has anyone here faced a situation like this? How did it change?
I admire your attitude towards marriage; pray that Allah will help you to do his will, and pray for your husband that he will also do the will of Allah, pray that Allah will bless you both. When you put things in Allah's hands; it takes patience, resilience, perseverance and that you never give up hope. Allah created each and every one of us to be a kind and caring person; we have to search for that kindness within ourselves and everyone else we meet. Fight all battles with kindness and compassion; your husband may well be a damaged person if he is now on drugs; but he is not beyond help.
Marriage has to be one of the toughest things we do in life, nothing can really prepare us for our own marriage. We look at our parents and others as role models, but our own marriage will throw things at us that we least expect. The first twenty five years of my marriage were the hardest, then it gets tougher, life is a constant battle of events that can just beat you down, or we learn to weather the storms together; I have only been married for thirty four years of turmoil. To this day, I have very little in common with my wife, we approach things in different ways that have often lead to conflict. Now we are gradually understanding that we need each other, we are stronger because of our differences and we can do things better together because we are different.
It is incredibly hard to change ourselves, I am only 70 and still struggling; we have even less hope of changing other people. We may be able to influence them with kindness over many years; but it is more about how we change ourselves.
My only real advice is never to give up hope in Allah, keep praying for yourself and for your husband; pray that Allah will bless you both in your struggles.
Feel free to ignore this post, because when anyone gives advice, they are not the ones who have to live with the consequences.
May Allah bless you and your husband with the wisdom, kindness and the strength to do do his will.
Eric