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View Full Version : I have decided to abandon my parents sect, how to not feel lonely?



SintoDinto
08-31-2020, 01:35 PM
Almost everyone I know is from this turkish jamiya, which according to the values of this website, has many bidat, and which I personally feel uncomfortable with in some issues and find some inconsistencies, and worry that they do indeed practice bidat because based on my quest for knowledge, some of their practices, especially given the reaction of outsider muslims, really seem strange. i studied a bit of psychology in my free time and did some soul searching and found that i often seek validation and am a bit emotional and sensitive, but i dont seem to get the support from anywhere except certain niches in the muslim community. i feel things very deeply. in psychology i would be an HSP, (literally, "highly sensitive person" dont laugh) and an enneagram 4. but i worry im just looking to be different and stand out, all i want is meaning though. i want to follow the true islam, and i know we're not supposed to be sectarian, but i dont know where to go about looking for knowledge, and though people in the jamiya wont disown me, theyll still talk to me, it would be awkward, because ill be a "stranger" in accordance with the hadeeth of strangers, like saying, "no, i dont do that, or that, or that, that's haram or bidat, or based on a weak hadeeth".
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kidcanman
09-01-2020, 05:35 PM
If islam is important enough to you, sincerely, for you to leave your parents sect, then it should be important enough for you to be ok with not receiving validation and acceptance.

If you feel lonely, then go back to your family's sect, because you are not actually into your beliefs, enough for you to pursue them wholeheartedly. Why hurt yourself and your family when you don't feel dedicated to your other way?

When you feel ready to give up everything for that other way, then do it; and you won't need the validation and you will see the big picture.
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wayfarer91
09-01-2020, 11:33 PM
That is a brave thing to do.. Ive seen many people abandon their parents' sects because they didnt feel it was right..

What you can do is for the time being focus on understanding the sect u are aiming for and strengthen the beliefs..there is no need to feel lonely.. I dont known how it works in ur state, bit in my region ive seen ssunnis convert to shiaism d, deobandis to barelviis, and barelvis to wahabis without the consent of their parents.. However, their parents or friends did not abandon them. Because everyone has the right to choose and u cant force deen upon anyone.
If you still feel sad then it would be better that u stayed in ur ancestral sect. Abu jandal left paganism despite his family abandoning them, there are so many other cases where the muslims chose the truth despite knowing the consquences.. Because when u know that u are following the truth nothing else matters
. You are not leaving the religion, just the biddahs attached with them. So no need to worry.
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