format_quote Originally Posted by
Imraan
Has a knock on effect and makes me weak in reality. Im the opposite, I find it hard to act strong and easy to drown in my own vulnerabilities...
In this world, need to be strong in dealing with issues and calamities....
I pray I get stronger over time or being able to control it at least.
It could also stem from emotional trauma...
Ah I see. Yeah, it may be easier for you to break down and cry than acting strong, but in reality that does show how strong you are. Emotional trauma is not easy to deal with, it's only natural for you to cry so much. But don't let that make you feel weak. All your past bad experiences have taken a toll on yourself and you are dealing with it.
If you are weeping in prayer, this is beloved. However, if you are broken to the point where it is effecting your lifestyle, you need to make changes. You talked about "drowning in your vulnerabilities".. So if your past experiences ARE having an impact on you as a person in a negative way, you need to take an approach and change that. The fact that you are TRYING is what makes you strong.
Otherwise, if you are vulnerable to all your traumas (whether major or minor) hitting you during prayer, this is a beautiful thing as long as it brings you closer to Allah. Sujud especially is where you can draw yourself closer to Allah and complain.