Wishing for the death of someone else?

[starlight54]

Salaam all,


this might be a strange question but I'd really appreciate hearing people's thoughts on this. Basically, my older brother is autistic. He can complete basic tasks himself and talk a little but he isn't mentally sound and is therefore exempt from all religious obligations such as prayer, fasting, etc. He't not held accountable for his deeds either (right). I'll try to keep this as short as I can:


His autism has always caused him to lash out physically and although my parents could control it when he was younger, it became hard to handle when he was a teenager so he was sent to live in a special care home for autistic teenagers and has since been in a few (moving once he reached adulthood, etc). He was on medication and for ages things were fine; he was calm again, rarely lashing out and if he did attack it would be a brief scratching or hair pulling (that isn't nice either but it wasn't horrendous) and then he'd calm down. About a year and a half ago, things got really bad out of nowhere. He was lashing out everyday every 5 minutes extremely aggressively and violently to the point where he had to have 3 staff handling him at all times (he is also a big, VERY strong guy and of course his even stronger when he's angry). Eventually things got so bad the care home had to call the police and he was sectioned and taken to a mental hospital where he was for 16 months. It was such a distressing time, especially for my mum, and so hard and heartbreaking to see him like that.


He was discharged about a month ago and moved into his new care home (the old one refused to take him back) and things were going okay-he attacked a bit every now and then but it was fine. Before he went to the hospital his routine was to visit home once a week-staff would drop him off then pick him up a couple of hours later and we were completely fine and safe without them alhamdulillah. His first home visit since being discharged was a couple of weeks ago and he was fine until it was time to leave and he lashed which was obviously because he didn't want to go. He was supposed to come last week but attacked before the staff left so they cancelled. Same thing happened yesterday. They decided to bring him over today to collect the food our parents made for him and because him not being able to visit home will make him more distressed and prone to lashing out. Well he came today and it was awful. It was just like it was before he was sent to hospital-extremely violent and aggressive, the staff had to take him outside and back to the car after him being in the house for just five 5 minutes. They struggled a lot in our front garden to hold him down and he basically broke free (like I said, VERY strong) so they had to grab him again and wrestle him to the ground to make him stop and my dad had to grab him too. It was so so terrifying and for the time being he wont be coming home because it's too dangerous honestly, if he got his hands on us he could kill us. But of course, he doesn't know what he's doing? Like, he knows he's attacking but he doesn't UNDERSTAND.


I know this is really long so far and I'm sorry it seems irrelevant but I just wanted to give some context to the question I'm asking because it's something my sister also mentioned; Is it haraam/a sin to wish for someone else's death? Honestly as much as we want to help our brother and it's heartbreaking to see him like this, it's also terrifying for all of us and when he begins to attack, our lives are honestly in danger. This has been happening for two years and the only reason I think it would be better for him to return to Allah is because we know he'd not be punished in the grave and he'd be going straight to Jannah. He'll be at peace and so will we. I know this sounds really horrible but I was just wondering other peoples' views on this, and also what more I can do on top of making dua to Allah and praying for the calmness of my brother and safety of our family.


Thank you so much

[IslamLife00]

wa'alaykumussalaam

Does he recite the Qur'an? If not, how does he react to Qur'an recitation, by you or others?

https://islamqa.info/en/answers/1255...e-or-possessed

https://islamqa.info/en/answers/240/...nic-possession

If he reacts violently, then do ruqya on him. You can ask your family to help, or a raqi you trust can help.

[Studentofdeed]

Sister thats different...your reason is understandable as you don't want to see anyone in pain. But still I would not wish that on him. I am so sorry to hear about your brother. As the sister mentioned above...is he possessed? Is there a reason for the attacks? Is he traumatized from a past experience? Is there a psychologist that can help him,? May Allah make it easy for you and your family