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bint e aisha
10-19-2020, 07:05 PM
Assalamu alaikum warahmatullah

Hope everyone is doing well by the grace of Allah SWT.

I'm going to use this thread to discuss teeny weeny issues I experience often in my daily life.

So my first question is: does any of you feel resentment in your heart for someone who sees your message but doesn't reply and how do you get over that feeling? It happens to me often like today in an Islamic Q&A group, the scholar answered questions of everyone but deliberately ignored mine, reason only Allah knows. I just want to get rid of any such negative feelings from my heart. Hope someone will help inshaAllah.
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Ümit
10-19-2020, 08:23 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by bint e aisha
Assalamu alaikum warahmatullah

Hope everyone is doing well by the grace of Allah SWT.

I'm going to use this thread to discuss teeny weeny issues I experience often in my daily life.

So my first question is: does any of you feel resentment in your heart for someone who sees your message but doesn't reply and how do you get over that feeling? It happens to me often like today in an Islamic Q&A group, the scholar answered questions of everyone but deliberately ignored mine, reason only Allah knows. I just want to get rid of any such negative feelings from my heart. Hope someone will help inshaAllah.
My guess is that someone who reads your message and is not sure about the answer...then he chooses silence over the risk of giving a wrong answer. Especially when he is a scholar.
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Iceee
10-19-2020, 09:58 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by bint e aisha
I just want to get rid of any such negative feelings from my heart.
Anger and negative feelings are completely normal for us human beings. Just like happiness and sadness.

Please give the scholar some time to answer your question, as they may be thinking of the answer and how to word it.
Or maybe they saw your question, but forgot to answer,
I'm thinking they saw your question, didn't know how to respond, and are thinking about it and will get back to you later Inshallah.

The best thing is to possibly ask another scholar or be patient and they will answer shortly Inshallah.
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bint e aisha
10-20-2020, 03:25 AM
@Ümit @Iceee

The question wasn't difficult for him to answer at all and it's not the first time he has ignored my question :(
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Studentofdeed
10-20-2020, 08:24 AM
You are right sister but maybe the scholar felt like he had to deal with other people questions where he thought it was more important. Maybe Insha'Allah he will address later. But honestly post them here and perhaps we can help. Regarding your first question...if someone ignores you...it could be they are busy or just don't find ur message significant. But as muslims.we have to give excuses however I personally fail at this so I cannot say I do this.

What I would say is this...if this person was truly your friend, they would make efforts and stay in touch. If they don't reply, they dont reply. Sometimes Allah puts barriers between people for one person. If a person has habit of not responding, I usually just leave it off and stop being friends with them seeing they do not reciprocate what I am doing. I still say salaam but I get the message that I am not that important to this person. The ill feeling is natural but remove it as it is rude as they should answer but also it is natural. I personally make sure to answer everyone messages because its more respectful. If im busy i tell them..I don't ghost them because that is cruel. If a person is avoiding you intentionally that is cruel and they should atleast give you a polite message saying busy but ignoring is really bad.

At the other hand, if someone comes to someone's house and they see the car, the person has a right to not go outside and not invite them. So Allah knows best. But just take it as you need people who make efforts not those who forget and don't make u a priority
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