format_quote Originally Posted by
Flos
Hopefully I wont be tested with what I'm going to say. I'm not sure how good I've been so far, how patient I've been so far... It's not that easy to become one of those who enter Jannah without account. This patience is for very sick who smile, for mother that loses a child and smiles, for those who lose everything and smile with no tears at all... I've been through some things with the smile and tawakul, but I haven't lost everything, haven't lost a child...
My favorite surah is al Waqiah, and I used to want to be among the assabiqoon, but I'm super far away from that. I still love that surah the most, although I never think I'd be among them
Please dont think of yourself like this.Allah doesnt test a soul more than it can bear.Maybe the soul of those mothers who lost a child can bear the death of 10 children,but the maximum your soul can bear is the test you are going through.So please,dont think that.Nobody knows where they stand in the eyes of Allah.Remember even the prostitute who spend her life doing zinnah,it took only one moment for her to get jannah,one moment,when she gave water to the thirsty dog.
Keep making duaa as you always do and keep trying.Maybe there will be a moment in your life that will make you be among the assabiqoon.
Remember you wont jannah with your good deeds,all you need is to get the mercy of Allah.You need a moment,smth ''unique'',an excuse to make you get that mercy.For a sahaba,his love for surah ikhlas would make him enter jannah,for you maybe it is the love of al waqiah and the fact you want to be among the assabiqoon.Just keep trying and think good of Allah. :)