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View Full Version : I feel so scared and guilty of my sins. How can I stop sinning like this?



LoveProphets
05-17-2021, 11:44 AM
As-Salam Alaikum dear readers, I am a young boy in his early teenage. Bismillah, I don't know what I should do really. I am going to start off by being super honest, I used to never be super religious. It wasn't a lack of faith in Allah SWT or in his messengers, I always followed the main stuff like no pork, no porn, no disobeying to the parents (Something because of the parents that I have, who have a very love-hate relationship with me) was proven to be quite difficult at times but I managed it. It is only as of recently that I discovered a rather good scholar, because of the way he talks, it's interesting to watch. Honestly I am not into guys who talk without emotions and just keep on saying, this guy did the right thing with the right method. To bring people back you need some entertainment and education, and mashallah the guy I am talking about is Dr Zakir Naik if anyone is curious. I have been very interested in the stories of prophet, in becoming a righteous Muslim these days naturally by Allah SWT. I love prophets and I love their stories too, of course, but I have been having this problem lately which annoys me, scares me and keeps me depressed or far from enjoying life. I will say to you now I love Prophet Adam, Moses, Muhammed, Abrahim, David, Yahya, Jesus and everyone else who has been a messenger and prophet of God (May peace and blessings of Allah SWT be upon them all) but there is one thing that I love more. My guardian, my helper, my creator, the ever so glorious, the ever so merciful, the ever so great Allah SWT. My problem is that I feel that my heart is 100% clean and pure, mashallah but my brain is 75% of Satan and 25% of me. I commit sins like shirk literally because I end up calling something or someone else God again and again by accident. This happens over and over. I always repent and I always know deep inside my heart that it wasn't in my slightest intention never. This also happens to prophets that Satan forces me to disrespect prophets sometimes in someway and notice how this especially happens when I am praising them. Indeed, Satan is the worst of the disbelievers. I know Allah SWT is ever so merciful, he knows that it is not my intention to commit shirk or curse any prophet or him at all, but I feel super guilty and scared. I wish I could control my mind. I just can't. It happens in my mind most of the times, and glorious is my Lord that Satan is mostly unable to make me say it out in reality, but it happens in my mind which still makes me feel very guilty. I love my Allah SWT, I love my prophets. I am begging and dying for a peace of mind, I want to praise them, not curse them. I am not a disbeliever!. Please please I beg of you all to somehow help me or suggest a way that I can find peace of mind and that I can get over this fear.
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