format_quote Originally Posted by
Khan123
Yes,they're basically cultural and societal objections,there is nothing bad with the guy he respects me alot. My family just fears about the society, that you want to marry someone who is not of your cast not of your status. They're not looking for my happiness yes they're worried about me that how i'd live with him but alhumdulillah he is one of the toppers of the class, he is sharp minded and has many future plans. I am very depressed i cant neither see my parents like this nor him. May ALLAH help me ameen.
Assalamualaikum
Well, Islam doesn't recommend looking caste or status. Prophet Mohammed (pbuh) said, “There is nothing like marriage, for
two who
love". It means marriage is the best thing for them.
However Islam also recommends kufu in marriage i.e compatibility. If there is no compatibility, then problems may arise later on in life. Please understand that compatibility is not love. It's a practical approach to life.
For example, you are from a well to do family. And he may be from lower income family. The way of their thinking, behavior and standard may be less compared to that of yours. After marriage, when you really start to live with your in-laws. You maybe living according to your standard. But for them, it could be showoff, arrogance of ego. Because, your standard of living might seem high end to them.
Further, this may develop inferiority complex in your husband. And jealousy in your in-laws. And the problem starts, he will try to show that what ever you are doing is worthless. And your in-laws may do such acts which may show you of no value. This will hurt your feelings and you will start to dislike your decision. It may lead to fights and further to divorce.
If you have planned all these things. And if you still think, he is a good match for you. Then your parents can't force you to marry others. You need to convince them about all the aspects which are related to kufu to your parents (I gave just one example, there are many). You can raise all these points with your boy friend and discuss what he feels about all these matters. See this link :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdeI-1H_LAU
Islam is easy, if everyone follows them with balance.