I can only do one or the other not both. Okay I might be able to rent a car an still get lazer but I'm not sure yet If I can. I'm ashamed to be seen with it at mosque the feeling is really horrible.
When you are in doubt, ask some time the fameous dua for istikhara Allahumma khirli wakhtarli.
Do not preocupy yourself with past to much. Now and future are more important.
Some did terrible acts, but upon accepting Islam (and pledge they will be good citizen, like not even do zina etc., search about bayah) it was forgiven them, even the evils they did to friends and family.
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