View Full Version : question about relationship
leesh97
10-28-2023, 10:04 AM
I was born muslim however growing up my mum wasn’t religious and I never kept religion in my life as I got older. I’ve always felt it was a part of me due to being surrounded by it as a child and I always felt protective over it as I saw the beauty of Islam. When I was 11 we moved away from my family so I wasn’t around anyone who was muslim which added to me not classing myself as a muslim. Even as a child i never understood anything about Islam or being muslim.
Now i’m 26 I’m wanting to learn more about my religion and really understand what it is to be muslim. I’m classing myself more as a revert due to the way I have been living, fortunately i’m close to my cousins who are practicing muslims and they are guiding me on what books to read and to different places for reverts to learn more. This is where my question is, I am in a relationship and I got into the relationship prior to my feelings now. He comes from a Christian family and we have had deep discussions about how we both want to learn more about our faith and he has even said how he would like to learn more about Islam but he’s a point where he doesn’t know much about Christianity so would want to learn more about Christianity first. We have spoken about marriage and discussed how we would progress with our different religions and I know for muslim women you cannot marry a Christian man. As I am only just learning myself I do not want to pressure him and want him to do it as part of his own journey so he can fall in love with the religion for himself not because I have told him to. So i’m just wondering would it be wrong of me to support him in learning about his own faith and understanding it so then he could progress to learning about islam? I would really love any advice not just on this but anything to do more with learning about Islam.
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Supernova
10-29-2023, 04:18 PM
Asalaamualaykum:
What you thinking of attempting here would be wrong on multiple levels such so that I'd be shocked if one reply would include every one of these wrongs.
Any Muslim who has made progress in their Deen, would tell you its next to impossible to "progress" in your Deen while having a sideline outright Haraam habit.
What would you do as you progress in your deen and come across the ayahs of Zina ? Please don't reply as this is something for you to think about.
If you putting your "love" for this man before this Deen and yet think you progressing, then you misleading yourself. In the time of Nabi [SAW] many people accepted the Deen their whilst their spouses and family didn't. They left their husbands and wives for the truth of this Deen. So please don't for one minute think that you're in a UNIQUE situation.
Two surahs come to mind regarding your situation: and believe me others here would give you many more surahs and Hadith.
1. Surah Kafiroon : the Mushirkeen of Macca offer the Nabi [SAW] a "truce". One day we all be Kafiroon and the next day we alternate to Islam, bouncing back and forth. Not identical to your position but similar in principal. Allah SWT rejects this "truce" - think about this very carefully.
2. Surah Al Mujadala : Ending Ayahs whereby Allah SWT speaks of two parties : HizbuShaytaan and HizbAllah
There are only two parties those that follow Shaytaan and those that follow Allah - This last part is where Allah praises those that left the family, wives and husbands who remained Kaafirs while they have moved on accepting this Deen. Think about this carefully they left their FAMILY as opposed to you with your boyfriend.
Think about what you attempting in regards of the two evidences I have gave.
What you seeing as progress in this case is in reality regressing.
- - - Updated - - -
Asalaamualaykum:
What you thinking of attempting here would be wrong on multiple levels such so that I'd be shocked if one reply would include every one of these wrongs.
Any Muslim who has made progress in their Deen, would tell you its next to impossible to "progress" in your Deen while having a sideline outright Haraam habit.
What would you do as you progress in your deen and come across the ayahs of Zina ? Please don't reply as this is something for you to think about.
If you putting your "love" for this man before this Deen and yet think you progressing, then you misleading yourself. In the time of Nabi [SAW] many people accepted the Deen their whilst their spouses and family didn't. They left their husbands and wives for the truth of this Deen. So please don't for one minute think that you're in a UNIQUE situation.
Two surahs come to mind regarding your situation: and believe me others here would give you many more surahs and Hadith.
1. Surah Kafiroon : the Mushirkeen of Macca offer the Nabi [SAW] a "truce". One day we all be Kafiroon and the next day we alternate to Islam, bouncing back and forth. Not identical to your position but similar in principal. Allah SWT rejects this "truce" - think about this very carefully.
2. Surah Al Mujadala : Ending Ayahs whereby Allah SWT speaks of two parties : HizbuShaytaan and HizbAllah
There are only two parties those that follow Shaytaan and those that follow Allah - This last part is where Allah praises those that left the family, wives and husbands who remained Kaafirs while they have moved on accepting this Deen. Think about this carefully they left their FAMILY as opposed to you with your boyfriend.
Think about what you attempting in regards of the two evidences I have gave.
What you seeing as progress in this case is in reality regressing.
Reply
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