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S_87
04-28-2005, 10:43 AM
:sl:

this is not a yes no thread i want to know if u would or wouldnt seriously really honestly k?

say a gooooooooooooooooood friend of yours is getting married...and his/her wedding is going to be a massive mixed musiced picture video u get the drift wedding

would you seriosuly really go?

:w:
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Sahabiyaat
04-28-2005, 10:48 AM
no
u can sacrifice alot for others
but wud anyone exchange their deeds ?
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S_87
04-28-2005, 11:03 AM
so how would u tell ur friend ur not gonna be there?
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Z
04-28-2005, 11:07 AM
Asalamu Alaikum

I wouldn't go no. No chance.

I'd tell them straight sister, Islam forbids all this. I don't care whether you get hurt over it or not, but if I hurt Allah in making you happy and turning up, then forget about it. Don't wait for an answer or a polite 'but', just walk off.
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IslamicBrother
04-28-2005, 11:08 AM
No i wouldn't go. I have missed such weddings of close people before, i really dont care if they are hurt or insulted. Losing the company of unislamic people is not my headache. :)
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S_87
04-28-2005, 11:29 AM
hmmmmmmmmm i see so what if this was like one of ur closest friends
you dont usually..but just for them?
would u still say no?
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Z
04-28-2005, 11:31 AM
Asalamu Alaikum

Take this perspective.

You make a friend happy once, you displease Allah forever. Count your losses.
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S_87
04-28-2005, 11:39 AM
:sl:

hmm thats true

jazakAllah you lot..your convincing me :D
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Abdalla
04-28-2005, 11:52 AM
jus say ''im busy'' if you are to weak to say i cant go, personally i just dont appear at the wedding (they never notice!)
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MetSudaisTwice
04-28-2005, 11:52 AM
am sure they would notice bro, she says she is a goooooooood friend of her
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Brother_Mujahid
04-28-2005, 12:16 PM
Originally Posted by amani
:sl:

this is not a yes no thread i want to know if u would or wouldnt seriously really honestly k?

say a gooooooooooooooooood friend of yours is getting married...and his/her wedding is going to be a massive mixed musiced picture video u get the drift wedding

would you seriosuly really go?

:w:
if the person was a real good friend, then you would know them and they would know you pretty well. so if after finding out the wedding is going to be mixed seating with music being blasting and whatever else, then a good friend would understand if you opted to not attend such a wedding.

wasalam :shade:
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Brother_Mujahid
04-28-2005, 12:20 PM
Originally Posted by zAk
loq,

tht's a better thing to do, present an EXCUSE !! :)
wouldn't that be lying, besides telling the truth would be a much wiser thing to do. Obviously you need to state the reason you are not going to attend is because of such and such will be happening at your wedding and it contradicts what we follow as muslims follow.

all in a nice way hopefully, so the person does not take offense and think you know it all.

wasalam :shade:
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Far7an
04-28-2005, 12:31 PM
Are they going to have music throughout the whole ceromony? When I usually go, they start the music after everyone finishes eating. So I eat and leave :p
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Z
04-28-2005, 12:56 PM
Asalamu Alaikum

Originally Posted by farhan247
Are they going to have music throughout the whole ceromony? When I usually go, they start the music after everyone finishes eating. So I eat and leave :p
Greedy bugger!

Don't lie, or make an excuse. Be honest and up front, and with the correct delievery, it might have some effect on your friend who may even choose to scrap all the "show".

An alternative is to send your little cousins (if you have any) to bring some food for you from the kitchen. I like eating on my own, outside.
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S_87
04-28-2005, 01:22 PM
no there wont be music all through
there will be on the mehndi day and theres gonna be a video man too :'(

also if i went i cant just eat and leave ...therell be stage and everything and knowing her she would choose our outfits too :S so if i dont go i dont go at all
but if i go ill be part of all the bad :(

my lil cousins wont be there :p
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Far7an
04-28-2005, 01:25 PM
Originally Posted by amani
no there wont be music all through
there will be on the mehndi day and theres gonna be a video man too :'(
Yeh, similar thing happend at one wedding my parents went to..they walked out :p
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MetSudaisTwice
04-28-2005, 01:26 PM
sis amani the best thing to do is tell your friend the truth of why you can't attend the wedding or make some sort of arrangement that will suit you both
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Khaldun
04-28-2005, 01:49 PM
:sl:

Remember the truth never needs many words, whereas the Lie never can get enough. meaning that if you give a false excuse this time, trust me something will go wrong and you will have to explain yourself and in the end it wont look good for you....be honest and say that you would really want to attend the wedding but if it is a choice between pleasing Allah or a mere Insan then the choice is obvious
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MetSudaisTwice
04-28-2005, 01:50 PM
yeah sis amani i totally agree with bro khaldun, just tell the honest truth and you will feel better than lying
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S_87
04-28-2005, 01:51 PM
i wouldnt make an excuse cos im not good at lying :-[
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MetSudaisTwice
04-28-2005, 01:53 PM
then sis tell the truth she will understand
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Z
04-28-2005, 02:18 PM
Asalamu Alaikum

Tell her/him your dog chewed the invite... or you younger brother fed it to the goldfish.

Oh sweet, those junior school days...
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S_87
04-28-2005, 03:14 PM
:sl: ^^ :lol: hmph the world isnt as thick as those teachers who sometimes believed them excuses :(

JazakAllah ...i dont think ill to the halls..
and inshaAllah i wont regret it either
this weddings ages away ??? in summer but already preparing ;D
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Uthman
04-28-2005, 03:57 PM
:sl:

The scholar Sheikh Abu Hanifa on Islam Channel was asked this question. His advice was to tell them the truth about why you couldn't go and help them understand. He also said that you can go to visit them one day before the wedding and one day after the wedding :)

:w:
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h1jabi_sista
04-29-2005, 07:02 PM
or...you could forcast a 'flu'?? ;) NO sorry bad advice!

the brothers have got good advice for you, tell the truth and if she's a good friend she'll understand and you can visit her later! :)
:w:
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BlissfullyJaded
04-29-2005, 07:21 PM
:sl:

We just tell 'em straight off why we're not gonna be there. Usually they understand and they're fine with it..

But then...we don't go to many weddings anyway, so maybe thats why they understand... :)
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S_87
04-29-2005, 07:31 PM
yh i dont go to weddings either but this is my friend who like is my longest good friend :D first friend i made in school when i moved to englanda ..only friend who managed to laugh at my accent then
only friends for a lotttttttttttttttttttttt of things so thats why its gonna be hard :p

HS i cant forcast a flu :( im gonna be there for most of the week when its not mixed so she`ll not believe me ;) good idea otherwise though ;D
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S_87
04-29-2005, 07:32 PM
Originally Posted by Osman
:sl:

The scholar Sheikh Abu Hanifa on Islam Channel was asked this question. His advice was to tell them the truth about why you couldn't go and help them understand. He also said that you can go to visit them one day before the wedding and one day after the wedding :)

:w:
:sl:

inshaAllah ill be there a few days before the wedding (from three days before wedding its mixed halls ;) here :( )
:D
and yup ill tell her the truth
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SalafiFemaleJih
04-29-2005, 07:49 PM
Asalamualaikum wr wb,

I'm going to the weddin in june...its my cousins wedding....FIRST cousin...we are all really really close to each other...she is going to have her mehandi and haraam music all dat sht.

I have to go to her wedding...because my whole khandan is going to be there...inculding my family...its like 4 to 5 hours from where I live....my parents will not leave me alone for 3/4 days...not in milllion years. I even told my mom that I have school...she said I still have to go....

I don really wanna miss her wedding...but music and haraam stuff which is going to happen there is makin me change my mind.

well she is going to have girls/guys seperated though...but by the end of the party it gets all mixed...subhanAllah.

I'm havin second thoughts....
I really don know what I should do.....

walaikum salaam wr wb.
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S_87
04-29-2005, 07:56 PM
well totally unrealistic option is come down mine and we`ll party together ;)

:( not possible :p ;D

how bout u off the music if u HAVE to go?
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h1jabi_sista
04-29-2005, 08:01 PM
HS? wow! i like it!

you cant actually off music but you can turn it off!! hahaha sorry i dont mean to be tease its just that i said once ' can you off the light' and my sis teased me for ages about! :p

well if your really stuck you could always do an istikara?
:w:
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S_87
04-29-2005, 08:03 PM
i always say off the light man or off the light nuh :confused: :-[
we all do in my fam
what else r u supposed to say?
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makaveli
04-29-2005, 08:47 PM
I would go. It's going to be a fun time and the person getting married is one of your best friends! I'm sure he or she would show up at your wedding. Party Up!
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S_87
04-29-2005, 08:53 PM
yh but in the mean time earn sins?
and knowing what im doing is wrong?
i couldnt live with that
and then what about other friends who get married?
same thing?
:(
so thats loads of bad :(
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Z
04-29-2005, 08:58 PM
Asalamu Alaikum

I tell ya what, give me a few good reps first and then...

...I'll storm the place with my troops. We'll take out the video man, the DJ, and all the semi nude women - SWAT style! Then you can go in and enjoy yourself. Your not far from me either, so it'll be a quick move too. How's that? :D
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Ibn Syed
04-29-2005, 09:00 PM
:sl:
That wouldn't be that Islamic and I wouldn't do that. That would be totally crazy. Mayhem.
:w:
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Z
04-29-2005, 09:01 PM
Asalamu Alaikum

Oh, and I forgot to add, I was only being sarcastic.
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S_87
04-29-2005, 09:01 PM
...and all the men and your on :thumbs_up lol
were talking ago good few thousand ;)
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Ibn Syed
04-29-2005, 09:02 PM
:sl:
I think you're high on sugar if you coughed all that up in one post.
:w:
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Z
04-29-2005, 09:03 PM
Asalamu Alaikum

Huh?
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Z
04-29-2005, 09:03 PM
Asalamu Alaikum

Well I think the men would run naturally. They'll be terrified just seeing us... :p
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Ibn Syed
04-29-2005, 09:05 PM
Crazy imagination you got there.
:w:
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