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Anonymous sis,
I'm saddened to hear what you have been through. May Allah have mercy on you. Ameen. I have gathered some information to help you make a stance for your rights according to Islam inshaAllah. I hope it's helpful.
The Quran on Marriage
In Surah Al-Rum Chapter 30, Verse 21 (30:21)
“And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts)”.
In Surah Nisa Chapter 4, Verse 21 (4:21)
The Qur’an refers to marriage as a “Misaq” that is a sacred covenant or agreement between husband and wife.
In Surah Nisa Chapter 4, Verse 19 (4: 19)
“Oh! You who believe, you are forbidden to inherit women against their will!”
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Consent In Marriage
1) consent of
both parties.
2) " Mahr" a gift from the groom to his bride.
3) Witnesses- 2 male or female.
4) The marriage should be publicized, it should never be kept secret as it leads to suspicion and troubles within the community
Coercion does not count as consent. Therefore sis, as you had been forced to sign the marriage contract you will now have to seek legal help to invalidate the Nikah, if your parents do not accept your basic moral and legal right.
Also your husband does not have any moral or legal rights over you, till the time that you give him such rights, with the willingness of your heart. In your circumstances it is not sinful on your part to refuse talking to him or to seek legal help in revoking the said marriage contract.
The Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam prohibited forcing a virgin in marriage without her permission, whether by her father or anyone else. Furthermore, `Aa'ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, related that she once asked the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam: "In the case of a young girl whose parents marry her off, should her permission be sought or not?" He sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam replied: "Yes, she must give her permission." She then said: "But a virgin would be shy, O Messenger of Allaah!" He sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam replied: "Her silence is [considered as] her permission." [Al-Bukhaari, Muslim, & Others]
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Hadith on forced marriage
The Prophet (pbuh) prohibited the practise of forced marriages as completely going against the purpose of marriage as set out in the Quran.
Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported that the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam (may Allaah exalt his mention) said: "A non-virgin woman may not be married without her command, and a virgin may not be married without her permission; and enough permission for her is to remain silent (because of her natural shyness)." [Al-Bukhaari, Muslim & Others]
A woman said to the Prophet that her father married her to a relative of his in order to improve his own social standing. He did not ask her views on this marriage before he did it. The Prophet ruled the marriage to be dissolved immediately. The woman said: "Now, messenger of God, I approve of what my father has done. I only wanted that women should know that men have no say in their matrimonial affairs."
ONE day, a beautiful woman by the name of Jameela, daughter of Abi Ibn Salool, came to the assembly of Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) and said to Him: "O prophet of Allah, nothing can make my head and his (her husband's head) to be together in one place." Then she went on to describe how ugly and repulsive she found him to be in appearance. The Prophet asked her if her husband had given her anything as dower. Jameela informed him that he had given her an orchard of dates as her mehr. At this the Prophet asked her if she was ready and willing to return the orchard to him. She replied, "Yes, that and more!" At this he said, "Not more, not more." Then the Prophet sent for her husband, Sabit bin Qais, informed him of his wife's feelings and intention and conducted a divorce between them.
A companion of the Prophet, Mughira bin Shuba, reported that when he intended to marry a certain woman and to send the proposal of marriage to her, the Prophet asked him, "Have you seen her?" The man said "No". The Prophet advised him, "Take a look at her, as this would be more conducive to producing affection, love and pleasant harmony between the two of you". (Musnad Ahmed, Tirmizi, Nisai, Ibn Majah). So love and harmony between the spouses are essential ingredients of a successful marriage.
Once a young woman came to the Prophet and said that her father had married her off as a minor, and that she had obviously not been consulted. The Prophet said that she could leave her husband if she so wished. She replied, "I have no desire to leave him. I simply wanted to know my rights." This was the Prophet's way of honouring the female.
And of His signs is this: He created spouses for you from among yourselves that you might find comfort in them, and He put between you love and mercy. Surely there are signs in that for people who reflect. (Qur'an 30:21)
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Your Rights To Divorce
According to a narrative reported by Abu Dawood, once when a case of forced marriage was reported to the Prophet (pbuh), he allowed the woman (who was forced into marriage) the option to revoke the marriage, if she desired to do so (Abu Dawood, Kitaab al-Nikah, Narrative No. 1797).
Question (Islam Online)
What are the rights of a woman in Islam to get a divorce from her husband when he has decided not to give divource/khula? He has the intention of keeping her in his grip/want to punish her this way? How she can take khula, when he refuses to give divorce, or when the Qadi (Judge) is not accepting khula? or when the husband is in another country to be available to the local Qadi/court?
Answer
If that woman is in a non-Muslim country, she should file for divorce to the court. When she gets the decree of divorce, she can go to an Islamic authority who is knolwedgeable enough to arbitrate with her husband. The resolution he makes becomes valid. If the husband refuses to accept the arbitration, that authority can issue her a divorce certificate and she can marshall the contents of the certificate by herself. She can enforce her rights by the help of the local government.
Allah Ta’ala says in the Holy Quran:
"If you fear that they (husband and wife) are not able to keep the limits ordained by Allah, then there is no sin on either of them in that which the wife gives (in lieu of freedom). These are the limits ordained by Allah. And whosoever transgresses the limits of Allah, then such are the wrong-doers."
(Surah Al Baqara verse 229)
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Khula (when a woman initiates divorce)
Please refer to link:
http://www.jamiat.org.za/aj/ifta/khula.htm
Lastly sis, if you proceed with the annulment of this marriage, there will be no sin of disobedience to your parents. Islam has given you this right and as I can see from your situation, there is nothing else for it. Your parents cursing you for doing what Islam permits does not hold in the eyes of Allah. May Allah give your parents hidayah and make matters easy for you. Do what is right in the eyes of Allah, it is Him we shall answer to at the end. Just always be respectful to your parents, even if they are wrong. May Allah have mercy on you and bless you with peace and happiness. Ameen.
format_quote Originally Posted by
anis_z24
Salam
I say lets make a Du aa on this forum for anonymous.
the first thing you do before you even move anywhere is make du aa to Allah(ask God for help)
InshaAllah & ameen to all the duaas.
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