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Z
05-19-2005, 10:02 AM
Asalamu Alaikum

I'm guessing this isn't the best time to start such a topic, but with the help of Allah, I'll continue.

The moment I joined this forum, I felt I had come to a good place (hence the quick addiction - addiction to an Islamic enviroment). But, a few weeks later, I start reading things which are somewhat questionable but khair, no one is free from sin and fitnah. So, as time passes, I make good friends with a few brothers and masha Allah, I can say I'm happy to have made friends with them.

Now, as it happens, things on this forum are going from bad, to worse, yet nothing (according to me) is being done about it. I don't know the reason as to why nothing is being done, but if someone doesn't stand up to it, then this place will be nothing but a meeting point for a brother and sister who Allah forbid, but will go into something evil.

Recently, I discovered sisters are befreinding brothers, subhan Allah! Now with me being on the lookout for my brother as always, and due to the tender age and thinking, I try giving hints and pointing out what is wrong, but little do people reconise these things. Insha Allah may Allah correct my intention if it isn't yet correct but I am only making this topic to bring the happenings to your attention brothers and sisters and I'm sure you'll agree, a PM to each member would not have been a better method to approach it.

I ask the sisters of this forum, remember what you are for. Bear in mind your reason and act accordingly. And that means you too brothers!

I don't find the strengh to post a long post full of Quraan ayats and whatnot, but I'm sure we all agree that chatting with members of the opposite sex is forbidden in Islam whether it's face to face, or on MSN Messenger. I am no scholar and my knowledge is only limited but masha Allah we have some brothers and sisters on here who know more and will correct me if I'm wrong but this includes over the phone and via email.

I myself have been caught up in this flaw but alhamdulillah, with the aid of a brother I have gotten away from it.

Now what I don't understand is, why do we read and forget? Masha Allah sister Amani must have taken her time out to post this article, and yet it seems we have hardly taken it on board. Now for what reason must she have posted it, for getting at someone? Because she was bored? No, I don't think it's anything other than that she was looking out for her sisters and giving advice to the brothers. She was doing what everyone should be doing, enjoining good, and forbidding (warning about) evil.

In the same sense, sister 3washey had taken her time out to post an article of a sister who got caught up in what some sisters and brothers on here are doing. Yet, after reading one persons troubles, we fail to take heed. Why sisters and brothers? Do we find ourselves as exceptions? Do we need to hear it more from others? Subhan Allah! We believe in our Lord, yet we have never seen His beautiful self. We Believe in Jannah and Jahanum, yet we have never seen these places. We believe in what the Quraan has to say, yet hardly any of it can be proven to us. Is it that we don't wish to believe that this could happen to us like what happend had happened to the sister in the story that sister 3washey had again taken her time out posting for the same reason as sister Amani did?

Let us wake up brothers and sisters, and see what it is we are doing. Let this not be a hurtful post to any of you, as then my intentions will be defeated! Allow this to be a warning, and think of it as a time to change our current ways. If we are doing what we shouldn't be doing, then I pray, may Allah give us all the ability to change. And if one of you does change your ways after reading this message, I hope Allah rewards and forgives us both insha Allah ameen.

I do come to believe the moderators of this forum are busy with studies and other things and I pray may Allah make it easy for them, but I do hope they will start clamping down on the actions of some sisters, and brothers. Put an end to what is not only going on, on the surface and on the forums, but what befreinding has also and is going on via the message system subhan Allah.

This post is far from being finished, but my time is limited, my words are limited, my courage is limited as I too commit sins and feel the guilt when forbidding others, and life itself limited. Let us change now sisters, and brothers.

I end this post hoping that if any of you may have taken a slight bit of it to heart and felt even a tad bit of hurt, I sincerely ask for your forgivness. And I pray that this has to be the last time that warnings had to be posted and that Allah will give us sisters and brothers to act accordingly even on a forum and that Allah gives the humble moderators and admins. of this forum the ability to do a good and proper job and uphold the true feeling, and community that Islam brings when brothers and sisters are brought together.

Take care all and remember the dying and struggling Muslim ummah in your humble duas insha Allah.
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Brother_Mujahid
05-19-2005, 10:30 AM
hmmmmm i have spoken to two members and they did seem to voice pretty much the same concern, especialy with the board growing day by day. It would be better we tackle or do what we can now, rather than trying to change and make ammendments latter.

I think a few members need to get together with the mods admins and see what they have to say. We can then take it from there inshallah.
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ahm
05-19-2005, 10:34 AM
:sl:

I haven't seen anything untoward going on. I doubt people come here to flirt. There are easier places to do that.

:w:
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asmauk
05-19-2005, 11:26 AM
Assalamu alaikum

I agree with bro ahm, mind you I haven’t been here for long so I could be missing these things.

The other thing is brother Abdul, how can you spot these faults in people just by what they type? Sister Amani masha'Allah is one of the most respected sisters on this board and I was surprised to see how you almost reprimanded her on her overuse of smilies.. I apologise if my tone comes across as harsh, and if I offend you I sincerely apologise.

Also I was not aware that talking between opposite genders was haram. As far as my limited understanding permits me to comprehend, a basic requirement of such a conversation is Hayaa (shyness/modesty). Also the conversation should be kept within requirements of Shariah (i.e. no lewdness/flirting/inappropriate language etc) and the people should not be in khulwa (seclusion) because being in public (which this forum is) combined with a general regard for hayaa should prevent any inappropriate behaviour. Please bear in mind that this is only my understanding on things and if I’m mistaken I ask brothers/sisters to please correct me...and Allah to forgive me for my flaws.

I am all for being cautious and not stepping over the line with regards what you say to members of the opposite gender, however I can't help feeling that some people are being a tad judgmental of their brothers and sisters without knowing their intentions. Surely Allah is the fairest Judger and if any bro's/sisters do come on here with insincere intentions then that will be dealt with, by The Almighty SWT.

However, I do agree that some avenues of communication (which may be being used) such as MSN or email where the people are in Khulwa should be strongly discouraged....and for that I thank you brother.

The reminder posted by amani was good article with very pertinent points which every1 should take into account, however, I haven’t seen the frequent abuse of these guidelines (on this forum) as you seem to imply.

May Allah forgive me for my shortcomings and Brother I hope you accept this reply in the kind manner it was intended.

Wa'allahu alam

Wa'alaikumu Salam
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ahm
05-19-2005, 12:43 PM
:sl:

Thing is a non-physical medium. No need to lower your gaze, watch your voice etc. Just watch what you say, e.g no swearing or flirting etc.

If people have issues then we should keep our gender hidden then there's no problem right? Then truly we are just "minds" onthe web, are we not?

:w:
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Bin Qasim
05-19-2005, 12:58 PM
:sl:
that's too much to say br ahm.
No need to lower your gaze, watch your voice etc. Just watch what you say, e.g no swearing or flirting etc.
Isn't there a hadith which tells us to lower our gaze when passing bazaar, correct me if I am wrong.
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ahm
05-19-2005, 01:09 PM
:sl:

Erm.. ok try reading but not looking at the screen (ie - lower your gaze).

I'm saying you don't have to lower your gaze on a forum.

:w:
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Ansar Al-'Adl
05-19-2005, 06:55 PM
:sl:
Br. Abdul and other members, if you see any of the aforementioned problems, please do not hesitate to contact the admins and mods. We'll try to do what we can to stop any fitnah.

:w:
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