09-12-2006, 01:55 PM
Asalamualikum. I just thought i'd share my dilema, in return hoping to get a better insight into what I want to do.Reply
Right. The subject of striving to better my knowledge of the deen, thus inshAllah bettering myself has more than occasionaly been on my mind. Part of me wants to go and the other part of me doesnt even know what day it is sometimes. You can say im two people but in the same body. I have recently got my self a job and Alhamdulilah been promoted. Now in the next coming months I have been told that my job itself will take on a new role, become permanent and again be promoted.
Now I worked really hard to get to wear I have in life, as i was often put down by some who thought i would be no good at anything or get anywhere in life. But I have got to the stage where I as a muslim has recognised the dire need to improve his imaan and knowledge of the deen.
Now comes the dilema, or shall i say an excuse or whispers of shaytan. I want to go as i have ackoweldged there is a great need to go, but dont want to leave my job, because I feel i will not get this opprtunity in terms of a job and secondly i feel i need to find myself a spouse. And to add i had bit of an emotional year and somewhat of a spiratual decline between me and my rabb. So do i be strong and do hijra for the sake of Allah and to safeguard my deen or do I stay behind and follow the cattle and hope it will go away overtime.
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