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AnonymousPoster
09-13-2006, 07:44 AM
:sl:
brothers and sisters
I want to know that if u want to forget something/someone what should u do ? Is there any aayah ,any mental exercise,any thing........that canbe done .......b'cos the more I try to forget it ,the more it haunts me ........I want to take it off my mind completely ..........
every one is welcome to give me piece of advice ,please.

please help me

:w:
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lolwatever
09-13-2006, 07:46 AM
^ lol happens to me too :D

a quick fix might be to bizzy urself with something else, solve some problems.. do homework.. something that fully occupies ur concentration... go over 2 some friends place n hav a chat.... that's the best way coz u get carried away reeeeeallly easily and b4 u know it uve totally 4gotten about it....

ofcourse.. until u leave the doorstep :p

salamz
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Woodrow
09-13-2006, 07:51 AM
I'm a bit confused as to why anybody would want to forget anything. True we may have some sad memories we would like to forget, yet the forgetting them would make good memories meaningless. We may have thoughts of guilt and would like to forget what we have done, but Allah(swt) is the only one who can forgive our guilt. With no memory of our guilt we would not know what to seek forgiveness for.

Deliberetly wanting to forget, is one of shaytans tools that drives us humans to seek the use of alcohol and/or drugs.

It is far better to have a good memory and pray to Allah(swt) for guidance and strength in handling our memories.
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lolwatever
09-13-2006, 07:54 AM
^ ur right woodrow, u4got that lollypops can turn guilt in2useful memories :p
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Malaikah
09-13-2006, 08:00 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow
I'm a bit confused as to why anybody would want to forget anything. True we may have some sad memories we would like to forget, yet the forgetting them would make good memories meaningless. We may have thoughts of guilt and would like to forget what we have done, but Allah(swt) is the only one who can forgive our guilt. With no memory of our guilt we would not know what to seek forgiveness for.
:sl:

do you mean you understood the post as some magic remedy for a person to actually erase a memory? lol seems impossible :rollseyes

i thought the person meant to forget, get over the terrible feelings (of sadness, guilt or whatever), which is probably a good thing since that can be very distracing and make a person miserable

i think distraction is the best, and dua too for sure, and also coming to terms with the event that sparked the bad memory..
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syilla
09-13-2006, 09:10 AM
you can erase the memory?...

wow this look like our brain like a memory chip...
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Helena
09-13-2006, 09:12 AM
well my advice to u......wud be wotever the problem that caused to feel u to something or someone......its jus bury da past.....but lesson shud be taught...and never experince that again inshalah...if something is unislamic.....
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AnonymousPoster
09-13-2006, 09:13 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow

Deliberetly wanting to forget, is one of shaytans tools that drives us humans to seek the use of alcohol and/or drugs.

It is far better to have a good memory and pray to Allah(swt) for guidance and strength in handling our memories.
:sl:
thanks for the replies
its not a feeling a guilt which will lead me to alcohol ..........its like .......u have a thing or a situation ,but now u lost it ..........and I want to convince my self that it was not made for me .........the sooner the better.otherwise its almost impossible to get out of it .......ateast for me its like that .

And only pple who dont want to surrender to such situations can understand it .........its painful and its unavoidable at times.........
thats y I need ur help .........
if dua can make it ............then make dua for me ...........

I will be thankfull
:w:
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snakelegs
09-13-2006, 09:18 AM
since we are almost always chattering in our heads, this chatter can easily be replaced by something else. i would recommed that when this matter comes up, you immediately replace it by substituting that tape with a chant, a verse from the qur'an, etc.
this has worked for me in the past. hope it works for you.
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syilla
09-13-2006, 09:21 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
:sl:
thanks for the replies
its not a feeling a guilt which will lead me to alcohol ..........its like .......u have a thing or a situation ,but now u lost it ..........and I want to convince my self that it was not made for me .........the sooner the better.otherwise its almost impossible to get out of it .......ateast for me its like that .

And only pple who dont want to surrender to such situations can understand it .........its painful and its unavoidable at times.........
thats y I need ur help .........
if dua can make it ............then make dua for me ...........

I will be thankfull
:w:
you'll be in my dua :)
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IbnAbdulHakim
09-13-2006, 09:32 AM
:salamext:

read the story of abu mahjan !

heard this in a talk by Yahya Ibrahim

This is a story which gives hope to both you and me!


There was once a brave, strong, and poetic sahabi, he was pious and loved Allah and his messenger saws but he had one fatal flaw and that was drinking!! He was Abu Mahjan RA who embraced islam in the 9th year! He defended islam through his strength and poetry! But he was an alcoholic... he could not stop drinking! He was one of the most strongest sahabi, noone could stand up to him but he would be beaten!
Finally after trying much to get Abu Mahjan to stop his alcoholic habits he gave up and decided to exile Abu Mahjan RA and imprisoned him! However Abu Mahjan managed to escape and got away from his exile to return to his habits!
A battle broke out and all the mujahideen went to fight against the kuffar! Abu Mahjan being the mujahideen couldnt resist this opportunity to fight FI-SABILLILAH so he left to go to the battlefield!
However at this same time the letter of Umar RA reached Sa'd RA who was incharge of this battle, the letter read,

"Whenever you find Abu Mahjan TIE HIM UP and return him!"

Sa'd immediately noticed Abu Mahjan enter the battlefield and he grabbed him and tied him to a tree. Abu Mahjan looked all around, seeing the fierce fighting going on, how he regretted not being able to partake of such an honour! How he loved everything in the way of Allah yet such a great opportunity was passing him by. Then it dawned upon him, it is not these ropes that tie him to the tree, rather it is his habits, his sins! He immediately turned to Allah and sincerely repented! Then he shouted out, SOMEONE PLEASE RELEASE ME I HAVE REPENTED, ALLOW ME TO FIGHT FOR ALLAH!
Salma the wife of Sa'd hearing his plea felt sympathy and promised to release him but on the condition that, he either goes out and becomes martyred, or he ties himself back up. Abu Mahjan sed, WALLAHI I WILL EITHER BECOME A MARTYR FOR ALLAH OR I WILL MYSELF TIE MYSELF UP! so he was released and salma tied herself in his place to trick Sa'd who is likely to check!
Sa'd noticed a FURIOUS FIGHTER, toppling the enemy ranks, completely desecrating them! And he sed to himself "i would have sworn that is abu mahjan if i didnt tie him with my own hands!"

After the battle Abu Mahjan went and tied himself back up. Sa'd then went to check on him and found wounds all over Abu Mahjans bodies... cuts.. bruises... NO MUJAHIDEEN FIGHTS WIVOUT BEING HURT! Tears began to well up in Sa'ds eyes and they streamed, he decided to release Abu Mahjan on the condition that he will never drink again! Abu Mahjan said: "WALLAHI I WILL NEVER DRINK AGAIN".

:wasalamex
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جوري
09-14-2006, 01:32 AM
you can't forget anything... things just get easier with time.... I have lost a few people I loved... it was very painful... still is... I just learned to live with it... now I just wrap myself in the warm memories... or my mind makes the old memories really soft and romantic devoid of the intensity of hurt... though still there, so when I remember with all those thoughts that run through our head a million thought a day... I just make supplications or prayers and feel thankful for the gift of remembrance... everything is born small but gets bigger with time... except for pain... it is born so big and gets smaller with time... inshallah you will find solace soon.... keep with fast and prayer.... God is the best of friends...
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