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AnonymousPoster
10-09-2006, 09:29 PM
:sl: I am so upset.My brother today had a go at me for not being able to speak my language, been in england so long and i completly forgot my own language is embaressing as people from my country do and will continue giving me a hard time. He was just upset then he asked me what race are you going to marry?
I said whoever,I am an open mind person, I see religion not culture, He ate me alive for saying that..*Everyone sticks to they own root bla bla bla*.

Now hes going to talk to my whole family about it, which will embaress me a great deal. All this because I cant speak or dont really mind marrying other races. :cry: :cry:
:w:
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DigitalStorm82
10-09-2006, 09:34 PM
I don't see anything wrong with not being able to speak your native tongue... and especially nothing wrong with "open mind" when it comes to marriage.

You shouldn't be embarassed to express your opinions... In our slang term we call it "desi mentallity" so, sooner or later they will understand where you're coming from...

Make duah to Allah to keep you in his good graces... thats all that matters.

W'salaamz,
Hamid
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chacha_jalebi
10-09-2006, 09:38 PM
salaam

i suggest this site www.familytroubles.com :p

just stick up for yaself innit, if you cant speak the lingo, big deal :p your not gona get any reward from Allah (swt) for speakin a lingo :D. also dont let him get to ya find somethin he cant do and cuss him bout dat :p :D:D:D all the best :D:D:D
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rania2820
10-09-2006, 09:40 PM
there is nothing wrong with not being able to speak you mother tongue. i know many people who have spent so much time in America they can't remember anything from their mother tongue. there was one person i knew that was American but when they went to the middle east and stayed there for like 10 years.they had difficulties speaking English because they had not been in the states for so long.so don't feel bad about it.
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AnonymousPoster
10-09-2006, 09:42 PM
I know but where i am from they are so dumb subxanallah me and my dad just had a fight and i am looking to move away in a few months or next year cant live with them anymore:cry: Digital if only they all though like u:cry:
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chacha_jalebi
10-09-2006, 09:46 PM
Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
Digital if only they all though like u:cry:
erm erm aww chank u :p :D:D

anony jus be patient innit, because theres nothing wrong with not bein able to speak a lingo, and if you let them get to you then their will be arguments innit, jus toughen up :p and dont let them get to you :D:D innit and stick up for yourself and opinions :D:D:D

keep smilin :D
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Ibn Abi Ahmed
10-09-2006, 09:51 PM
:sl:

http://www.islamicboard.com/basics-i...s-sorrows.html

:w:
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DigitalStorm82
10-09-2006, 09:57 PM
Moving away wont solve anything... it'll only promote a distant family. As your parents grow older they'll need your support in many ways... and this will not help develop good bonds...

If you're a girl... You need a mahram to live with you... It is not recommended that you live alone... but its not an absolute must.

I suggest that you don't get all worked up over not being able to speak your native language and have arguments.

What is it that your parents are arguing about? What do they want you to do?

We should try to please our parents because Islam does ask us to treat them kindly and with respect. So, if they want you to take a course in your native language, I say you do it. Do it for the sake of Allah... as you're doing your best to please your parents and Allah.

The decision is of course yours... but I hope you understand that your parents have a great impact in your life and they have certain rights over you.... as you have rights over your parents.

Please make your decisions when you're not angry.

W'salaamz,
Hamid




























.
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bint_muhammed
10-10-2006, 08:00 PM
dont worry about it, i stammer in my native language plus its a very difficult language (pushtu)lol! i suprised your bruvs got views like that, i mean ok if your father does your bros arnt they suppose to be more (how do i put this)less cultured? (doesnt make sense does it?) even if you marry in culture you can marry someone who can speak english, dont fret over it! take care
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sonz
10-10-2006, 08:02 PM
u can relearn ur language if u want. if u once knew it will be easier to get it back

masalama
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united
10-10-2006, 08:20 PM
i do agree that you should try to make an effort to learn your own language. it isnt part of religion or anything but its a part of who you are. so many kids nowadays seem to "forget" their ethnic origin, but "hello!" what do you see when you look in the mirror?
but i also agree that who you marry does not have to speak your native language.
i think that a balance has to be achieved, dont forget who you are, but dont let it dominate your life so much either.
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Hijaabi22
10-10-2006, 09:27 PM
Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
:sl: I am so upset.My brother today had a go at me for not being able to speak my language, been in england so long and i completly forgot my own language is embaressing as people from my country do and will continue giving me a hard time. He was just upset then he asked me what race are you going to marry?
I said whoever,I am an open mind person, I see religion not culture, He ate me alive for saying that..*Everyone sticks to they own root bla bla bla*.

Now hes going to talk to my whole family about it, which will embaress me a great deal. All this because I cant speak or dont really mind marrying other races. :cry: :cry:
:w:
mannnnnn trrrrrrrrrust me u aint da only 1, I CAN BARELLLLLLLY speak my lingo man me chat crao half da tym
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S_87
10-11-2006, 12:12 PM
:sl:

i think you should ask him whats it to him if you cant speak a language and whats it to him if you marry a guy out of your culture.
if he does tell your parents then even though it may be hard for you speak your mind then. tell them. because then they WILL know. just say it.
and let your bro know that there are people from your background who can speak english perfectly well and you dont need to know if their extended cousins twice removed speaks it or not.
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anonymous
10-11-2006, 12:23 PM
sis get over it lol...

just do ur best 2 learn arabic language coz das essential to understnad your deen... and then do ur best 2 master ur culture langage coz das v important too.

notice majority of non arab scholars excelled in arabic as well as their native languages... so we should follow suit too :)

there's an EXCEPTION - arabic slang is not a native language!!!! LOL so yeh icnase ur one of those.

salamz
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nishom
10-11-2006, 12:27 PM
No worries.

I cant speak or understand my native tongue!!!!!-HELP!!!!-Its really tricky when someone talks to me in urdu, i just nod my head and say 'jee...jeee!!!!!'
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AvarAllahNoor
10-11-2006, 12:43 PM
Originally Posted by nishom
No worries.

I cant speak or understand my native tongue!!!!!-HELP!!!!-Its really tricky when someone talks to me in urdu, i just nod my head and say 'jee...jeee!!!!!'
lol - If you looked at me, you'd think 'i bet he can't speak punjabi' then most people judge you by the way you look. I can hold a converstaion in punjabi and many people are shocked, i sound like a proper desi when i switch to my lingo.(which doesn't happen very often may i add)
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Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
10-13-2006, 02:59 AM
same here! im surprised when i hear of ppl not being able to speak their native tongue. I'm getting pretty good at urdu cuz im alwaysss asking =D So all my aunts n cuzs r like " ur urdu is good" =P
Its no biggie realli! Learn it in ur spare time. InshAllah u will be fine =)
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Tania
10-13-2006, 04:47 AM
Are courses held in each schools and join them. There is language which could not be learned:)
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Al-Zaara
10-15-2006, 02:48 PM
:sl:

If you decide to try to learn your native language again, then inshallah, you'll succeed.

I myself have forgotten how to speak Turkish... It's embarressing, 'cause I love everything that has with Turkey or Turkish to do... AND it's part of who I am, my roots so to say, though my mother tongue is Albanian, I once could speak my "second mother tongue" (lol making up words, sorry..) Turkish too, but now... :(

Oh well, I will inshallah learn it again. It's not that hard.
You try it too. (To learn YOUR native language, not mine. lol):D

:w:
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SHAH G
10-17-2006, 09:47 AM
man i can't even speak my language and when i do for sum reason i add a bit of punjabi to my urdu and i'm uncle all ways makes fun out of me and tells me to watch urdu tv channels for sum reason so sumting gets in my head don't worry jus be good with your parents and you will pick ur language up soon inshallah
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anonymous
10-17-2006, 02:01 PM
OFFFFFF-TOPICCCCCCCCC! :p
ah tl him ta wake up n smel de cofee...jus av a BIG go @ him back
w/s wr wb
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Curaezipirid
10-17-2006, 02:32 PM
Among all the true believing Muslims no person can do better than to speak the tongue of the land they stand in and marry a person whom can accept their own responsiblity in Allah
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anonymous
10-17-2006, 02:34 PM
Er what, tongue of the land? Shkeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeno :p^o) ^o)
Blah blaah blah yaddy yaddy yadda....My post makes as much sense as yours does :p:p
Tc w/s and erm to the original topic starter...dont worry...have sabr and take it ez...keep krrrrrisp! l8aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaz
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Sabbir_1
10-19-2006, 10:46 PM
It aint really ur fault u dont know ur own language blame ur parents, cuz when u get bought up u hear ur lang age at home and so u pick up words from them..if u really want to learn ur lag then go back homr stay there for about a yr.. that should help trust me the kids speak like gronw ups there u'll learn something from them

anyway have a go back at ur bro for asking sypid questions like wjhat race u gonna marry? what a stupid question.. Marry whatever race u want..

If u wanna learn a language best language to learn will be arabic.. Language of the quran.

wasalaam.
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