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anonymous
12-02-2006, 05:35 PM
Salaams,

I need advise, or anyone's opinion in things that might have a connection, well:

these pass few days, weeks, months; I've been feeling really upset sad depressed, it occurs too often, i get really moody and sometimes sanp at my family members, not all is my fault cause they're just pouring water over fire aswell , at times.
I end up hatin' everything and everyone, Im natrually a person who keeps to themselves and is quite, I hate to socliaise, but I fear that maybe oneday i'll end up as this lonely old person! :cry:

I don't know how Im going to interact with my future spouse, I hope I dont drive that person away.

And also the death of my father has been hard on me, although he has been gone for quite a while now.
I try not to show how i feel out in the open, infront of everyone and end up crying alot by myself behind closed doors, but sometimes I can't prevent the tears ,and end up cryin anywhere if I remember him, even if it may be in the middle of the streets, as I write this now I can't help but wipe back the tears! :cry:

I don't know whether I'd ever get over the fact that he's dead?

Please help!!

- Anon.
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IbnAbdulHakim
12-02-2006, 05:50 PM
:salamext:

Ukhtee are you not happy with Allahs decision? :) Everyone has a time in which Allah has placed for the Angel of Death to take them away therefore we love all the people but we achnowledge that "They truelly BELONG to Allah swt". You know Rasullulah saws said that if anybody faces a calamity or a problem then let them think about his death and their problem will seem insignificant because honestly the nothing can compare to the loss of the man who we called "mercy to mankind" ! Ukhtee inshaAllah ta'ala you'll get to see your dad in jannah :D ! but this dunya is a test remember and ukhtee its suuuch a small time lol its nothing ! Its like less then a split second its not even worth the wing of a mosquito AND WITHOUT TWO WINGS A MOSQUITO CANT EVEN FLY !! subhanallah ukhtee put all your focus into aiming for the akhirah, its for the akhirah we strive.

Ukhtee i pray that Allah gives you sabr (patience) and i hope u get da best hubby inshaAllah ta'ala.

:wasalamex

ps: imagine seein ur loved one in jannatul firdaus in a palace beneath which rivers flow, its not too far away, we just gotta work for it :)
Reply

glo
12-02-2006, 06:51 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
Salaams,

I need advise, or anyone's opinion in things that might have a connection, well:

these pass few days, weeks, months; I've been feeling really upset sad depressed, it occurs too often, i get really moody and sometimes sanp at my family members, not all is my fault cause they're just pouring water over fire aswell , at times.
I end up hatin' everything and everyone, Im natrually a person who keeps to themselves and is quite, I hate to socliaise, but I fear that maybe oneday i'll end up as this lonely old person! :cry:

I don't know how Im going to interact with my future spouse, I hope I dont drive that person away.

And also the death of my father has been hard on me, although he has been gone for quite a while now.
I try not to show how i feel out in the open, infront of everyone and end up crying alot by myself behind closed doors, but sometimes I can't prevent the tears ,and end up cryin anywhere if I remember him, even if it may be in the middle of the streets, as I write this now I can't help but wipe back the tears! :cry:

I don't know whether I'd ever get over the fact that he's dead?

Please help!!

- Anon.
Yes, you will come to terms with your father's death - with time.

I don't know how long it is since your father passed away, but you need to be patient with yourself and allow time to go through the grieving process. Nobody can tell you how long that will take - but you will know.
And gradually the pain will lessen, and you will focus on other areas in your life again.

My father died when I was very young, and I must say that it took me years to fully come to terms with his death ...

Don't lose hope. Your feelings of pain, anger and sadness will gradually ease. You will not feel like this forever!!!

Peace :)
Reply

Sum-Muslim-Gal
12-02-2006, 07:33 PM
^^well said glo:D

yes sister its hard loosing someone you love i lost my father its been 6years..
its hard to let go but its the best thing to do..inshaAllah i pray that allah[swt] opens the doors of paradise ..:D

its a phase your going through sis it will eventually go away...

just strive and dont loose hope bad and good thngs happen in life for a reason..you just got to be patient..inshaAllah i hope evrything goes well for you dont worry..just trun to allah[swt] he is there he will listen to your calls where ever you are..open your heart to your Lord ...

sorry couldnt give your much of an advice done my best sis..:D:D

Wasalam
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anonymous
12-03-2006, 11:30 AM
Originally Posted by IbnAbdulHakim
:salamext:

Ukhtee are you not happy with Allahs decision? :) Everyone has a time in which Allah has placed for the Angel of Death to take them away therefore we love all the people but we achnowledge that "They truelly BELONG to Allah swt". You know Rasullulah saws said that if anybody faces a calamity or a problem then let them think about his death and their problem will seem insignificant because honestly the nothing can compare to the loss of the man who we called "mercy to mankind" ! Ukhtee inshaAllah ta'ala you'll get to see your dad in jannah :D ! but this dunya is a test remember and ukhtee its suuuch a small time lol its nothing ! Its like less then a split second its not even worth the wing of a mosquito AND WITHOUT TWO WINGS A MOSQUITO CANT EVEN FLY !! subhanallah ukhtee put all your focus into aiming for the akhirah, its for the akhirah we strive.

Ukhtee i pray that Allah gives you sabr (patience) and i hope u get da best hubby inshaAllah ta'ala.

:wasalamex

ps: imagine seein ur loved one in jannatul firdaus in a palace beneath which rivers flow, its not too far away, we just gotta work for it :)
Salaams,

Yes, I am happy with Allah's decision, and this is all what he decreed.. All Praise to Him, I'll never question why? Just extremely sad that's all. :-\

Thanx for the advice Bro'
Reply

Pk_#2
12-03-2006, 11:35 AM
AsalamuAlaykum,

It's a natural thing - anonymous,

I just pray Allah (swt) will help you and reward you throughout your difficult times,

Don't worry :)
Reply

anonymous
12-03-2006, 11:35 AM
Originally Posted by glo
Yes, you will come to terms with your father's death - with time.

I don't know how long it is since your father passed away, but you need to be patient with yourself and allow time to go through the grieving process. Nobody can tell you how long that will take - but you will know.
And gradually the pain will lessen, and you will focus on other areas in your life again.

My father died when I was very young, and I must say that it took me years to fully come to terms with his death ...

Don't lose hope. Your feelings of pain, anger and sadness will gradually ease. You will not feel like this forever!!!

Peace :)
Hi Glo,

Sorry to hear about your Father death.

You know I have been patient and ive been so for quite a while (couple of years now). but it jus feels like that it's hit home now! :offended: it's jus really sunk in.
I don't know maybe it's the fact that My Imaan has decreased, Allah knows best.
I hope to get over feelin' like this subhanallah as it is really tearing me apart.

Thanx for the advice glo
Reply

lolwatever
12-03-2006, 11:37 AM
Originally Posted by anonymous
Salaams,

Yes, I am happy with Allah's decision, and this is all what he decreed.. All Praise to Him, I'll never question why? Just extremely sad that's all. :-\

Thanx for the advice Bro'
may allah grant u patience sis, just remember that one day you will also endup in the grave (and so will we all), that will help you be more aware of your behaviour towards others n show more restraint inshaalh :)

all the best!! really sad to hear,

take care :w:
Reply

anonymous
12-03-2006, 11:38 AM
Originally Posted by Sum-Muslim-Gal
^^well said glo:D

yes sister its hard loosing someone you love i lost my father its been 6years..
its hard to let go but its the best thing to do..inshaAllah i pray that allah[swt] opens the doors of paradise ..:D

its a phase your going through sis it will eventually go away...

just strive and dont loose hope bad and good thngs happen in life for a reason..you just got to be patient..inshaAllah i hope evrything goes well for you dont worry..just trun to allah[swt] he is there he will listen to your calls where ever you are..open your heart to your Lord ...

sorry couldnt give your much of an advice done my best sis..:D:D

Wasalam
Lol you made me smile sister :) thanx alot.

may Allah give me more patience inshaallah

_BAsalamuAlaykum,

It's a natural thing - anonymous,

I just pray Allah (swt) will help you and reward you throughout your difficult times,

Don't worry
Ameen to your duaah!

Thanx sis
Reply

Pk_#2
12-03-2006, 11:39 AM
Ameen to the previous dua's

Barak Allah feeki, sis?

AsalamuAlaykum!
Reply

anonymous
12-03-2006, 11:40 AM
Originally Posted by lolwatever
may allah grant u patience sis, just remember that one day you will also endup in the grave (and so will we all), that will help you be more aware of your behaviour towards others n show more restraint inshaalh :)

all the best!! really sad to hear,

take care :w:
Ameen to the duaah,

thanx Lolly, that's a good way of putting it.
Reply

lolwatever
12-03-2006, 11:46 AM
Originally Posted by anonymous
Ameen to the duaah,

thanx Lolly, that's a good way of putting it.
no probs bro/sis, u called me lolly :D means i must hav cheered u up even a tiny weeny bit :D:D

take care, all the bestt!
salams :D
Reply

Sum-Muslim-Gal
12-03-2006, 03:14 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
Lol you made me smile sister :) thanx alot.

may Allah give me more patience inshaallah



Ameen to your duaah!

Thanx sis
salam

sis am glad I put a smile on ur face u put a smile on my face too ..:D:D:D

yes just be patient sis inshaAllah you'll come round it..:D:D

tackecare xxxx

wasalam
Reply

glo
12-04-2006, 08:55 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
Hi Glo,

Sorry to hear about your Father death.

You know I have been patient and ive been so for quite a while (couple of years now). but it jus feels like that it's hit home now! :offended: it's jus really sunk in.
I don't know maybe it's the fact that My Imaan has decreased, Allah knows best.
I hope to get over feelin' like this subhanallah as it is really tearing me apart.

Thanx for the advice glo
Greetings anon.

Although my father's death caused me much pain and grief, it also set my life on a path which ultimately led me to where I am now.
It contributed to me leaving home early, to me coming to the UK, and to me meeting my husband and raising my family - so I have much to thank God for!

Even now I sometimes wish I had known my father better, and that he could be here to share my life and know my husband and children ...
But it was not meant to be! And I have learned to accept that.

It wasn't an easy thing to do. Believe me I had my times of being angry and shouting at God for taking my father when I was so young - but God took me through those times.
I believe God understands our human emotions, and he is forgiving when we are angry with him. He guides and loves us anyway ...


I may not know who you are, anon, but you are in my thoughts anyway.

Peace :)
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