will a sis get offended?

[IbnAbdulHakim]

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

[Malaikah]

:sl:

Do you look like a Muslim? Silly question, but personally, I think if I can tell that you are a Muslim then I wouldn't be offended, but it is probably a good idea to say salam lol.

[FollowingAlhuda]

Well, i work to at an office. I don't work with (young) muslim men. I do talk without my will to my collegues. I don't even want to work in the first place, but because it's a course for school to learn the practical i have to. I don't even like my education, and love to stay home later to take care of my house husband and children Insha Allah.

If i did work with muslim men, i think i would be shy also and would rather ask help from a kafir then my muslim brother...it's just a discomfort...

But i guess this wasn't your question, i just thought i would place the girl's perspective..

Wa Allaho A3lem

wassalamo Aleikom Warahmato Allah Wabarakatoh

[Silver Pearl]

:wasalamex

Personally I wouldn’t get offended. Women are different from men, their mentally is very different. Something as simple as salaam could mean a whole different thing to them (So I have been told by a lot of sisters). You may utter the salaam beneath your breath or say it as she leaves to ensure there is no fitnah caused by it.

Actually I’d say the best time to say salaam is as she leaves, it makes matter much easier and you have done your duty to greet a fellow Muslim.
There is a chance that some sisters may be offended, they may get the impression that you don’t want to voice your identity as a Muslim. However, Allaah is your witness to what is in your heart so do what is best for your imaan rather then trying not to offend others. The shaytaan tries every tool in the world to put doubts into our minds. There have been many cases where brothers felt bad for not greeting sisters or vice versa and only fitnah came out of it as a result.

I hope I was helpful and Inshallaah all goes well :).

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

[FollowingAlhuda]

:sl:

Do you look like a Muslim? Silly question, but personally, I think if I can tell that you are a Muslim then I wouldn't be offended, but it is probably a good idea to say salam lol.

A man can say Salam. I read one day (Don't really remember where) that a woman cannot start with Salam.

Wallaho Ta'ala a3lem

[FollowingAlhuda]

:wasalamex

Personally I wouldn’t get offended. Women are different from men, their mentally is very different. Something as simple as salaam could mean a whole different thing to them (So I have been told by a lot of sisters). You may utter the salaam beneath your breath or say it as she leaves to ensure there is no fitnah caused by it.

Actually I’d say the best time to say salaam is as she leaves, it makes matter much easier and you have done your duty to greet a fellow Muslim.
There is a chance that some sisters may be offended, they may get the impression that you don’t want to voice your identity as a Muslim. However, Allaah is your witness to what is in your heart so do what is best for your imaan rather then trying not to offend others. The shaytaan tries every tool in the world to put doubts into our minds. There have been many cases where brothers felt bad for not greeting sisters or vice versa and only fitnah came out of it as a result.

I hope I was helpful and Inshallaah all goes well :).

Ahsanti Ukhti

May Allah reward you Insha Allah

[akulion]

thats not shyness bro
that just bad manners
Honestly if I saw a muslim and they didnt say salam to me or reply my salam I would really think they have no manners at all

When Allah has commanded for us to bid salam when we meet other muslims we MUST

So fulfil the commandment and bid salam to any muslim male or female when you see them insha'Allah. Its part of our good manners.

[Snowflake]

I think if there's going to be talk between muslims, then it must always start with saying salam. You're only giving duaa. If anyone is offended by receiving duaa, that's not your fault. Personally, I don't like it when people muslims start talking to each other without saying salam first.

Like if I go into a meat shop. I say "aslam alaikum - can I have 3lbs of chops please?" It doesn't have to be like "aslam alaikum, how are you, how's your day going..." etc etc.. A simple salam is good enuff.

[akulion]

saying of salam when conversing with a muslim is a commandment in the Quran

we as muslims must submit our views when there is a commandment present insha'Allah

there really should be no place for 'discussions and arguments' in these cases

just my 2 cents

[Malaikah]

A man can say Salam. I read one day (Don't really remember where) that a woman cannot start with Salam.

:sl:

I've never heard that before...:? Do you have any hadiths or something for that?

[lolwatever]

A man can say Salam. I read one day (Don't really remember where) that a woman cannot start with Salam.

Wallaho Ta'ala a3lem

:sl:
that's not true sis. the ruling is same for both ways. neways bak2topic..

:w:

ps: here's source: http://islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=39258&ln=eng

[Helena]

if a man..unknown man gave me salaam....dunno how i'd react....different women react diff ways..get diff understanding....u knw wt i mean...

well if sisters approach you...if they say salaam...could reply back and help them directly inshAllah...

if u approach them with salaam...would abit weird......

on the other hand salaam can be given to anybody...but depends on them how they take it.....

[Malaikah]

if a man..unknown man gave me salaam....dunno how i'd react....different women react diff ways..get diff understanding....u knw wt i mean...

:sl:

If it was just some stranger walking in the street and you and him where both alone, ok that would be weird, but the women have to talk to him anyway! It doesn't make sense that he has to talk to them to answer the question but he wouldn't say salam?:confused:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

thats not shyness bro
that just bad manners
Honestly if I saw a muslim and they didnt say salam to me or reply my salam I would really think they have no manners at all

When Allah has commanded for us to bid salam when we meet other muslims we MUST

So fulfil the commandment and bid salam to any muslim male or female when you see them insha'Allah. Its part of our good manners.

jazakAllah khair, big bro :) may Allaah help me rectify ma manners

[IbnAbdulHakim]

jazakAllah khair everyone :)

[Snowflake]

if a man..unknown man gave me salaam....dunno how i'd react....different women react diff ways..get diff understanding....u knw wt i mean...

well if sisters approach you...if they say salaam...could reply back and help them directly inshAllah...

if u approach them with salaam...would abit weird......

on the other hand salaam can be given to anybody...but depends on them how they take it.....

well.. approaching a brother just to say salam would be weird, but if your going to approach one - say in a shop etc and ask the price of sumthin, I think one should say salam first. Same goes for them too.

[FollowingAlhuda]

:sl:
that's not true sis. the ruling is same for both ways. neways bak2topic..

:w:

ps: here's source: http://islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=39258&ln=eng

Well you cannot say im wrong, because if you read the article, it's better not to greet when there is fitnah, so i guess i heard it for a part right.

[Helena]

erm am a lil confused here...is salaam giving to anybody acceptable in islam?..randomly anywhere...

with bro IbnAbdulHakim its understandable as his working..that is part of his job...

bu t for example weirdos on the street..unknown creeps approach you with the greetings of islam? is that unacceptable?.....his intentions may be utterly wrong...

[FollowingAlhuda]

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

Well,

read this insha Allah
http://fatwa-online.com/fataawa/wome...am/0021119.htm

[FollowingAlhuda]

erm am a lil confused here...is salaam giving to anybody acceptable in islam?..randomly anywhere...

with bro IbnAbdulHakim its understandable as his working..that is part of his job...

bu t for example weirdos on the street..unknown creeps approach you with the greetings of islam? is that unacceptable?.....his intentions may be utterly wrong...

If it wouldn't cause fitnah it's permissable,
read my last post, it's a fatwa of Sheikh Abdulaziz Bin-Baz.

Look at his first point

[Helena]

shukran sis...read ur article.way way clear..alhamdulilah..

its understandable and acceptable if a salaam is given that dsnt revolve around fitnah....

[IbnAbdulHakim]

i read that fatwa... i at times have to interact with the opposite gender... but i just work with two guys MAINLY, but times do differ...

[AnonymousPoster]

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

Wa Alaykum As salaam,

I don't know about everyone else, but I have way more respect for brothers who do what you just stated MashaAllah.
Directly answering their questions without any chit chat (which) could lead to God knows what!?) ... seems to be the wiser way to Go! :thumbs_up
I personally would'nt be offended! It puts a smile on my face when i see people commited to their deen, as i don't come across that much wallaahul musta'aan.

It also isn't Waajib/Obligatory for you to start off with giving them the salaams, but is it sunnah. So leaving that off won't make you sinful.
But it's waajib for you to return their salaams when they give it to you.

And Allah knows best.

[Malaikah]

Directly answering their questions without any chit chat (which) could lead to God knows what!?)

But saying salam isn't chit chat?!:confused: I don't get why he can;t say salam in the same way he answers the question? Saying salam doesn't mean he has to do it in a 'chit chat' type of way...:muddlehea

It also isn't Waajib/Obligatory for you to start off with giving them the salaams, but is it sunnah. So leaving that off won't make you sinful.

I thought it was waajib?:confused:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

But saying salam isn't chit chat?!:confused: I don't get why he can;t say salam in the same way he answers the question? Saying salam doesn't mean he has to do it in a 'chit chat' type of way...:muddlehea

i can say it... im just a fish, inshaAllaah i will from now on!

I thought it was waajib?:confused:

its obligatory to respond to salaam but not to extend it first... Allahu a'lam

[lolwatever]

^^ maybe she means to the opp gender?

its a sign of end of time that ppl stop saying salam 2 only those they know...

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^^ maybe she means to the opp gender?

its a sign of end of time that ppl stop saying salam 2 only those they know...

but i say salam to like every brother i see...

[aqonsi]

i really don't understand the problem, if ur saying salam to kafirs of the opposite sex, then whats the big deal with our lovely sisters?

[SUMMAYAH]

I think your doing just fine brother. Keep it up.
If the sister has a good head on her shoulders, she wouldn't be offended.

[Skillganon]

I think it is the manner you say salam these day.

e.g. If you going to say it in somekind of alluring voice and or flash you eye lashes.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

I think it is the manner you say salam these day.

e.g. If you going to say it in somekind of alluring voice and or flash you eye lashes.

you got that from ziaullah khan didnt you :p

[Umar001]

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

Wa Aleykum Salam Wa Rhametulahi Wa Berekatu,

Akhi, wait a second, do they say salam to you?

Also, have you read about the conditions some give about saying salam to sisters?

[IbnAbdulHakim]

Wa Aleykum Salam Wa Rhametulahi Wa Berekatu,

Akhi, wait a second, do they say salam to you?

Also, have you read about the conditions some give about saying salam to sisters?

only the niqaabis say salaam and i say salaam back but normal ones dont... and ye ive read the conditions. I know how it works i just wanted to know if the sisters wud get offended if i didnt say salaam, its hard man but inshaALlaah i will from now on

[Malaikah]

Also, have you read about the conditions some give about saying salam to sisters?

:sl:

I'm so confused!!! Aren't the conditions assuming that he isn't going to talk to them in the first place?! But he is talking to them! Why is it ok for him to answer their questions but not to say salam?:confused:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

:sl:

I'm so confused!!! Aren't the conditions assuming that he isn't going to talk to them in the first place?! But he is talking to them! Why is it ok for him to answer their questions but not to say salam?:confused:

i think you guys are really misunderstanding my question. Im aware of the halal and haram, i just wanted to know if i am offending sisters or not....

[Malaikah]

^I understood you, but I don't understand everyone else acting like it is haram?!:confused:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

omg another sis just came and left and i didnt even salaam her, man make dua 4 me!!!!!! i jus gave her a piece of paper didnt say anything at all !!!

and she mumbled something as she left, prob thinkin "punk didnt salaam me with his beard n everything, whats the point"


had to let this OUT!!!

[Sabbir_1]

omg another sis just came and left and i didnt even salaam her, man make dua 4 me!!!!!! i jus gave her a piece of paper didnt say anything at all !!!

You probbaly forgot.. say salaam if you see her again.



How many sis u got at you work place man, if its the same sis that keeps saying salalm. more than once than don'nt reply back..but if the sis says salaam once than reply back,, sis gets easily offended over small matters, so best to reply but no need to look at them at says salaam..

[FollowingAlhuda]

omg another sis just came and left and i didnt even salaam her, man make dua 4 me!!!!!! i jus gave her a piece of paper didnt say anything at all !!!

and she mumbled something as she left, prob thinkin "punk didnt salaam me with his beard n everything, whats the point"

had to let this OUT!!!

I would think Masha Allah, good brother and not be offended al all, because i think further an try to put myself in others conditions...

You will have my dua Insa Allah

[netprince]

You have to talk to all these people anyway as part of your job. You say salam, whether they respond or not is up to them. Its funny, we can spend a whole day talking to women as part of our working life. Where i work, i do have to work with women quite often, these could be colleagues, external consultants, trainers etc. Wheres the logic in not saying Salam to the muslims i work with?? (I have worked on occasions with muslim women and i do always say salam and they have always responded). You dont have to look at every woman as an object of desire, you can see a muslim and see a 'sister' a mother and aunt.

....and thats my two pence worth.

Increase the peace!!!

[IbnAbdulHakim]

increase the peace :D lol nice rhyme

jazakAllah khair

khalil its a university, tons of diff sisters....

[Umar001]

i think you guys are really misunderstanding my question. Im aware of the halal and haram, i just wanted to know if i am offending sisters or not....

Then I dont get what your worried about, if you know the halal and haram, then do the halal avoid the haram, if you offend anyone then its not your fault.

Its like saying 'do I have to apologise to a non muslim who asks me to come and worship his god because he might be offended.'

[IbnAbdulHakim]

its not sinful to offend sisters? :eek:

[FollowingAlhuda]

You have to talk to all these people anyway as part of your job. You say salam, whether they respond or not is up to them. Its funny, we can spend a whole day talking to women as part of our working life. Where i work, i do have to work with women quite often, these could be colleagues, external consultants, trainers etc. Wheres the logic in not saying Salam to the muslims i work with?? (I have worked on occasions with muslim women and i do always say salam and they have always responded). You dont have to look at every woman as an object of desire, you can see a muslim and see a 'sister' a mother and aunt.

....and thats my two pence worth.

Increase the peace!!!

Good point but the scholars agree that if the sister or brother is fitnah it's better for you to not say Salam. And if they do, say it back..

[Umar001]

its not sinful to offend sisters? :eek:

uh?

Well if they are being offended because of something Islamic then its not your fault, its like saying someone might be offended because you have a beard. Well thats not your fault.

Love you for the sake of Allah :happy:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

uh?

Well if they are being offended because of something Islamic then its not your fault, its like saying someone might be offended because you have a beard. Well thats not your fault.

Love you for the sake of Allah :happy:

lol may Allaah love you for it :)

[FollowingAlhuda]

uh?

Well if they are being offended because of something Islamic then its not your fault, its like saying someone might be offended because you have a beard. Well thats not your fault.

Love you for the sake of Allah :happy:

exactly they shouldn't feel offended by an Islamic deed...

May Allah ease it for you

Wassalam

[Snowflake]

I just remembered something. Shouldn't the one who approaches another say salam first?

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ does that apply to opposite genders?

[Snowflake]

found this inshaAllah..

the Prophet (sws) is reported to have said:
The young shall say salam to the old, the one who is walking shall say it to the sitting and a small group shall say it to a large one. (Bukhari: No. 6234)

So I guess it applies to both.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

is it ok to just guess that :eek: ?

*im sry if im being annoying*

[Snowflake]

ur not being annoying at all..

Let's look at it like this..

there's no need to say salam aloud to strangers you pass by in the street. After all, salam is a duaa and one can say it in the heart. Allah says we should make duaa for each other. So as long as Allah hears it then it's ok. My logic :X


but if any person, (bro/sis) approaches the opposite with intention to talk then they should address them with salam first. it's good manners. I mean how is it wrong to say salam if your going to talk to them anyway.

hope that makes sense..

[Snowflake]

oh, another thing..

say at work I am approached by a muslim brother, I'd respect him for giving salam before saying what he's gotto say. I'd just think that he is well aware of the islamic etiquette of giving salam. Also when we say salam we are reminded of our duty as muslims, and it serves as a reminder to behave with modesty.

I mean it'd be so hypocritical if a guy approached a sister, said salam then asked for her #. :-\

[IbnAbdulHakim]

jazakAllah khair, great advice mashaAllaah.

[Snowflake]

wa iyyakum

[Umar001]

ur not being annoying at all..

Let's look at it like this..

there's no need to say salam aloud to strangers you pass by in the street. After all, salam is a duaa and one can say it in the heart. Allah says we should make duaa for each other. So as long as Allah hears it then it's ok. My logic :X

I disagree, there is a need to say it aloud, because we are told to Spread the Salam, and also, it was shown to us as being a way to increase love between each other.

[Snowflake]

U think we should say it aloud to brothers and sisters we're walking past in the street? I don't think that's appropriate.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ same here...

[Helena]

a women saying it out loud salaam in the street is unappropriate.......as we should be modest inshAllah....

but bro habs...its not appropriate.....

[AnonymousPoster]

As Salaamu Alaykum,


Allah A'lam but ive never heard about giving salaams from the heart!?

I agree with those who say, it must be said out loud , but for the women it should be just loud enough for the person to hear.

[FBI]

:sl:

I just ignore sisters walking down the street :D

[youngsister]

:sl: No brother i wouldnt get offended:)
People have abused the Salam so much, kinda sad:(:w:

[Snowflake]

:sl:

I just ignore sisters walking down the street :D

That's good mashaAllah.

Also imagine walking down a busy street in a muslim area/country, you'd be like
"aslam alaikum." to the left
"aslam alaikum." to the right
"aslam alaikum." to the left
"aslam alaikum." to the right

literally giving salam every single second.. that'd be so weird :rolleyes:

As Salaamu Alaykum,
Allah A'lam but ive never heard about giving salaams from the heart!?

hehe, neither have I. But salam is a duaa. So we can make duaa in our hearts if we pass the opposite gender on the street. No need to let them hear it. Allah's the One who's going to accept the duaa, not the listener. :D

I agree with those who say, it must be said out loud , but for the women it should be just loud enough for the person to hear.

OK then, imagine passing a non practicing muslim brother and saying salam to him. He could take it in any way. He'll prob be like "Yo, what's up babe?... oh wa alaikum aslam btw." :offended:

It definitely isn't appropriate, or a necessity. :)

[IbnAbdulHakim]

i actually know muslims who do that salaam to the left n right stuff, lol it warms the heart :D

[seeker_of_ilm]

:sl:

I never make Salam to Muslim sisters I see, I find it much more appropriate to say "Whats the dealio?" or "Whats the happy-haps?"



























Seriously though, I don't make Salam to them.

:w:

[tomtomsmom]

what about non-muslims saying it to muslims?

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ we'll reply with "and upon you"

[tomtomsmom]

so it isn't offensive? i ask this because my husband is muslim so i very often meet muslims through him. i always feel strange saying it like it is wrong for me to do so i don't. plus it sounds very strange with my accent

[IbnAbdulHakim]

lol not at all, if you wish peace upon someone nothing wrong with it, would be nicer if you done it as a muslim though lol

[Snowflake]

^lol inshaAllah!!!

[Muslim Woman]

I seek refuge in Allah (The One God) from the Satan (devil) the cursed, the rejected

With the name of ALLAH (swt) -The Bestower Of Unlimited Mercy, The Continously Merciful


Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh (May the peace, mercy and blessings of Allah be upon you)


&&&

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

I think , it's ok to give Salaam but make sure that it does not create any chance to start personal talks rather than religion & compu :okay:

[anonymous]

Assalamu Alaikum

If you look like a Muslim and have the intention to say salaams or feel that you should be saying it, then why don't you say it?

The best way I found brothers (those who I have great respect for) saying it in a way that doesn't seem flirtatious or give a sister the wrong idea (seriously though, some girls need to stop misinterpreting such simple things), is by say it seriously and without out looking at the sister (i.e. lowering their gaze or looking at their work).

For example, since you work infront of a computer, I suppose you can tell when someone comes up to your desk without having to look up, its probably better to keep your eyes on the screen as you say salaams while looking serious, or "into your work" and then you can work with the client (give salaams then ask how you can help them to avoid any side discussions) rather than look, feel shy saying it, and have it get misinterpreted.

Salaams are free rewards lol, although it is up to you to say them or not, but its better to go one way or the other, because if you say it to some sisters and don't to others, it'll seem like your favoring some over others.

Allahu a'lem

As long as you keep your intentions clean inshallah, don't worry bout what they think lol..girls think too much nonesense anyways

fi aman allah
w'salaam

[sevgi]

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

naaaa...unless they have feelings for you, i doubt that they will be offended. so, just do ur job...but dnt forget the importance of saying salams to mulsims.and it is the job of a male bro to say salams to a sis. its a bit wrong for a sis to walk up n say salams dnt u think?

take it easy...the sis's proabaly arent even noticing...but me personally, i would feel a lot more welcome and comfortable if u say salams coz u no u can trust a muslim brother.:) (inshallah)

[IbnAbdulHakim]

jazakAllah khair, so by the reply of everyone im deducing that no-one else really feels shy to salaam the opposite gender. lol great now i think im just weird...

anyway im gonna try salaaming a lot more now (as anony said, wiv gaze down inshaAllaah)

:salamext: wa barakAllaahu feek

[sevgi]

yes gaze down..

and u shud feel shy...u'll jst get used to it but u should, even then, still feel shy...ur stepping out of ur comfort zone...just try doing it with modesty.

:w:

[SUMMAYAH]

feeling shy is a sign of a good charactor.

[habiibti]

I personally wouldnt have gotten offended but i see why some sister would.it is rude to ignore another muslim fellow and that might offend them.but if u think da salams might or have a chance of creating fitnah in ur heart or their,please Allah more and dont worry abt how they feel.never please people and displease Allah.

[anonymous]

:salamext:

well i work at helpdesk and often sisters etc come for computer help i help em wiv gaze down hardly any talk etc etc but for some reason im always shy to say salaam to em, i mean weneva they ask a question its like i directly answer that question and thats it, nothing more. im thinking if that was you as a sister would you be offended? :? :? :? (been thinkin this for too long so thought let me ask inshaAllaah)

no way wud i get offended in fact id be biggin u up 4 bein so modest :)

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl: I personally would not get offended.....

but I believe it is a sign of good manners to say salaam...with a non-Muslim wouldnt you say hello...? they probably would and you would answer too wouldnt you? in the same way I think you should begin with Salaam....

ok..maybe shyness is a good thing....but why should you be shy to spread peace...? :w:

[Re.TiReD]

:sl: ^^^^^^

http://www.islamicboard.com/general-...ng-salaam.html


:w:

[jihaadu nafs]

i have heard that When a strange [i.e. non-mahram] women greets a man with salam, he should answer her verbally loud enough for her to hear if she is an elderly women. However, if she is a younger women he should respond within himself. Likewise, when a man greets a [non-mahram] women with salam, the ruling would be the same alahu yaclam,
i have also heard you shouldnt say salam to a non mahram but if they say it to you then you must replay back in a low voice so that they can at least hear you. but allah knows best.

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl: I've never thought about that before :offended: like today I walked into a bookshop....its opened new round my area....should I have walked in in complete silence and not said salaam to the brother? it would have been rude to ignore him would it not?

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

As a sis i wont get offended atall.
I have the same problem.i am too shy to say salaam to non mahrems
( esp when i have to say salaam to male cousins and uncles). My mom thinks i am a wierd girl :rolleyes: .

Sis Muslimah gave some good advice there . MashaAllah she is always like that :shade: .

I am currently studying at uni. I dont drop in salaam right, left, and center to men, when i am going down the stairs, or going from one lecture room to the other. But yes, i do say salaam to all the girls, whom i know as well as those whom i dont know. Alhumdulillah everyone here is muslim, but people(both genders) these days think that if somebody from the opposite gender says salaam to them , they are interested in them. Astagfirullah :uuh: If girls can misinterpret salaam, boys can do that too.

When i have to ask something from my male teachers, about tests, or assignments etc, i take a friend of mine along with me, and as i have to talk to him , so i start with salaam.Its like
"May i come in, sir." "Assalamualaikum sir" "If you are not busy, i had to ask about the lecture". And yes with my gaze down.And ask what i wanted to know and then saying Thankyou i leave. I will be adding Assalamualaikum in the end.

Its not a chit chat like Assalamualaikum, how are you, the weather seems to be nice :D <---- Not in that way .

MashaAllah akhee, i really appreciate your shyness.

:sl:

[atha]

Hehehe! I do not get it. What the deal man! Just say your salaam to the sister. It is not like you are going to flirt with them or something. Jee! some men. Does a man thinks differntly than a woman when he is about to say salaam to her. Maybe you are shy because (maybe) you are single. Are you single brother. This shyness might be pointing to something completely different. Prophet would not have hesitated in saying salaam inshaAllah.

take care
Assalam-u-alaikum

[islamirama]

It all depends i say. I would say salaam to a sister if i went to a store she runs, but never to her if i ran into one at the market (unless necessary). Likewise, i wouldn't say salam to her at the masjid (unless needed).

why?
First the sister herself and then cuz of the community. For her it's ok if a non-muslim guy says "hi" to her and she'll galdy reply back. But if a Muslim guy to say "salam" there's that suspicion of "ulterior motives", and the same goes with the community. if you were to say salam, everybody start wondering if you're interested in the sister.

so just cuz of the mentality of the opposite gender and community, they feel secure saying "hi" to non-muslims.

[Snowflake]

=Anonymous Tester;646815]:sl:
Sis Muslimah gave some good advice there . MashaAllah she is always like that :shade: .

loq thank you :-[ :-[ :-[

When i have to ask something from my male teachers, about tests, or assignments etc, i take a friend of mine along with me, and as i have to talk to him , so i start with salaam.Its like
"May i come in, sir." "Assalamualaikum sir" "If you are not busy, i had to ask about the lecture". And yes with my gaze down.And ask what i wanted to know and then saying Thankyou i leave. I will be adding Assalamualaikum in the end.

Its not a chit chat like Assalamualaikum, how are you, the weather seems to be nice :D <---- Not in that way .

MashaAllah akhee, i really appreciate your shyness.

A perfect example there mashaAllah :thumbs_up

Keeping the gaze down when saying salam is excellent. InshaAllah, saying it this way, combined with a flat tone of voice and keeping the rest of the convo (if followed) business-like, a salam wouldn't be taken the wrong way.

[AmarFaisal]

Assalamoalaikum,
When I was working we had no men at work and suddenly then we had a few men teachers hired for boys section at school and in addition they were Pakistanis too. So If an Islamic religion teacher passed by us, he'd run along as if he never saw us. If the Pakistani teachers(men) passed by they'd always like to say Assalamoalaikum Ma'am or Ms... how r u? and go on with their work.

First I found it terrible, then I got used to it but then I had this sick feeling that my husband is looking at me from somewhere, when I talked to a male teacher...hehehehe

Anyways, at his work he has to shake hands with Lebanese Women whether muslims or chirstians. Coz Most of Lebanese Muslims r much like Christians. Some Muslim ladies also kiss men on their cheeks while saying salam and shaking hand!!!!!!!!!!

[Snowflake]

First I found it terrible, then I got used to it but then I had this sick feeling that my husband is looking at me from somewhere, when I talked to a male teacher...hehehehe

;D

Anyways, at his work he has to shake hands with Lebanese Women whether muslims or chirstians. Coz Most of Lebanese Muslims r much like Christians. Some Muslim ladies also kiss men on their cheeks while saying salam and shaking hand!!!!!!!!!!

:omg: :uuh:

May Allah give them hidayah

[Musalmaan]

:salamext:

Two exciting stories, insha'Allah, how much guidance is in their in following the sunnah especially a forgotten sunnah "lowering the gaze infront of non-mahram"

“There was a companion of ours in Glasgow who became ill and was hospitalized. He was admitted for three days and on the fourth day the attendant nurse said, “Marry me”. He [the brother in Glasgow] asked, “Why? I am a Muslim, you and I cannot become companions.” She said, “I’ll become Muslim”. “What’s the reason?” it was asked. She said, “In all my time that I have served in hospitals, except you, I have never seen a man lower his gaze in front of a woman.” “In my life you are the first person who lowers his gaze when seeing a woman.” “I come, and you close your eyes. Such great modesty can be taught by none other than a true religion.” The protection of one’s gaze entered Islam in her. She became Muslim. They both got married. By now, that girl has become the means of bringing so many other girls into Islam. How many of the women there have become Muslim.”

[Mawlana Tariq Jamil]

“This time when I went for Hajj, a young man had come there from Italy. He was from the lineage of Sayyiduna Hasan رضى الله عنه and was a local of Marrakesh. Out of necessity he had been living in Italy. At the age of twenty two he got all the Muslims in Italy moving.

Three hundred mosques have been built, when there had been none. And he had brought with him seventy young men to Hajj. So immense is the power given by Allah to Muslims. He wasn’t an ‘Aalim [Scholar]. … But the way he brought there [in Italy] this effort to life, he became the means for the construction of three hundred mosques, and a means for thousands of young Muslims to make tawba [repentance].

So this is your work, your responsibility. I neither say, become a member of the Tablighi Jamat, nor am I inviting you to any other group. [What I say is]: Me and you, all of us become the servants of Allah and His Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم, and become those who spread to others this servitude. And in spreading it whatever hardships we may face, we bear for the Pleasure of Allah. From al-Kawthar, the Beloved of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم, with his own hands, will give to drink. All sorrows and pain will leave. There will be a call there: “Where are my last Ummatis? When the Deen was being erased, they were the ones who embraced it and conveyed my message and spread it.””

[Mawlana Tariq Jamil]

found in here

[Snowflake]

Subhan'Allah! Beautiful stories. JazakAllah khairan for sharing.