Money and getting married

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

A brother's got e.g. £100 to spend on a wedding, mahr + walima.

The woman's family wants £100 in mahr alone and so on.

They even suggested taking a loan.

Interest loans are not possible. And the brother does not want to be debt anyway, to a bank or family members.

Should the brother just leaves this proposal if the family won't adhere to his budget.

[strider]

Surely, lending money from a family member without interest is better than taking out an interest-based loan. Sometimes, we can't make it on our own and if the brother is serious about marrying the sister then maybe he should consider this option.

[AnonymousPoster]

His parents would have to borrow money to help him out.

And his relatives aren't that well off either.

Part of the appeal of this woman was that she would be "easy" to marry and her family are compromising. Looks like that may not be true.

If the brother is troubled by debts and is stressed, how would his wife then feel? Don't a lot of marriages/relationships end because of money issues?

The mahr the brother is offering is enough to support her for three months. She's not from a "richer" family, she's from a slightly poorer background compared to the brother.

[Skillganon]

Is this in India or in the UK?

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[Malaikah]

:sl:

Can't he pay only part of the mahr upfront, and pay the rest later, when he can afford it? :?

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

Can't he pay only part of the mahr upfront, and pay the rest later, when he can afford it? :?

:w:
Yes he can do that..

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

That's still a debt though...

Part of the family is treating her like a product, like they are selling her.

[S_87]

:sl:

put the marriage on hold and save up some money?

[Snowflake]

The brother should tell her family of his problems. She won't need the mahr immediately as he'll be supporting her. If they agree to him paying it later, or part of it later then good. But if they insist on it being paid upfront then they are not really v. sensitive to others problems are they?

[Umar001]

:sl:

A brother's got e.g. £100 to spend on a wedding, mahr + walima.

The woman's family wants £100 in mahr alone and so on.

They even suggested taking a loan.

Interest loans are not possible. And the brother does not want to be debt anyway, to a bank or family members.

Should the brother just leaves this proposal if the family won't adhere to his budget.

Pay the mahr with that money!

I dont see what you have to spend on the weding! If they are all islamic they will just have the weding in front of the witnesses in the masjid which will not cost anything insha'Allah.

Then on top of that the Walima can be dates or something just invite a couple of friends and give dates and milk which I think is sufficient.

That should cover all costs, the best walimas are the least expensive.

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

I dont see what you have to spend on the weding! If they are all islamic they will just have the weding in front of the witnesses in the masjid which will not cost anything insha'Allah..

Brother, i know you are not joking, but in some parts of the world it is not implemented imsad especially in asian culture.

By what you say, marriage seems so affordable but thats not the case everywhere. :'(

:w:


p.s. thts not the original poster.

[brother_rk]

:sl:

A brother's got e.g. £100 to spend on a wedding, mahr + walima.

The woman's family wants £100 in mahr alone and so on.

They even suggested taking a loan.

Interest loans are not possible. And the brother does not want to be debt anyway, to a bank or family members.

Should the brother just leaves this proposal if the family won't adhere to his budget.

Salam,

I think the brother should remain patient until he can afford a bit more. InshAllah with patience he will either make the extra money to afford the marriage, or he the woman's parents will see it fit to help them out. Either way, beginning a marriage in debt is not a good idea.

Patience and prayers. This is the key :)

...and this is my input.

Salam.

[Umar001]

:sl:

Brother, i know you are not joking, but in some parts of the world it is not implemented imsad especially in asian culture.

By what you say, marriage seems so affordable but thats not the case everywhere. :'(

:w:


p.s. thts not the original poster.

Lol believe me I know, Im a guy thats gonna get married one day I know all about the rubbish of having a huge hall and so forth.

I hate it, rreally really gets on my nerves.