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AnonymousPoster
03-28-2007, 08:45 PM
Salam Today I had A Low Day I Cried For Three Hours Straight And Did Not Even Know Why, Well I looked At My Self And The Low Self Esteem Issues Came Up Again.
It Was Never As Bad As Today I Though ToMyself Maybe I should Just Go On Anti Depressant. 17 And On Anti Dep. Not Good At All.
My Friend Would Tell Me Look At Those Who Are Suffering!
But All I Can See Are Those Who Are Beautiful.Why Didn`t Allahswt Make Me Like That?
Selfish? Very. Why Am I Suffering Like This? Is It Because Of My Previous Sins? When Am Lying In Bed At night All I hear Is You Will Never Marry You Are Hidious I Feel Low Sometime I Want To Hide Away And Never Leave.:cry:
I Trust My Fellow Muslims Brothers And Sisters And I Am Relying On You For Help May Allah SwT BleSs You.
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Pk_#2
03-28-2007, 08:51 PM
AsalamuAlaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,

You think Allah (Swt) didn't make you beautiful?

We are all beautiful in our own way! Some have big eyes, some round cheeks lol etc

It may also be that you have something much better stored for you in the afterlife.

InshaAllah!

You shouldn't feel depressed if you are doing sufficent prayers dhikr etc

May Allah guide us to the straight path, and keep us steadfast in our obligatory duties! Ameen.
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AnonymousPoster
03-28-2007, 09:00 PM
Ameen.You See One Of The Reason I Dont Tell People Or Even Try To Sort This Out Is Because Of Their Reaction. It Might Seem Like Nothing But When You Have A Very Low Self Esteem Esteem It Can Make Your Life Hell Paranoia Hits You
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jzcasejz
03-28-2007, 09:05 PM
So This Basically Is About Looks And Self-Esteem? Well, Regarding What Your Friend Has Said, He/She Is Right. Don't Try Focus On What You Haven't Got...But Rather Realise We Are Very Much Privileged With What We Have Got. :) There Is So Much We Can Be Thankful For Towards Allaah.

And About The Marriage Thing...Who Know's What The Future Holds? Just Keep Your Faith In Allaah. I Hope Everything Goes Well For You. :)

n btw...for those tinkin i posted dis thread...itz not me koz im 16! :blind:
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Pk_#2
03-28-2007, 09:05 PM
Your life can't be hell! Don't even say that, your typing on a compurter right now, there are many who are not clothed or fed :'(

Hell his unimaginable, May Allah (Swt) save us from the torment of the hellfire.

Just think about all the great things Allah (Swt) has given you.

AsalamuAlaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.
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The Ruler
03-28-2007, 09:07 PM
:sl:

hey, i know i wont win the next title of miss universe, but i still know that im beautiful...(not literally)...but in my own way...ok, i admi...im weird...but i ike myself because of that...and that's what you ought to do...look for something good in you, something that will make you proud of yourself.

try to look at your inside (if your outside is an issue i.e. you dont find yourself attractive)...i'm sure you'll find something :)

Where there is Islam, there is naturally no scope of Satan to penetrate and exercise its influence. It must fly from that place. Sahih Muslim

:w:
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nevesirth
03-28-2007, 09:10 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
Ameen.You See One Of The Reason I Dont Tell People Or Even Try To Sort This Out Is Because Of Their Reaction. It Might Seem Like Nothing But When You Have A Very Low Self Esteem Esteem It Can Make Your Life Hell Paranoia Hits You
salmalykm rhmatlhi wa brkthu, y do u have a low self esteem? is it because of ur physical appearance, or is ur low self esteem caused by the opinions of others? the truth is tht some pple who majority consider as attractive hv low self esteem because of certain flaws only them can recognise. plus wht pple consider as beauty also varies. cheer up ukthi.
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IbnAbdulHakim
03-28-2007, 09:10 PM
:salamext:

in islam we are encouraged to look at those who have less then us in wordly affairs and look to those who have more in terms of ilm/good deeds so we can strive to be like them.

appearance isnt necessary in dunya sister because you'll have it and much more in akhirah!

dont worry, keep pracitisin your deen, i pray you get the best husband and i pray you get to jannah.


low self esteem... lol check out yassir fazaga's self image pysocology, let me link you!!


Yassir Fazaga
Self Image Psychology
[/CENTER]




Self Image Psychology expounds on some of the harmful messages promoted by the western media. The speaker points out how these common messages damage the Muslims’ self-image psychology.

Among the many things discussed in this presentation are examples of proper self-respect and self-reverence from the lives of the Companions of the Prophet Muhammad (sal Allaahu alayhi waSalam).
In addition, the speaker mentions common acts that entail lack ofself esteem, such as the changing of Muslim names to non Muslim ones and the changing of the Islamic identity in general. The mere nature of this discussion reveals how Muslims today really view themselves.

Download: [Right Click - Save Target As/Save Link As]
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Pk_#2
03-28-2007, 09:18 PM
AsalamuAlaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,

^^ quit making assumptions that Anon is a sister.

Check this out:

Three Types of People
The ancients were aware of the spiritual diseases of the heart, and this is certainly at the essence of the Islamic teaching. One of the first things the Quran does is define three types of people: the mu'minun, the kafirun, and the munafiqun. The mu'minun are people whose hearts are alive while the kafirun are people whose hearts are dead. The munafiqun are people who have a disease or a sickness in their hearts; thus, Allah subhanahu wa t'ala says,"In their hearts is a disease, and they were increased in their disease." This is also in accordance with another verse: "When their hearts deviated, Allah made them deviate further." When somebody turns away from Allah subhanahu wa t'ala, Allah subhanahu wa t'ala causes them to deviate even further from the truth.


May Allah (swt) Make us among the mu'minun! Ameen
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AnonymousPoster
03-28-2007, 09:19 PM
Thank You For Taking Time To Reply

salmalykm rhmatlhi wa brkthu, y do u have a low self esteem? is it because of ur physical appearance, or is ur low self esteem caused by the opinions of others?
Yes It Is Because Of My Physical Appearance I Am Unhappy With it.
People Dont Call Me Ugly But I Know They Are Thinking It.

hey, i know i wont win the next title of miss universe, but i still know that im beautiful...(not literally)...but in my own way...ok, i admi...im weird...but i ike myself because of that...and that's what you ought to do...look for something good in you, something that will make you proud of yourself.
I Wish I Could Be Like You One Day.
IbnAbdulHakim Thank`s.:)M1 I Did Not Mean Hell As In The HellFire, You Are Right Though.I Just Had One Of Those Bad Days
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The Ruler
03-28-2007, 09:24 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
I Wish I Could Be Like You One Day.
be proud of yourself anon...you have just said words that has softened my heart into one soft marshmallow :cry:...and no one has ever been able to do that (other than my coursework that ran away from me today) :)

lol...seriously :happy:
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AnonymousPoster
03-28-2007, 09:30 PM
So Glad Sister lol. I Just Inner Peace I Want To Be Happy Be A Good Muslims I Want To Stop Sinning. In My Prayers I Ask Allah SwT To Guide Me 1 Hour Later I Am Sinning! Ya Allah SwT. It Feels PointLess Because I Am Going To Do It Again Again And Again
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The Ruler
03-28-2007, 09:35 PM
:sl:

Say: "O `Ibadi (My servants) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not. [39:53].

:)

:w:
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AnonymousPoster
03-28-2007, 09:38 PM
The Mercy Of Allah Swt!!!!!!!!!:cry: Sis Thank You May AllahSwT BlEss You
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The Ruler
03-28-2007, 09:41 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
The Mercy Of Allah Swt!!!!!!!!!:cry: Sis Thank You May AllahSwT BlEss You
Ameen...and you too :)...its not the first time this ayah has worked out for someone lol..its my favourite :happy:

:w:
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omar_2133
03-29-2007, 01:05 PM
Don't worry, you're not alone - literally millions of people around the world have the exact same problem as you, so really it's nothing different or anything.

You just need to fix in your mind that as a person, YOU yourself are not ugly (unless you are a genuinely evil person, which I know you're probably not;). It's only your external "shell". When someone comments or has a bad thought about you, tell your mind that the person is NOT commenting about you at all, just your "external" covering.

Every one is different in their own special and unique way. I mean hey, look at me, I'm not exactly the most good looking guy around:rollseyes .

I suppose at one stage or another, you've just got to accept who you are, and get along with the life. You can't moan about this for ever in your life because that won't solve anything. It is the inside that counts and you should let people see more of your inside which will hopefully dispell any "bad" feelings or thoughts they have about you.
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edil
03-31-2007, 04:04 AM
Asalamu Aleykum sis you know everyone is beautiful in their own way and if you have low self esteem then that wont help you because it can hurt you in a really bad way a guy is suppose to marry you for your personality and not for your looks so if the right guy comes along then know that he should marry you for who you are and not how you look sis. Insha'allah I will keep you in my prayers and know that your the only one that can keep her confidence up.
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madeenahsh
03-31-2007, 05:06 PM
Allaah says,

"There is not a single thing except that its depositories and treasures are with Us." [Al-Hijr (15): 21]

This verse comprises a [great] treasure from the treasures [of the Qur`aan], this being that nothing is sought except from the One Who possesses its depositories and treasures, the One in Whose Hands lie the keys to these treasures. Seeking [things] from anyone else is seeking something from one who does not possess them or possess any authority over them.

The saying of Allaah,

"And that to your Lord is the final goal." [An-Najm (53): 42]

Comprises an immense treasure, this being that every desired objective that is not desired for His sake and is not connected [in any form or fashion] to Him then it is temporary and soon to disappear for its final goal is not with Him. The final goal lies only with the One to Whom all matters find their conclusion, terminating at His creation, Will, Wisdom and Knowledge. Therefore He is the source of every desired matter.

Everything that is loved - if it is not loved for His sake then this love is nothing but distress and punishment. Every action that is not performed for His sake then it is wasted and severed. Every heart that does not reach Him is wretched, veiled from achieving its success and happiness.

Therefore Allaah has gathered everything that could be desired from Him in His saying,

"There is not a single thing except that its depositories and treasures are with Us." [Al-Hijr (15): 21]

And He has gathered everything that is done for His sake in His saying,

"And that to your Lord is the final goal." [An-Najm (53): 42]

Therefore there is nothing beyond Allaah that deserves to be sought and nothing finds its conclusion with other than Him.



Ibn Abee Haatim (d.328H) - rahimahullaah - said:

“I entered Damascus and came upon the students of hadeeth, and I passed by the circle of Qaasim al-Joo’ee (d.248H). I found a group sitting around him and he was speaking. Their appearance amazed me; and I heard him saying: “Seize the benefit of five things from the people of your time: when you are present, you are not known; when you are absent, you are not missed; when you are seen, your advice is not sought; when you say something, your saying is not accepted; and when you have some knowledge, you are not given anything for it. I also advise you with five matters: when you are treated unjustly, do not behave unjustly; when you are praised, do not become happy; when you are criticised, do not become upset; when you are not believed, do not become angry; and if people act deceitfully towards you, do not act deceitfully towards them.” Ibn Abee Haatim said: So I took that as my benefit from Damascus.” [3]
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Annie
04-01-2007, 08:32 PM
Salams sister
im not being rude but you are being selfish i believe allah has given every indivual beauty weather its external or internal,you need to think about the realityof life and look around there are many people who have disabilities and still they live a happy life,you should thank allah for how he created you.if you dont mind me askingdid you ever get bullied because alot of people who have low selfesteem is because they have been bullied.
wasalam annie
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zircon
04-02-2007, 12:21 AM
salam,
sis.. you are not alone. i used to feel the same. i looked through the newspaper and saw a pic of beautiful models and when i turned the other page, i saw a not-so-good-looking girl; but reports were written on her success in academics field. see.. there will always be some ppl to appreciate and value us for our achievement, not only of mere looks. btw the thought i got when looking at that pic? "if the girl thought of herself as ugly, and keeping her life busy thinking abt it, she wouldnt have been on the paper today. she wouldnt be able to reach that kind of achievement. why? simply cause she didnt look at her other potential as being too much concerned of her look."

similarly, if we keep on focusing on our looks, it'll bring us nowhere. ppl's desire will never be satisfied with what they have if you let it wild. i mean, if a person is ugly, she will want to look beautiful. if she is beautiful, she wants to look more beautiful. even then, if she sees someone prettier than her, she will want to be the most beautiful of all. that's the way syaitan slips in and plays the trick on us.

How many ppl are beautiful but that only takes them far from Allah that they'd become the slave of men and the victim of cosmetics etc. plus, no matter how beautiful one is, she cant take 'it' with her when she dies. after all, everyone ends up a corpse. there's nothing to be really proud of.

Think of how Allah has blessed you with your own appearance. i mean, imagine how great we are formed when we were before just a clot of blood and a lifeless flesh! we've to love ourselves; for Allah has raised our level more superior than any living things e.g. animals. If you haven't seen a link posted by another bro in the multimedia section, i think you'll find this amazing enough: http://aimediaserver.com/studiodaily...640&height=520

Last but not least, ppl might not call for our names as being those under the 'beautiful' category, but if we are righteous servants of Allah; He will call us by name and tells His angels of how He loves that particular person. whats more honourable than that...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIEoWSB63hI

Do not be weak, neither sorrow while you are the upper ones, if you are believers.(Qur'an 3:139)

I wish you peace and serenity~
there's plenty of us here and we are your sisters in islam
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Shafina
04-02-2007, 02:19 AM
Assalamualikum,

Hi sis i can understand how you are feeling, as I was in ur plight also. My self esteem were very low. I practically hated my self. After some time i realised. IS it all worth it. Critisizing one self is equivalent to critisize the creater. Sis he created us for a reason. Would you want to critisize Allah SWT for that. I always told myself that Allah has created me this way to test me. I increased by self esteem by praying and etc. How we look like is not in our hands. Don't worry about others. Believe in Allah and surely he will help u oversome this as i did insyallah.
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