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AnonymousPoster
04-30-2007, 01:21 PM
aslamu alkum brothers and sisters

well my best friend just told me that he is a gay muslim :cry: and i dont know what to do i am a muslim guy and i use 2 look up to him.. is it right for me not to talk to him anymore? i told him its wrong for him to be gay but he believes its right.. what shall i do?
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Medina83
04-30-2007, 01:51 PM
It is wrong to be gay..this is the work of Shaitan so you will not be able to convince him otherwise...Allah swt only can change hearts and minds to the Truth.

Have you sinned yourself ever?
Would you like it if someone knew you sinned and refused to spend time or talk with you?

This guy is a full person, more than just 'gay'.
Tell him you don't wish to become involved or discuss that side of his life.
Try and be kind with him still, we should be kind to everyone, even those going through difficulties and tests. Doesn't Allah swt forgive every sin except Shirk?

Be acquaintances with him, maybe not so much deep friends, and don't follow his examples because he is unfortunately misguided.

But don't judge him, smile he has good characteristic also I am sure. Be compassionate.

This just my personal opinion,

Salam
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Malaikah
05-01-2007, 12:33 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
well my best friend just told me that he is a gay muslim :cry: and i dont know what to do i am a muslim guy and i use 2 look up to him.. is it right for me not to talk to him anymore? i told him its wrong for him to be gay but he believes its right.. what shall i do?
:sl:

I'm no expert, but I can tell you that you should abandon him if that will make him worse. You should help... show him the evidence that it is haram... tell him to fear Allah, maybe help him to become more God-fearing if you think he needs to, and then once you think he has developed his imaan enough try to persuad him that it isn't right...

That's all I can really think of.

May Allah guide him and forgive him, and all of us. Ameen.
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skhalid
05-01-2007, 12:44 PM
It is hard but try your best to persuade him other wise...but do avoid following his example...being gay is haram in Islam...some say its un-natural because God create Adam and Eve as male and female relationship should be kept with these genders only...He DIDNT CREAT MEN for MEN OR to be fair WOMEN for WOMEN...therefore discuss it with him and see why he decided to accept the shaitans ways and become gay...because no1 is born gay...they are born with free will...this develops due to peers...environment and other aspects...I shall pray to ALLAH to prevent this occuring to muslims especially as it is forbidden, even though it is permitted in other religions as well!!!!
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AnonymousPoster
05-01-2007, 12:57 PM
aslamu alkum brothers and sisters

well my best friend just told me that he is a gay muslim and i dont know what to do i am a muslim guy and i use 2 look up to him.. is it right for me not to talk to him anymore? i told him its wrong for him to be gay but he believes its right.. what shall i do?
I'd stay far away as possible from him if i where you, don't be hanging gays man, , you might end up becoming one too. Choose your friends carefully.

Also he seems to believe that what he's doing is right, how can you help a brother who thinks like that. What kind of a muslim calls himself gay, its a disgusting sin, a disease , they can use the excuse there born with it, but we all know it aint true, its a disease. People of lut where the first people that started doing this act. Astaghfirullah. Nonne practised it before them.
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IbnAbdulHakim
05-01-2007, 01:01 PM
if you love islam it will be hard to love him.

yes we hate the sin and not the sinner but whilst his sinning its hard to love him.

try to guide him , may Allah guide him.


i Dont know about you but i would leave my own brother if he turned gay after trying to guide him, i wouldnt live in the same house as him so theres no doubt i would leave my friend (AFTER REALLY TRYING TO GUIDE HIM) if that was to happen.
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Abdul Fattah
05-01-2007, 01:46 PM
Selam aleykum
Well this is a really tricky situation, because a lot of actions with good intentions could sort of backfire. For example if you come on very strong saying: you're a sinner and you're evil and such, then the first thought that will naturally come to him is: "this guy is an idiot and doesn't know what I'm going trough, and as a result, you might even push him further away from Islam.

So some things to keep in mind while talking to him:
1. Try being supportive. acknowedge that he's going trough a rough time and try to guide him.
2. Try not to judge him. In Islam nobody has the right to judge his brother. However that doesn't mean we cannot judge an action.
So never say: "you're bad because of your actions"
Instead say: "that action is a bad action"
3. Try to avoid direct confrontation and argument, it won't help either of you. Instead focus on bringing him closer to Islam. If you can bring your friend closer to Islam, and teach him as much as possible of Islam, then inshaAllah he will realise his own mistake without anyone telling it to him. And be patient inshaAllah.
4. However if he is rebellious and you see that all your work is in vain, then at a certain point you might want to take your distance and focus your dawah on other people who are genuinely interested inshAllah.

And Allah subhana wa ta'ala knows best, may he make things easy for you and guide your friend; and may he forgive me if I gave wrong advice.
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Medina83
05-02-2007, 11:18 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by IbnAbdulHakim

i Dont know about you but i would leave my own brother if he turned gay after trying to guide him, i wouldnt live in the same house as him so theres no doubt i would leave my friend (AFTER REALLY TRYING TO GUIDE HIM) if that was to happen.
Salam brother
In the spirit of trying to understand, can i ask is this something that would just be your preference or you think would be the right thing to do?

Im just a bit confused here...

We are all sinners, if the guy has a belief in Allah and wants to practise Islam but is sinning , how is that different to every other practising Muslim on the planet? The original poster hasnt specified whether this guy practises or what the story is with his faith.

I just don't understand if/ how the sins have been weighted by yourself?

I mean if you sin something repetitively and people knew, how would you feel if they all turned away from you?

If every muslim turns away from this guy, who will be left to help him back towards Truth, to keep guiding him? Only Allah swt changes hearts, but we Muslims surely should rally round someone who is misdirected if they have a heart which is inclined toward Allah swt anyway? We are all tested differently surely.
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IbnAbdulHakim
05-02-2007, 12:19 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Medina83
Salam brother
In the spirit of trying to understand, can i ask is this something that would just be your preference or you think would be the right thing to do?
.
it is a bit of both.

i PREFER to do this for sure and i also wont feel clean praying around a man whos kind has been degraded the most in the holy qur'an. im sure your familiar with the people of Lut Alaihissalaam.

well thats my reasoning, i wont feel clean around such perversion until the bros heart is purified and i wont stop trying to help him get it purified.

i hope you wont think me heartless, but i love ma bros, i will try help them.
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Medina83
05-02-2007, 01:08 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by IbnAbdulHakim
it is a bit of both.

i PREFER to do this for sure and i also wont feel clean praying around a man whos kind has been degraded the most in the holy qur'an. im sure your familiar with the people of Lut Alaihissalaam.

well thats my reasoning, i wont feel clean around such perversion until the bros heart is purified and i wont stop trying to help him get it purified.

i hope you wont think me heartless, but i love ma bros, i will try help them.
Jazak Allah for the clarification, I would just wondering thats all :)

Salam
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