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noodles
05-20-2007, 12:01 AM
NEW YORK

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.

He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction. "Al-Gebra is a problem for us," Ashcroft said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."

White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.
:D

PS: Note to the mods, I felt that since some topics were getting pretty heated, I thought I'd make everyone laugh for a change. And since this is where most people come for serious topics, I just couldnt resist. If you feel it is necessary, do put it in the "halal fun" section :)
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noodles
05-23-2007, 03:27 PM
Bump:) since it just got approved thanks to my Mod freind :P
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MTAFFI
05-23-2007, 03:35 PM
LOL :D :)

nice to see some humor for once!

LOL
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Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
05-23-2007, 03:38 PM
:lol: Hold uppp, is this real? :X Sorry I dunno lol.
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August
05-23-2007, 03:58 PM
Sadly, I thought this was a true story at first! A couple of years ago, my grandmother was questioned for several minuets because she forgot to take sewing scissors out of her purse.
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'Abd al-Baari
05-23-2007, 04:01 PM
:sl:

lol :D:D that mad me laugh :D:D:D
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Cognescenti
05-23-2007, 04:56 PM
I think every 8th and 9th grader hates Al-Gebra as do their parents who have to remember the quadratic equation or how to factor polynomials.

Fortunately, they need not be blamed for tangents. That was the responsibility of a Greek anarchist group....the Geometrists.



The idea that Algebra might be mistaken for some group causing terror is funny....the reason why it is funny isn't so funny.

BTW..Ashcroft is no longer in office.


War jokes can be funny. Here is one from the seige of Sarajevo:

A man with a heavy wooden cross and a crown of thorns is carying his burden through the streets of Sarajevo. An onlooker calls out...."Hey, Jesus, where did you find the wood?"
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Joe98
05-23-2007, 10:28 PM
I tried humour on this forum the other day but nobody "got" the joke :blind:
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Panther
05-24-2007, 08:11 AM
Oh wow, lol.
This thread is made of pure win. I'm copy+pasting these in my other forums. XD
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Encolpius
05-24-2007, 12:12 PM
Originally Posted by Panther
Oh wow, lol.
This thread is made of pure win. I'm copy+pasting these in my other forums. XD
Absolutely, it's a diamond of lulz in a sea of meh and epic fail.

Also, why is the word "WahabbĂ­" censored?
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- Qatada -
05-24-2007, 12:26 PM
Originally Posted by Encolpius
Absolutely, it's a diamond of lulz in a sea of meh and epic fail.

Also, why is the word "Wahabbí" censored?

Try doing a search on it with a space, and the word myth added next to it [on google] :)



Regards.
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Ra`eesah
05-24-2007, 09:17 PM
Assalamu'Alaykum

That is soo funny, but whats more funny is the fact that Algerbra was a invented by the muslims.
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Musaafirah
05-24-2007, 09:21 PM
Originally Posted by Ra`eesah
Assalamu'Alaykum

That is soo funny, but whats more funny is the fact that Algerbra was a invented by the muslims.
I think that was the point!
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Cognescenti
05-24-2007, 09:34 PM
Originally Posted by Ra`eesah
Assalamu'Alaykum

That is soo funny, but whats more funny is the fact that Algerbra was a invented by the muslims.
That is the gag. It's from an Arabic word.

Algebra wasn't invented by the Muslims. It was invented by a mathematician, who, by virtue of the fact he was living in a Muslim country, was likely a Muslim.

You never hear anyone saying Calculus was invented by the Christians or the Theory of Relativity by the Jews. :)

I would say, in general, it is much more likely for religion to impede the advancement of the sciences and mathematics rather than assist in its development. Exhibit one, Mr. Copernicus
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Encolpius
05-24-2007, 10:08 PM
Originally Posted by Cognescenti
That is the gag. It's from an Arabic word.

Algebra wasn't invented by the Muslims. It was invented by a mathematician, who, by virtue of the fact he was living in a Muslim country, was likely a Muslim.

You never hear anyone saying Calculus was invented by the Christians or the Theory of Relativity by the Jews. :)

I would say, in general, it is much more likely for religion to impede the advancement of the sciences and mathematics rather than assist in its development. Exhibit one, Mr. Copernicus
Exhibit Two, Galileo.

Exhibit Three, Johannes Kepler.
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Ra`eesah
05-24-2007, 11:45 PM
Musafira Was that the point! lol how ironic

You know Congescenti, you really dont know how to put your thoughts together do you? First you say

Originally Posted by Cognescenti
That is the gag. It's from an Arabic word.

Algebra wasn't invented by the Muslims.
Then you say EXACTLY what I have said.

Originally Posted by Cognescenti
It was invented by a mathematician, who, by virtue of the fact he was living in a Muslim country, was likely a Muslim..
but nontheless thank you for verifying it for all to see. :)
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Cognescenti
05-25-2007, 12:26 AM
Originally Posted by Ra`eesah
Musafira Was that the point! lol how ironic

You know Congescenti, you really dont know how to put your thoughts together do you?
No, I think the problem is more that I am unable to make my point understood by you.

Here is what I said: Algebra wasn't invented by the Muslims. It was invented by a mathematician, who, by virtue of the fact he was living in a Muslim country, was likely a Muslim.

"The Muslims" (as you put it) did not invent Algebra collectively as a society, it was invented by a man, who like many other men of Science and Mathematics probably learned to keep his mouth shut about matters of faith and their potential conflict with Science.

Similarly, "the Christians" did not discover that the Earth orbited the Sun. Einstein did not have any Rabbinical help on his General Theory of Realtivity. The Buddhists did not invent gunpowder...etc etc.

It usually doesn't make any sense to talk of a group of people inventing something unless the something was invented by a group of people. So you might say a group of English scientists developed an early radar but you wouldn't say the English developed a theory of evolution (Darwin)

I can see from his response, Encolpius, understood what I said and he is probably a native French speaker. Perhaps he can explain it to you as I am having trouble putting my thoughts together.
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Ra`eesah
05-25-2007, 03:11 AM
No, I do not think you get the point. Go back to the Joke that noodle posted, and what I said put 2 and 2 together. Even Musafira got my jest. but no, you have to very condescending and jump to conclusions. But since you want to take it there I will say this, It is known that MUSLIMS in "medieval" times were the cause of Mathematics. But you know what, I bet you are just to proud to admit to that.
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Cognescenti
05-25-2007, 05:22 AM
Originally Posted by Ra`eesah
.........It is known that MUSLIMS in "medieval" times were the cause of Mathematics. But you know what, I bet you are just to proud to admit to that.
Dood. I could care less who invented Algebra. I don't measure my self worth because someone with my beliefs or who may have had a name similar to mine or even spoke a similar language did X or Y 1500 yrs ago. That you would view this as some kind of childish contest is telling.

You might want to consider the possibility that there existed some human being who was contemplating the diameter of the Earth or the use of a lever when the residents of Mesopatamia were building huts of mud and thatch. Do you really think that Mathematics suddenly sprang forth from nothingness in the 10th century?

If I didn't know any better, I might assume you have a big chip on your shoulder.
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Ra`eesah
05-25-2007, 05:30 AM
Still don't get it do you? You took this whole thing an blew it out of proportion. I only said that because it was relevant to the Joke Algebra+Muslim= Terrorist, but no I guess you took it as a threat to your personal being. But Anyway I apologies for the mods who will have to delete the past few posts.
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Cognescenti
05-25-2007, 05:39 AM
Originally Posted by Ra`eesah
Still don't get it do you? You took this whole thing an blew it out of proportion. I only said that because it was relevant to the Joke Algebra+Muslim= Terrorist, but no I guess you took it as a threat to your personal being. But Anyway I apologies for the mods who will have to delete the past few posts.
Ah...I see..so your statement:

Assalamu'Alaykum

That is soo funny, but whats more funny is the fact that Algerbra was a invented by the muslims.


was purely a self-deprecatory joke. :thumbs_up <insert winking smiley here>

You are right that we are probably boring everyone else. :-)
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Ra`eesah
05-25-2007, 05:55 AM
deprecatory? You know, I have one last thing to say to you.

"When the foolish one speaks, do not reply to him,
For better than a response (to him) is silence; And if you speak to him you have aided him, And if you left him (with no reply), in extreme sadness he dies!"
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Eric H
05-25-2007, 06:03 AM
Hello noodles;

That made me chuckle :D

President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."
I used to have a great admiration for centipedes until someone pointed out this formula.


George Bush + 98 legs + 1,000 brain cell = centipede.:X
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Muezzin
05-25-2007, 08:44 AM
To the guys who are arguing over a joke - I don't really care who started it, but just stop it because it makes you look very sad.
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Cognescenti
05-25-2007, 01:24 PM
Originally Posted by Muezzin
To the guys who are arguing over a joke - I don't really care who started it, but just stop it because it makes you look very sad.
Sorry boss
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noodles
05-25-2007, 03:48 PM
So anyone up for a "hot" "steamy" sho... err I mean bowl of noodles? :D
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