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View Full Version : Internet marriages and getting to know the other!- Sheikh Ubayd



Umm Yoosuf
05-20-2007, 09:23 AM
Internet marriages and getting to know the other!- Sheikh Ubayd

Sheikh Ubayd al-Jaabiree spoke against those Muslim men and women who use the internet to find a partner. He said there are amongst some men whose hearts there is a disease and who are cursed by Allaah such that they enter amongst forums specific for women with female names and start chatting with sisters and even if it is for da'wah for they deceive the people around them and then ask them for marriage etc.

The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said "Whoever comes to you and you are pleased with their deen and mannerism..." Saheehah (1022)

Here the sheikh said a Muslim man who wants to get married should go to the wali (her guardian) and not through the internet so they can see the mannerism and deen of the one proposing. How can the deen and mannerism be ascertained from the internet? The hadeeth says "comes to you". Sisters and brothers he said be warned since these brothers and also some sisters have no shame in what they do and sometimes they break marriages as they maybe speak to someone who is already married and chat with them until the divorce has occurred. And he said he has received numerous complaints about this.

Abdulilah Lahmami
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jzcasejz
05-20-2007, 11:11 AM
JazakAllaah Khayr for posting. Shaykh Ubayd is :thumbs_up.
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vpb
05-20-2007, 11:21 AM
:sl:

jazakallah khair for sharing
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Snowflake
05-20-2007, 11:26 AM
I agree these things should be avoided where possible. But it's also true that some people don't have any other way to meet a potential spouse.
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------
05-20-2007, 11:31 AM
:salamext:

I think for both the brothers and sisters, that their parents or older relatives should find someone for them :)
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Snowflake
05-20-2007, 11:42 AM
^That's the ideal solution. But it's not that easy for our revert brothers and sisters. A lot end up marrying dodgy people cuz they have no one to make inquiries from. I think mosques should be doing more to help.

It's also hard for those who live in places where there are hardly any muslims. It'd be great if sisters ran marriage sites and vetted everyone. A good idea would be to ask the users to phone in to make sure they are the gender they claim to be and also to ask for copies of their birth certificates and passports.
Only someone genuine would go through the trouble of providing proof. The dodgy peeps would just go somewhere else.
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chacha_jalebi
05-20-2007, 12:43 PM
people who come on the net for relations are sad! its cause in real life they aint got no friends so they come on net to make friends hah:p

ppl should also realise the net is posed to be for info and not makin friends or family, so they shouldnt get mislead by no one, even if he/she seems good, because findin sum1 off the net makes you a saddo

o yeh erm good post:D
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S_87
05-20-2007, 12:56 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by chacha_jalebi
people who come on the net for relations are sad! its cause in real life they aint got no friends so they come on net to make friends hah:p

ppl should also realise the net is posed to be for info and not makin friends or family, so they shouldnt get mislead by no one, even if he/she seems good, because findin sum1 off the net makes you a saddo

o yeh erm good post:D
:sl:

them im a saddo :happy:

isnt fatwa-online by students of sheikh ubayd? :phew they take his advice for alot of stuff right:?

so what about matrimonial sites where people of course meet before anything?
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HBot 5000
05-21-2007, 06:47 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Al-Mu'minah
Internet marriages and getting to know the other!- Sheikh Ubayd

Sheikh Ubayd al-Jaabiree spoke against those Muslim men and women who use the internet to find a partner. He said there are amongst some men whose hearts there is a disease and who are cursed by Allaah such that they enter amongst forums specific for women with female names and start chatting with sisters and even if it is for da'wah for they deceive the people around them and then ask them for marriage etc.

The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said "Whoever comes to you and you are pleased with their deen and mannerism..." Saheehah (1022)

Here the sheikh said a Muslim man who wants to get married should go to the wali (her guardian) and not through the internet so they can see the mannerism and deen of the one proposing. How can the deen and mannerism be ascertained from the internet? The hadeeth says "comes to you". Sisters and brothers he said be warned since these brothers and also some sisters have no shame in what they do and sometimes they break marriages as they maybe speak to someone who is already married and chat with them until the divorce has occurred. And he said he has received numerous complaints about this.

Abdulilah Lahmami
:sl:

Thank the sheikh for his opinion. I disagree. I don't want my parents to choose my a spouse because i'll end up with someone who i dislike. I certainly don't want to marry anyone from the local muslim community because, well their is allot of reasons mainly language.

The internet for me is ideal. :omg: :X

:w:
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