Major Family Issue

[aMeRiCaN_mUsLiM]

SALAM.

ok well i have an older brother that has commited a major crime in islam. basically, he's a 30 year old man who let go of his wife and three kids (2 boys, 5 and 8, and a baby girl who will be 2 in october.) and that's only because he's been having another love relationship with a christian woman behind my sister-in-law's back. this isn`t the first time, he's been doing this for the past 7 or 8 years with different women and my bhabie finally got the nerve to say enough is enough and moved back to england with her three kids, hoping that he'll learn a lesson and finally come through to move there and seek forgiveness. well, might i add that my brother is very hard headed and has a very dominant mentality as in what he says goes and he's always right. he hates admitting that he's wrong and believes that no one should get in his business. my parents, my other older brother, and my sister as well as myself have been trying to do everything that might potentially help him but he's not willing to accept the help for some reason and pushes everyone away. my mother's been having the hardest time. she's a mentally ill person and a type II diabetic. all this stress and drama is doing nothing but aggravating her. she fights with him 24/7 trying to make him a better person and realize that what he's doing is not halal. but unfortunately, just like my bhabie, she's fed up and on the verge of giving up...well actually, she already kinda has. on top of all that, because she's been doing nothing but trying to help and he's sick of rejecting it everyday, he wants to kick her out of the house too! now this house was once a home of a very happy, desi family and now it's a hell hole of people who constantly argue and bicker. since this house is under my brother's name, my mom feels that she has no right to argue and say that she must stay. so she is now fulfilling his wish and deciding to move out. i, personally hate the idea! i`m 16 years old and have only 2 more years left of high school and i really don`t want to start over...AGAIN! (this would be the 4th time we've moved, by the way.) i have a feeling that my mom is feeling for me and my pain, but it still hurts because she's actually going through with it. needless to say that my mom practically paid for this house on her own, even with my dad. they've always gave him the mortgage money but it's just the fact that this house is under his name so he's at an overruling point right now. please, someone tell me...what should we do to make my brother change? i know we can't change someone unless they want to change themselves but what else can we do? is it right that my mom is getting kicked out and she's accepting it? should she really move?

i`m so confused...BEING A TEENAGER IS HARD ENOUGH!!! lol but seriously, anything anyone can come up with?

[Kittygyal]

Salamualikum.
sweet and short: Best thing do dua'ah inshallah.
psst: whats a 'bhabie'? do you mean Barbie:?

I have to go now so speak soon inshallah
Ma'assalama

[aMeRiCaN_mUsLiM]

Salamualikum.
sweet and short: Best thing do dua'ah inshallah.
psst: whats a 'bhabie'? do you mean Barbie:?

I have to go now so speak soon inshallah
Ma'assalama

"bhabie" means sister-in-law in urdu

[Kittygyal]

"bhabie" means sister-in-law in urdu

Saamualikum.
Oh seen. Okay. All i can say in short sweet words and my two cents is do dua'ah
ma'assalama

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[00:00]

its ur bro thats causing all this trouble, hes the one that needs to get kicked out.

does ur bro live with you?

[Rafeeq]

As the home is in the name of your brother, you can not do anything legally.
My suggestion is to move from there. The world does not end at a house, you r younge and can make money to make bread for your mother even if you do job part time.
Pray Allah as much as you can, as prayers are the tool to change storms even.
May Allah Suhanahu Taala help u
Maasalam

[HBot 5000]

:sl:

Acceptance of righteous deeds from one who commits zina

Question:
Will Allah accept the prayer and good deeds of a person who is continually committing sin such as fornification eventhough in his/her heart the person is aware that he/she is sinning and is full of guilt and tries his/her very best not to continue committing such sin. Except for this weakness this person tries to be a good muslim e.g. never misses daily prayers, giving out time and money towards the cause of Allah, never take alcohol or other un-halal foods etc.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Yes, Allaah will accept whatever righteous deeds he does, such as praying, fasting, giving charity etc., and He will also accept his repentance, as He says (interpretation of the meaning): “And He it is Who accepts repentance from His slaves, and forgives sins, and He knows what you do.” [al-Shooraa 42:25]. But there is the condition that his repentance must be sincere. Does this person truly regret what he has done? Is he indeed determined not to repeat the sin? Has he, I wonder, gotten rid of everything that may lead him to sin, such as relationships, addresses, telephone numbers, going to evil places, bad friends, movies, pictures and so on? What we believe is that if this person truly repents, he will give up this sin.

Zina is one of the worst kinds of immoral deeds. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And come not near to the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a faahishah [i.e., anything that transgresses its limits, a great sin], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allaah forgives him).” [al-Isra’ 17:32].

Married people who commit zina (adultery) are to be punished with the worst and most severe form of punishment, which is to be stoned to death, so that every part of their bodies may feel pain just as they felt pleasure in a haraam manner even though they were not without a halaal source of pleasure (i.e., within marriage). Unmarried people who commit zinaa, and had never been married before, are to be given the maximum number of lashes prescribed in sharee’ah, which is one hundred lashes. In addition, they are subjected to the humiliation of having their punishment witnessed by a group of believers, and are to be banished for one full year from their city, the place where they committed the crime.

The punishment for those who are guilty of zinaa in Barzakh (i.e., after death and before the Day of Resurrection) is that they will be in an oven, the top of which is narrow and the bottom of which is wide. A fire will be lit under it, and they will be naked in (that oven). When the fire is lit, they will scream and rise up until they almost come out of the oven, then when the fire subsides, they will go back down into it. This is what will keep happening to them until the Hour begins. So how will their punishment be in the Fire of Hell itself?

We ask Allaah not to despise us and to accept our repentance; we ask Him to help us to do good and to avoid evil, for He is the All-Hearing, Ever-Near.

Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

:w:

[Dawud_uk]

errrh you and your other brothers kick his butt? if he will not fear Allah then let him fear the muslim communities reaction to his evil.

just a suggestion, would be what i would do. good your family is sticking by your sister in law, too often she gets given the cold shoulder treatment even when not the sisters fault.

assalaamu alaykum,
Abu Abdullah