format_quote Originally Posted by SparklLZz
Asalaamualaikum
that's really true, im a big sufferer of this, i listen to lectures and read books and Alhamdulillah have changed in alot of ways but one thing i find so difficult is the hijaab. i wear it sometimes and i always love wearing it but i think satan gets to me big time because i dont wear it 24/7 and im really scared to wear it! It really bugs me when people say "excuses excuses", i know satan makes 1000 excuses for one sin... by thats my main problem, I KNOW all of this, despite, i still cant bring myself to wear it! arghhhh!! thats why i say "ewhen im ready" because the last thing i want to do is be like so many other girls, put it on and then take it off! I see the hijaab is a big responsiblity, you are WEARING the name of islam. I know peolpe would take me more seriously if i wore it but i dunno... i really cant explain myself..
:sl: Dearest Sister:
I'm not going to say to you that it is easy - although I have known many people who wear hijab right away the moment that they become Muslim - no one else can understand the hardships we go through and one thing may be easy for one person yet difficult for another. Alhumdulilah, I have worn it now for 11 years and it is a part of me that I could never set aside.
I know what you mean that you are scared to wear it. When I first became Muslim I was living in Arkansas and that is really Bible Belt country. Most people at that time were not wearing hijab - including the women from Muslim countries - they wore it in their country and when they got to the US they took it off. I'm not making excuses for anyone - as we all should agree that it is obligitory to wear. The facts remain, people did not wear it.
I was a new Muslim so I was scared to wear it - what would people say - what would people do? I started to wear hijab on Eid. I wore it to the mosque for Eid prayers and afterwards we went for breakfast and I did not take it off (my hair would be messed, it's Eid, why not wear it - etc., etc.). Anyway, I did not take it off and I wore it for the second time in public. When the waitress came to our table . . . she seemed scared - not sure of how to react (remember, back then no one else was setting an example so people were not used to seeing women wear hijab). I was polite . . . said my pleases and thank yous and the woman started to smile and warm up to us. It was then that I realized . . . when I am wearing hijab - and I act with proper ettiquette with people - I am not only telling people that I am a decent person, but now I am also giving people a reflection of Islam. I am saying - Muslims are not bad people. Anything I say or do while wearing hijab is not only a reflection of myself but is a reflection of Islam and is a way that I can make dawah - by making people see Islam through my actions (of course, we need to make sure our actions are a reflection of Islam). After we ate at the restaurant we left and as we were leaving there were two women with several children in tow. Because it was Eid, everyone was wearing nice dresses and hijab (not a sight to be seen at that time). It was so touching to see other women in hijab that I actually cried. It was such a beautiful sight that I promised Allah that I would never take mine off - and, alhumdulilah, I never have.
Since then, I live in a different state and people are more open to Muslims - they see us more and they are much more educated that people in the South (sorry for any Southerners out there!) We are treated well here - for the most part - but we are still not treated the same as people of other faiths.
The only way that we will ever be treated "the same" is if we compromise to the point of being completely like them in thought and deed. Being a Muslim means being different - it is inherent in our religion. The thing we need to realize is that it doesn't matter if we let people know we are Muslim or if we try to hide it . . . it doesn't matter if we dress like they do or we dress like Muslims should dress . . . we are not the same to them no matter what. Beyond that, do we really want to go before Allah and say that we were too shamed or afraid to tell the world that we are Muslim? If we truly believe that being a Muslim is the right choice, then shouldn't we be a banner for all people to see - that we live what we believe and we follow what we believe and that Islam is the truth?
For the non-muslims - it doesn't matter how we dress - they are not going to treat us any differently. Because, when you get down to it . . . it doesn't matter . . . we are still different from them and they can't understand us and our way of life. They will never understand it unless they become open to the message of Islam and many of them are just happy being where they are . . . wearing their short skirts . . . bearing their bodies in the name of freedom . . . and doing things that they should be ashamed of if they only truly believed that God was well aware of all that they do.
Before becoming Muslim, I used to believe that I was only worth something if I tried to make myself as beautiful as possible. I wouldn't even go check the mail unless I had my hair and makeup fixed. Becoming Muslim and wearing hijab taught me that there is more to beauty than just what you show off to people.
There is something liberating about going around satisfied about who you are as a person . . . not having to compete with others . . . not having to be something you aren't and not having to hide behind makeup and clothing that reveals while concealing your true worth as a person. We are worth much more than just bodies to be paraded around and admired - we have hearts and we have souls and we have minds that contain so much more than what is seen in a quick stolen glance by hungry wolves out on the prowl.
The important thing for us to realize . . . life is not a popularity contest. If we only worry about what everyone is going to think of us . . . if we only worry about what people are going to say . . . we are truly going to miss the true message of Islam. If we are not willing to make the sacrifices and to try our best to do what is pleasing to Allah, Allah will not allow us to receive the wisdom needed for true success in this life and in the hereafter. If we seek Allah's pleasure in all that we do, despite the obstacles, Allah will open up other avenues for blessings and provide us with other opportunities for personal growth and wisdom.
As is stated in Sahih Al-Bukhari:
Narrated Anas (R): The Prophet (S) said, "Allah says: 'When a slave of Mine draws near to Me a span, I draw near to him a cubit; and if he draws near to Me a cubit, I draw near to him a fathom. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him running.'"
For all things that Islam requires of us, there is beauty and wisdom to be gained . . . if we only were to reflect and live our lives accordingly.
<<<I can only hope that these words are of some benefit to you.>>>
Asalaam 'Alaikum,
Sumayyah (Muslimbychoice)