PDA

View Full Version : salaams i have a question



michaelconvert
06-10-2007, 10:21 PM
So yesterday i was at the mall with a friend. I was wearing my kufi at the time because a brother at the Masjid told me it was sunnah.......and im cool with that. We were about to walk up some stairs when a man working like at a cologne stand thing asked me to come over. He said as salaamu alaykum and i said my salaams back. It really makes me feel good to meet another Muslim because it feels like im meeting a family member i didnt know i had. We talked for a bit and he sprayed some cologne and he asked if i liked it.......... i said yeah its nice ......and he just gave it too me. I know its rude to not except a gift so i took it and he said all he wanted was for me to pray for him.........i guess dua. That made me feel really nice.

Later we were walking through the mall and i saw some sisters in Hijab and i didnt know if i should say anything. Im not sure on the rules. Is it wrong to say salaams to women? I wasnt like attracted to them in any bad way ................ i just thought all Muslims were supposed to say salaams. But because i didnt know the rules i just went a seperate way around.
Reply

Login/Register to hide ads. Scroll down for more posts
FBI
06-10-2007, 10:28 PM
lol I ignore all sisters, is better that way don't speak unless spoken too lol.
Reply

iwuvaziaf
06-10-2007, 10:44 PM
i think there's a thread on this..

you cant say salam to non-mehram anyway unless you are doing dealings.. i.e. at work, at school/college.. plz correct me if i am wrong.. maybe Fi-Sabillilah could step in here and help us out.. inshaAllah

i guess passer-by is a no no! because i had the same issue where brothers would say salam to me down the street (when i first started practising).. i wudnt know wot to do... now they dnt coz i keep ma head down.. sisters shouldnt even know u r there coz they shudnt be looking... and then secondly, u shudnt be looking.. if ur sight accidently goes towards them.. turn away.. i do a whole 180 depending on the situation...

Wsalam
Reply

- Qatada -
06-10-2007, 10:50 PM
Asalaamu 'alykum (peace be upon you) bro michael. :)



Salaams initiated from a man to a man are ok.

Salaams initiated from a woman to a woman are ok.

Salaams initiated from a man to his mahram women are ok.

Salaams initiated from a woman to a man or from a man to a woman are disliked for fear of fitnah. However if a man initiates a salaams to an elderly woman, that is permissible as long as there's no temptation.

If she is an old woman and he will not be tempted by her, then it is permissible for her to greet the man with salaam and for the man to return her salaams.

If there is a group of women then a man may greet them with salaam, or if there is a group of men, they may greet a woman with salaam, so long as there there is no fear that any of the parties may be tempted.
Al-Nawawi said in his book al-Adhkaar (p. 407):

Our companions said: Women greeting women is like men greeting to men. But when it comes to women greeting men, if the woman is the man's wife, or his concubine, or one of his mahrams, then it is like him speaking to another man; it is mustahabb for either of them to initiate the greeting of salaam and the other is obliged to return the greeting. But if the woman is a stranger (non-mahram), if she is beautiful and there is the fear that he may be tempted by her, then the man should not greet her with salaam, and if he does then it is not permissible for her to reply; she should not initiate the greeting of salaam either, and if she does, she does not deserve a response. If he responds then this is makrooh.
Al-Haafiz said in al-Fath:

Concerning the permissibility of men greeting women with salaam and women greeting men: what is meant by its being permitted is when there is no fear of fitnah.
You can read more about it in depth here inshallah.


And Allah Knows best.

http://www.islamicboard.com/714752-post36.html
Reply

Welcome, Guest!
Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up
00:00
06-10-2007, 10:51 PM
......................
Reply

Maidah
06-10-2007, 11:53 PM
ok this is a relevant question to the one above.

Some days ago i had this muslim man get one the bus with me nd my friend, and he said asslamalakum nad we returned it. On the bus he took out a bear nd started drinkin it.

He was kinda misbehaving with the others but kinda being respectfull to us, maybe cuz we was wearing a scarf. Anyways on his way off the bus he said salamalaikum again, but this time only i returned it and my friend didn't.

Now i don't know, do you have to return the greeting of such a person, or anyone in a similar situation to him?

JazakAllah khair
Reply

BanGuLLy
06-10-2007, 11:58 PM
When I went to the mosque yesterday.. I said Salaam and shook almost every single persons hands(not womens)... It was my first time at that mosque..I guess they wanted to make me feel welcome.. But mosque and shopping mall is completely different.. so I dunno..
Reply

islamirama
06-11-2007, 12:12 AM
Originally Posted by Maidah
ok this is a relevant question to the one above.

Some days ago i had this muslim man get one the bus with me nd my friend, and he said asslamalakum nad we returned it. On the bus he took out a bear nd started drinkin it.

He was kinda misbehaving with the others but kinda being respectfull to us, maybe cuz we was wearing a scarf. Anyways on his way off the bus he said salamalaikum again, but this time only i returned it and my friend didn't.

Now i don't know, do you have to return the greeting of such a person, or anyone in a similar situation to him?

JazakAllah khair
I can understand you and your friend returning the salaam being there were two of you but after seeing him do haraam and display such behavior, you friend was correct to do what she did. It would've given him something to think about.


What bro Fi_Sabilillah wrote is good to go by. Also, just in general. It's best not to give salam to opposite gender unless you have to. Giving salam in the masjid is quite different than the mall or university or supermarket. Some sisters may not feel comfortable being appoarch outside by non-mahrams. And then there's some who might get the wrong idea that you are interested in them or something by your friendly body language and misunderstand it to mean something other than your intentions. So just rule of thumb, i avoid doing that unless i'm in a situation where you should otherwise just go on about your business. Now if someone is in distress then of course you should give your salam and offer assistance, it all depends on the situation as well.
Reply

SATalha
06-11-2007, 12:19 AM
I would of knocked the guy out......lol iam only joking (its my east-end side kicking in) Anyway like the brother said this guy was in a state of sin and best to avoid these people becuase you dont know what fitnha they bring and whats in their intentions.
Reply

michaelconvert
06-11-2007, 02:17 AM
oooooooook
i think its clear enough now
i do look for threads before i post
though i could have missed one

so thanks for all the insight

salaam
Reply

jannat
06-11-2007, 06:52 AM
:sl:
but what about at work . i usually greet all my customers, muslims and non muslims and occasionally a muslim brother will give salam, would it not be rude to reply back:?

Jazakallah

:w:
Reply

HBot 5000
06-11-2007, 08:27 AM
no harm in being civil is their?
Reply

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 13
    Last Post: 05-03-2009, 03:57 AM
  2. Replies: 12
    Last Post: 11-13-2006, 02:34 PM
  3. Replies: 8
    Last Post: 09-26-2006, 03:01 PM
  4. Replies: 6
    Last Post: 02-21-2006, 06:59 PM
  5. Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-26-2005, 11:30 AM

IslamicBoard

Experience a richer experience on our mobile app!