Honouring One's Parents [Archive]

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Ibn Abi Ahmed

09-12-2007, 04:43 PM

:sl:

Originally translated by a brother on a different forum.

The following were collected by 'Abd al-Malik al-Qasim, in his book 'Birr al-Walidayn':

1 - Mujahid said:

"If the parents grow old and end up urinating and answering the call of nature on themselves, do not feel disgusted or say 'Uff' to them. Rather, remove the urine and feces from them, just as they used to do when you were young without feeling disgust in doing that for you."

2 - al-Husayn bin 'Ali narrated:

"Had there been an act of disrespect (to the parents) less than saying 'Uff', Allah would have disallowed it as well."

3 - al-Bayhaqi reports that Ibn 'Abbas said:

"Allah opens two doors (to Paradise) for every Muslim that is dutiful to his (or her) two Muslim parents, awaiting the reward with Allah alone, and one door if he (or she) had one surviving parents to whom he was dutiful. Furthermore, if one makes his parents angry, then Allah will not be pleased with him until his parents forgive him."

He was asked: "Even if they were unjust to their child?"

He said: "Even if they were unjust."

4 - Ibn al-Jawzi reports that Ibn Muhayriz said:

"He who walks in front of his father will have fallen into disrespect of him, unless he walks in front of him to remove some harm from his way."

He also reports in his book 'al-Birr was-Silah':

"Children, no matter how old they get, should not look their parents straight in the eye, walk in front of them, speak first when they are present, or walk to the right or left of them, unless they make such a request. Rather, children should walk behind their parents just as a servant would do with his master."

He also reports that when Nasr ibn Abu Hafidh al-Maqdisi travelled from Jerusalem to Iraq to learn with al-Kazaruni, a well-known scholar at that time, al-Kazaruni asked him: "Is your mother alive?" Nasr said: "Yes." al-Kazaruni asked: "Have you taken her permission?" Nasr said: "No." al-Kazaruni said, "By Allah! You will not learn from me until you go back to her so that her anger ends." Nasr went back to his mother in Jerusalem and remained with her until she died, then traveled to collect knowledge.

5 - Abu Bakr bin 'Ayyash said:

"I used to sit with Mansur in his house and I would hear his mother, who was loud and rude, shout at him, 'O Mansur! Ibn Hubayrah (governor of Iraq at that time) appointed you to the post of judge, but you refused!' Mansur would not even look her in the eye out of respect."

6 - When Haywah bin Shurih used to sit teaching the people, his mother would sometimes say to him: "O Haywah! Feed the chickens some barley," he would leave the audience, obey his mother, and then resume the lecture!

7 - at-Tirmidhi reports that the Prophet said:

"The parent is the best among the doors of Paradise, so lose that door or protect it."

8 - Ibn 'Abbas said, when he was asked about the people of al-A'raf:

"al-A'raf is a mountain between Paradise and the Fire. Those who will be kept at al-A'raf include some men who joined the Jihad without permission from their fathers and mothers and were martyred in the Jihad. Their death in the cause of Allah qualified them to be saved from the Fire, but their disobedience to their parents prevented them from entering Paradise. They will remain at al-A'raf until Allah decides in their case."

9 - The Prophet said:

"No child can pay back his parents, unless he finds that his father is a slave, so he buys him and sets him free."

10 - Ibn al-Jawzi reported that al-Hasan said:

"It is better for you to eat dinner with your mother, so that her heart is comforted, than to perform a voluntary Hajj."

11 - al-Hakim narrates that the Prophet said:

"Allah delays the punishment for whatever sins He wills until the Day of Resurrection, except for disrespect and disobedience of the parents, for he rushes its recompense (in this life)."

12 - Ibn al-Jawzi reported:

During hot days, az-Zubayr ibn Hisham would taste the water he brought and if he found it to be cold, he would prefer his father with it and send it to him to drink.

He also reports that Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, used to carry his mother so that she could answer the call of nature and bring her back when she was finished after she became old and blind.

13 - Zur'ah bin Ibrahim narrated:

A man came to 'Umar and said to him: "I have an old mother who is unable to go answer the call of nature, so I carry her on my back. I also help her perform ablution while turning my face away from her (out of respect). Have I fulfilled my duty towards her?"

'Umar said, "No."

The man said: "Even though I carry her on my back and exert myself in her service?"

'Umar said: "She used to do the same for you when you were young, while hoping that you will live. As for you, you await when she will go away (die)."

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