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Maidah
10-06-2007, 11:20 PM
I found this article on the net and i thought i share it with everyone, i was laughing when i read it and i'm speechless. :uuh:



Man divorces wife by text message


Tags: Wireless, Text Message, Islam, Marriage
Wendy McAuliffe ZDNet.co.uk

Published: 28 Jun 2001 16:28 BST

A man in Dubai who divorced his wife by a short text message has set a legal precedent for other Islamic divorce cases.

Under Islamic law, a man can divorce his wife by simply saying "I divorce thee" three times. The Dubai courts have now accepted that this can be done electronically, after a man divorced his wife by a single text message reading, "Why are you late? You are divorced."

The case was referred to Islamic scholars by the family reconciliation of the Dubai courts, in order to assess its validity. "All have said that the divorce is valid as the husband expressed the will to divorce and the wife received it," said religious scholar Abdel-Salam Darwish to the Gulf News.

Darwish decided that four conditions must be met for an electronically communicated divorce to be valid. The husband should be the sender of the message, and he must also wish to divorce. The phrasing must also be unambiguous, and finally the wife must receive the communication. As all four requirements were fulfilled in the above case, the divorce was granted.

In the past two months, 15 other Islamic divorce cases had involved mobile phone messages. Darwish has warned that divorce should not be taken more lightly in the era of electronic communications. "Supposing a husband jokingly sends his wife a message telling her he was divorcing her. Under Sharia law, the divorce would be valid."

The couple in question are in their mid-twenties, and had been married for two years. They are now living together again with their baby daughter, which is allowed under Islamic law.
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Isambard
10-06-2007, 11:36 PM
lol thats one way to do it I suppose...
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S_87
10-06-2007, 11:39 PM
:sl:

SubhanAllah
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Md Mashud
10-06-2007, 11:49 PM
I don't see how that is Islamic - rather a technical loopwhole of the law system. Their is, Islamically, suppose to be meetings/talks to try work out differences, between those "divorce" statements.
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amirah_87
10-06-2007, 11:49 PM
"Why are you late? You are divorced."
SubhaanAllaah. Divorce has become so normal nowadays. :cry:

May Allaah prevent us from acting hastily.
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 01:34 AM
:sl:

^It is his lost- he has already used up one statement it seems. If he does it a second time his wife has the option to leave or stay, not him. And if he didn't really want to divorce her, but she wants it, then he has lost out big time.

Originally Posted by Md Mashud
I don't see how that is Islamic - rather a technical loopwhole of the law system. Their is, Islamically, suppose to be meetings/talks to try work out differences, between those "divorce" statements.
Not really... he said the words, therefore the first divorce is used up. Presumable there was meetings/talks because they decided to stay together rather than divorce.
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 02:21 AM
Originally Posted by Maidah

Under Islamic law, a man can divorce his wife by simply saying "I divorce thee" three times.
In absence of any helper, I say: in my humble opinion, what a lot of rubbish!

does any of you know, why we have to do it 3 times with a gap in-between each utterance?
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sevgi
10-07-2007, 03:10 AM
"They are now living together again with their baby daughter, which is allowed under Islamic law."

im gna +o(

i think it just may be valid if he had sent three seperate messages...coz, each 'utterance' must be distinct and the divorcer needs to think abt it between each one...most of the time we say things out of anger...saying something three times with a break in between, or texting it for that matter, allows the divorcer to really consider the consequences and see if they truly mean it...
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snakelegs
10-07-2007, 03:24 AM
how long a gap does there need to be between each pronouncement?
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 03:25 AM
"They are now living together again with their baby daughter, which is allowed under Islamic law."

im gna

i think it just may be valid if he had sent three seperate messages...coz, each 'utterance' must be distinct and the divorcer needs to think abt it between each one...most of the time we say things out of anger...saying something three times with a break in between, or texting it for that matter, allows the divorcer to really consider the consequences and see if they truly mean it...
^^ some commonsense at last!
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sevgi
10-07-2007, 03:43 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
^^ some commonsense at last!
estagfirullah...
i probably would have never thought of it if u hadnt mentioned it below.

but yes, it is commonsense.

what this article suggests is that muslims can run around marrying four wives, and divorcing em over the phone as they wish, when they find a better fourth wife...

its degrading really.

i think that the 'imaams' or whatever, who stated that the divorce is valid, either did not take these crucial things into account, or, they just need a little therapy...or, maybe this arrangement suited their own requirememnts...

ive got nothing to say.we need 'normal' people at the head of our muslim communities, minor, major, it doesnt matter. they all impact the view on islam. we need to find a way to universalise in this contemporary context...but the further we move..the more impossible this becomes.we can even see this in our forum.i say not all music is haraam, some say even duff is haraam.what can we do?

and no...im not suggesting to wage war, or establish the new calipate. im am merely trying to portray the complexity we are drawing our religion 'our way of life' into.

certainly not helping to add text messaging to our divorce system...

peace.
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sevgi
10-07-2007, 03:46 AM
Originally Posted by snakelegs
how long a gap does there need to be between each pronouncement?
i have no idea..but as ur post prior to editing suggested three months or so...i would, according to the very little that i know, need to say no...not that long...

i always concieved it as being just a few moments..a few deep breaths perhaps...?

it is way early for me to be thinking abt divorce or marriage at that...so i havent gone into it.sorri snakes.but bro noname55 can probably help.he seems to know what hes talkn bout.
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 03:58 AM
^^ you are both kind of right
After divorce the woman should wait three monthly cycles during which her husband remains responsible for her welfare and maintenance. He is not permitted to drive her out of the house during this period. She has been advised not to leave the house of the divorcing husband, in order to enhance the chances of reconciliation, as well as to protect her right of sustenance during the three months waiting period. The main purpose of this waiting period is to clarify whether the divorced wife is or is not expecting a child. Its second use is as a cooling-off period during which the relatives and other members of the family or of the community may try to help towards a reconciliation and better understanding between the partners. The Qur'an says:

"And if you fear a breach between the two, then appoint a judge from his people and a judge from her people; if they both desire agreement, Allah will effect harmony between them, surely Allah is Knowing, Aware." (4:35).

If they are reconciled they may resume the marriage relations at any time within the waiting period, whereupon the divorce is automatically revoked. If further trouble arises and divorce is pronounced a second time, the same procedure is followed. Only if the matter reaches a third divorce does it become irrevocable. The wife is then to leave the house and is free after three monthly cycles to marry another man if she wishes. The first husband is not then permitted to remarry her unless she has in the meantime married another man and been divorced in usual legal manner.
^^ This procedure is the normal one followed if the husband is the one seeking divorce or if the divorce is by mutual consent
If the wife seeks divorce against the wishes of the husband she may take her case to the court and obtain divorce.

An instance was reported at the time of the Prophet when a woman came to him saying that although her husband was a good man and she had no complaint against his treatment, she disliked him greatly and could not live with him. The Prophet directed that she should return to the husband a garden which he had given to her as her mahr, as the condition of her divorce. This procedure is sanctioned in the Qur'an where Allah says:
"And if you fear that they may not be able to keep the limits of Allah, then there is no sin for either of them, if the woman redeems herself with that" (2:229).
One may observe that modern developments in marriage law in England and other Western countries are tending towards the Islamic pattern, albeit unconsciously, in many ways, stressing guidance and counselling before divorce, privacy of divorce proceedings and speeding of the process of divorce once it has been established that the marriage has irretrievably broken down.

The law of Islam does not therefore compel unhappy couples to stay together, but its procedures help them to find a basis on which they can be reconciled with each other. If reconciliation is impossible the law does not impose any unnecessary delay or obstacle in the way of either partner's remarriage.
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Danah
10-07-2007, 04:07 AM
How strange!
the divorce must not be taken so lightly.
I heard a stroy said that there is a wife recieved a message from unknowen number telling her that she is divorced. the wife was shoked from the message.
but at the end she realized that it was from a husband to his wife telling her that she is divorced. and our poor wife was sent the message by mistake.


thats why I think it is not an easy thing to do.
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sevgi
10-07-2007, 04:15 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
^^ you are both kind of right
what if the woman announces a divorce...does she still have to stay in the house for three months?
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 04:19 AM
Originally Posted by sumeyye
what if the woman announces a divorce...does she still have to stay in the house for three months?
she has to go to court to get divorced, and may live in a safe house (if under threat)

http://www.islamicboard.com/general/...tml#post839139 is more complete now.
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 04:26 AM
Originally Posted by sumeyye
what this article suggests is that muslims can run around marrying four wives, and divorcing em over the phone as they wish, when they find a better fourth wife...
:sl:

No it doesn't. Just because the divorce is valid doesn't mean the way he did it is permissible!

i think that the 'imaams' or whatever, who stated that the divorce is valid, either did not take these crucial things into account, or, they just need a little therapy...or, maybe this arrangement suited their own requirememnts...
Please, sister, I do not know if you realise this but you have just written is slander. We have no right to judge these religious figures, who we have never meet, in such a way.

Any utterance of divorce, as long as the person was not forced in to saying it or insane, is valid , even if the person was joking. The scholars have made ijtihad that it includes text messages. If you do not agree (because you know of a sheikh who says other wise, not just because you think it is stupid) then that is fine but there is no need to mock others who have the right to hold this opinion.

ive got nothing to say.we need 'normal' people at the head of our muslim communities, minor, major, it doesnt matter. they all impact the view on islam. we need to find a way to universalise in this contemporary context...but the further we move..the more impossible this becomes.we can even see this in our forum.i say not all music is haraam, some say even duff is haraam.what can we do?
They ARE normal.

certainly not helping to add text messaging to our divorce system...
They are not adding it- a person divorced by text message, it is up to the scholars to figure out whether this is valid and the divorce still counts, or whether it is invalid. Again, validity does not mean that it is permissible/recommended or whatever.
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sevgi
10-07-2007, 04:28 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah
:sl:

No it doesn't. Just because the divorce is valid doesn't mean the way he did it is permissible!



Please, sister, I do not know if you realise this but you have just written is slander. We have no right to judge these religious figures, who we have never meet, in such a way.

Any utterance of divorce, as long as the person was not forced in to saying it or insane, is valid , even if the person was joking. The scholars have made ijtihad that it includes text messages. If you do not agree (because you know of a sheikh who says other wise, not just because you think it is stupid) then that is fine but there is no need to mock others who have the right to hold this opinion.



They ARE normal.



They are not adding it- a person divorced by text message, it is up to the scholars to figure out whether this is valid and the divorce still counts, or whether it is invalid. Again, validity does not mean that it is permissible/recommended or whatever.
all i will say is

ok and thank u for ur thoughts.
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 04:35 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
In absence of any helper, I say: in my humble opinion, what a lot of rubbish!

does any of you know, why we have to do it 3 times with a gap in-between each utterance?
Are you saying the opinion of the vast majority of scholars of Islam is rubbish?

Because the vast majority of scholars have said that even if a man declares divorce three times in the same sitting, the divorce is valid and he can never return to his wife again unless she married and gets divorced again legitimately. However, he is sinful for doing so. But the divorce is valid.

Originally Posted by snakelegs
how long a gap does there need to be between each pronouncement?
If he wants a divorce, he says it once. During the waiting period (three months time), he has the right to change his mind and take his wife back. After the waiting period, they are official divorced but have the right to remarry each other.

After that, when he says it the second time, there is another three month waiting period, and he has no right to take his wife back, rather it is the wife's choice.

If she decides not to divorce, and the husband agrees, and he then divorces her a third time, they can not remarry until the wife has married someone else and become divorced from him legally.

However there does not have to be a gap at all for the divorce to be valid. If the man says 'I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you' just like that, they are divorced and can not remarry until the wife is divorced by someone else. However the man is sinful for doing so.
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 04:43 AM
^^ I have learned from bitter experience that I should not hit (virtual or physical) brickwalls with my feeble ole head. hence forth I :zip: and run when see one
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 04:46 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
^^ I have learned from bitter experience that I should not hit (virtual or physical) brickwalls with my feeble ole head. hence forth I :zip: and run when see one
Maybe it would be more productive if you explained what you disagreed with?
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 05:10 AM
^^ Not a chance without my helper/advisor, each time I open my mouth about these "ulemaa" in his absence, someone slaps me with 45 infraction points
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 05:21 AM
:sl:

Maybe if you phrase your objection politely and respectfully no one will have a problem with it? Worth a try.

Which ulama are you referring to anyway? Because I mentioned the vast majority of the 'ulama of Islam follow that opinion, the four imams included (at least some of them, I am not certain if it was all of them).
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Tania
10-07-2007, 05:26 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
^^ Not a chance without Br.Woodrow help, each time I open my mouth about these "ulemaa" in his absense, someone slaps me with 45 infraction points
I really believe the ulema this time has right. If the man its so coward chicken that he can't say in front of her "i wish to divorce from you" he is not able to be neither a father or a husband for her. No respect for her feelings can't lead in future toward a normal marriage.
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 05:39 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
I really believe the ulema this time has right. If the man its so coward chicken that he can't say in front of her "i wish to divorce from you" he is not able to be neither a father or a husband for her. No respect for her feelings can't lead in future toward a normal marriage.
hello there

my dispute is not about this one fellow (if indeed such a person does exist) but the general (bad) impression given about divorce in Islam.

I subscribe to the following method >> http://www.islamicboard.com/general/...tml#post839139

wa salaam (and peace)
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snakelegs
10-07-2007, 05:45 AM
thanks for your explanation, noname. (#14)
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Tania
10-07-2007, 05:50 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
hello there

my dispute is not about this one fellow (if indeed such a person does exist) but the general (bad) impression given about divorce in Islam.
Hello
I don't think its making a bad impression about divorce in Islam. After me its more dangerous that short term marriage which was made legal. For men without character this its an ideal solution and i am for it. The woman will cry a bit but its for her good.
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 05:53 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
Hello
I don't think its making a bad impression about divorce in Islam. After me its more dangerous that short term marriage which was made legal. For men without character this its an ideal solution and i am for it. The woman will cry a bit but its for her good.
short term marriage which was made legal
there is no such thing allowed in authentic Islam (temp marriage is form of prostitution, to my knowledge only legal in one country called Iran)

bye
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Tania
10-07-2007, 05:59 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
there is no such thing allowed in authentic Islam (temp marriage is form of prostitution, to my knowledge only legal in one country called Iran)

bye
Its not in Iran, its in Saudi.
bye
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snakelegs
10-07-2007, 06:01 AM
it's shia
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 06:05 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
Its not in Iran, its in Saudi.
bye
thank you, if true, its news to me, (exept those royals who do all kinds of illegal stuff)
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 06:33 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
Its not in Iran, its in Saudi.
bye
No, it most certainly is not legal in Saudi!:offended: I think you must be confusing it with something else. Where did you get this information from?:sunny:
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Tania
10-07-2007, 06:55 AM
Its a very good thread and shows clearly how are the men from today :) :
Originally Posted by HeiGou
Can someone help explain this to me? I have tried to look it up on Wikipedia but I am still confused. I thought temporary marriages were banned in Islam? How can a proper Islamic marriage be temporary and without obligations? Is this permitted in Islam and if so, why?

Busy days for Saudi matchmakers
Published: Monday, 15 May, 2006, 11:35 AM Doha Time

RIYADH: Professional matchmakers in Saudi Arabia have boosted their business by 60% following the legalisation of ‘misyar’, a temporary marriage without obligations.


The Saudi newspaper Arab News said one reason why people resort to such secret but legal options is to avoid family responsibilities and others such as housing a woman and rearing her children.

The paper said ‘misyar’ has grown in popularity in the business community, among educated people and among women with private income as well as with the poor.

The increasing number of unmarried women is why such marriages have become more acceptable, said the paper. – DPA
Source:http://www.islamicboard.com/miscella...tml#post310834
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 07:04 AM
touché!
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snakelegs
10-07-2007, 07:35 AM
if i'm not mistaken, these are marriages in which the man takes on no responsibility.
sometimes it is done when a couple is really too young to set up a household. they can continue to live separately with their parents, but can have relations like a married couple.
please correct if i'm wrong.
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 07:44 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
Its a very good thread and shows clearly how are the men from today :) :
Tania, the article is incorrect. Misyar is not temporary at all.

From that same thread:
Misyar marriage can be defined as a marriage contract between a man and a woman, in which the woman waives some of the rights she would have in a normal Islamic marriage. This sometimes takes place when, for example, there are many women who, as they get older, find it increasingly difficult to marry. In this case a woman opts for a husband who is not able to fulfil the normal marital duties like financial maintenance, or spending adequate time with her, for example. She considers that marrying such a husband is better than remaining unmarried.

The marriage is not temporary. :)
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 07:48 AM
edit
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snakelegs
10-07-2007, 07:54 AM
What Is Misyar Marriage?

Misyar marriage seemingly is a new phenomenon in Saudi where, as in most of our Muslim Ummah everywhere, there is an alarming rise in the number of unmarried women. In her article, Mariam Al Hakeem wrote

Misyar is described as a form of marriage in which the wife gives up her rights offered under the religion, including the right to have the husband living with her in the same house and providing her with necessary expenses. In short the woman gives up the right to have an independent home. The husband may come to see her at her parent’s home at whatever time he chooses for himself, or at a time agreed by the two.

for the rest see:

http://www.islamonline.net/English/f...rticle04.shtml

also: http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/S...=1119503544160
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Tania
10-07-2007, 08:21 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah
Tania, the article is incorrect. Misyar is not temporary at all.
The people are making to be temporary. Please read the whole thread, including the articles which were posted by Salehah and you will understand why i said temporary like in the link which i gave. B?ut i wanted this morning only to aprove the divorce made at phone :-[
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 08:30 AM
Tania,

His post was about not mutah, misyar. Mutah is temporary and forbidden. :)
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NoName55
10-07-2007, 08:39 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
The people are making to be temporary. Please read the whole thread, including the articles which were posted by Salehah and you will understand why i said temporary like in the link which i gave. B?ut i wanted this morning only to aprove the divorce made at phone :-[
hello again

this marriage is not temp but a crafty way to avoid paying mahr to women. in saudia there are so many scholars for dollars that you can get them to make halal anything a man's heart desires.

its better if you and I both bow out of this thread rather sharpish as there are some folk here who just love to argue the toss and one can never hope to get anywhere with them as they will copy paste entire islamqa site here if provoked. Run sister in Adam, run while you can!
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Tania
10-07-2007, 08:48 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah
Tania,

His post was about not mutah, misyar. Mutah is temporary and forbidden. :)
The line its so thin between them that i think both should be forbidden. all 4 wive must have same rights. Thats its written in the Quran. No :? well, in this case he must provide the same for all or not. I will not accept the men to cut the law after their head and treat with difference the 4 wive. Misyar its used for other purposes too :-[. I will never agreed with it and if it would be after me it would be banned for good. But i would leave the cell phone divorce because its a good option for men :-[
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 09:23 AM
Originally Posted by NoName55
this marriage is not temp but a crafty way to avoid paying mahr to women. in saudia there are so many scholars for dollars that you can get them to make halal anything a man's heart desires. !
Well it is the WOMAN who chooses to enter this marriage, no one can force her into it, so I don't see how your point is relevant! And anyway, the misyar marriage does not mean the woman does not receive a dowry. She still does.

I don't understand why you think you can slander our scholars and then complain that your posts get deleted! :-\

since you are so cynical of islamqa, here is another source for you:

Question:

As-Salamu `Alaykum! May Allah bless you, and in Sha’ Allah you will always be in progress. I want to ask you about the marriage that is called in Arabic Misyar. I hope you will explain to me what it means, and kindly shed light on the Islamic ruling concerning it.

Answer:

Wa`alaykum As-Salamu Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Almighty Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear questioner, we are really pleased to have your question and to have the chance to convey some of the teachings of our religion to our Muslim brothers. In fact, it adds to our happiness to find guidance being disseminated and the word of truth being highly elevated. We hope these humble efforts meet the great expectations of yours.

Misyar marriage can be defined as a marriage contract between a man and a woman, in which the woman waives some of the rights she would have in a normal Islamic marriage. This sometimes takes place when, for example, there are many women who, as they get older, find it increasingly difficult to marry. In this case a woman opts for a husband who is not able to fulfil the normal marital duties like financial maintenance, or spending adequate time with her, for example. She considers that marrying such a husband is better than remaining unmarried.

It’s noteworthy that once a marriage contract meets its Shari`ah requirements, it will be acceptable from the Islamic points of view irrespective of what people call such contract. Conditions of valid marriage are: The consent of both spouses, the consent of the Wali (guardian), the payment of the dower, the presence of the witnesses, and the announcement of the contract.

It goes without saying that valid marriage should not be limited to a certain period of time; otherwise it will be reckoned as a Mut`ah (temporal) marriage which is prohibited in Islam.

Dealing with this subject, the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, states:

Misyar marriage should be viewed as a form of legal relationship between man and woman regardless of any description attached to it. This is pursuant to the juristic rule: "What matters most in contracts are motives and meaning, not the wording or structure."

Therefore, in determining the legal nature of this marriage, we should not judge things according to names, for as we know, people feel free in naming or describing something.

There is nothing new about this kind of marriage. It is in one way or another very similar to what is known as `Urfi marriage or non-documented marriage.

Stipulating certain details in the marriage contract on both sides is acceptable. For example, some `Ulama (scholars) maintain that a woman has a right to determine the timing of marriage; i.e., it can take place at day or night, however, she can also waive this right.

Therefore, based on what has been mentioned, we can state that Misyar marriage, or something in similar form, has been in practice from time immemorial. It also serves the purpose of some women, who, for instance, may be rich but happen to be unable to marry at the proper time. So, such women can opt for this kind of marriage.

But I do have to make it clear that the aforementioned statement does not make me a protagonist of Misyar marriage. In all my Fatwas and sermons, it is not mentioned anywhere that I give any support for such marriage.

The point is that when I was asked by a journalist to state my opinion regarding this marriage, I found it a pressing religious duty to give a clear-cut opinion on something that does not make unlawful what Almighty Allah has made lawful for His servants.

Therefore, if anyone seeks my opinion on this marriage, I must reply him saying: What do you mean by Misyar marriage. However, if I get an explanation that shows that in Misyar marriage, all the Islamic legal requirements are met, then the marriage is valid.

Those requirements are: an offer and acceptance from both parties; a specified dowry, according to the Qur'anic verse: "And give unto the women, (whom ye marry) free gift of their marriage portions" (An-Nisa': 4), and that the contract wins the consent of the guardian. Thereby, no one has the right to brandish it as unlawful.

There is no doubt that such marriage may be somehow socially unacceptable, but there is a big difference between what is Islamically valid and what is socially acceptable. As we know, people can be cynical about the idea of an employee marrying his employer. But who can deny the validity of such a marriage if it meets all the legal requirements?

This issue, therefore, needs a cautious approach. One should not feel free to condemn an act as absolutely forbidden, merely on social repugnance. Rather, one needs to have convincing evidence to determine the legal nature of each particular act.

http://www.islamawareness.net/Marria.../fatwa_01.html
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Tania
10-07-2007, 09:32 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah

I don't understand why you think you can slander our scholars and then complain that your posts get deleted! :-\
Malaikah no one here its slandering the scholars. We just have different attitude toward marriage and this cell phone divorce. :-[
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 09:37 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
The line its so thin between them that i think both should be forbidden. all 4 wive must have same rights. Thats its written in the Quran. No :? well, in this case he must provide the same for all or not. I will not accept the men to cut the law after their head and treat with difference the 4 wive. Misyar its used for other purposes too :-[. I will never agreed with it and if it would be after me it would be banned for good. But i would leave the cell phone divorce because its a good option for men :-[
The line is no thin, it is massive. Mutah is when the couple agree that they will divorce after a set time period. There is no such agreement in misyar marriage.

If the wife does not want to have all these rights- why can't she have the right to refuse them??

As for the cell phone divorce, I don't even know if that is permissible. It might be valid, but it does not mean the person isn't sinful for doing so.
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Tania
10-07-2007, 09:44 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah
The line is no thin, it is massive. Mutah is when the couple agree that they will divorce after a set time period. There is no such agreement in misyar marriage.

If the wife does not want to have all these rights- why can't she have the right to refuse them??
I might not want my husband to bother me each day but i will not write this in the marriage contract. I will tell to my husband i don't want this or that during our marriage because he will understand me (the marriage its based in the first place on understanding). Writing down in the marriage contract, shows clearly the husband its agreeing from the first time he will not treat with the same measure his 4 wive. Thats forbidden and should never ever been allowed.
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 09:45 AM
Originally Posted by Tania
Malaikah no one here its slandering the scholars. We just have different attitude toward marriage and this cell phone divorce. :-[
I don't know what you consider to be slander- but saying that scholars have only allowed misyar marriage to "make halal anything a man's heart desires." is slander in my books.

You didn't say anything wrong, I was not addressing you. :)
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Tania
10-07-2007, 09:56 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah
I don't know what you consider to be slander- but saying that scholars have only allowed misyar marriage to "make halal anything a man's heart desires." is slander in my books.

You didn't say anything wrong, I was not addressing you. :)
Its not slander, its only a conclusion reading what it means this marriage. Are you really finding this marriage to be according with Quran :? You really don't see the women is making certain favours to men :?and this like really gentleman's are taking their big share of benefits :?
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 10:01 AM
If it is a part of Islam- and I have not heard of anything to prove that it is not- then I have no problem with people practising it if that is what they want.

I personally would not want to do it.

By the way, slander in Islam is defined as saying something behind someone's back, which he/she does not want you to say, and which is not true.

I feel that to say that scholars only allowed this marriage to please the desires of men is slander, and especially to call them scholars for dollars!
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Tania
10-07-2007, 10:29 AM
Originally Posted by Malaikah
If it is a part of Islam- and I have not heard of anything to prove that it is not- then I have no problem with people practising it if that is what they want.
....to call them scholars for dollars!
The true its in the children opinion:
"Abu Fahda’s grandchildren share his sentiments — especially sadness. “I don’t know who this man is — this man who comes to our house and spends time with my mother,” said the 6-year-old boy. “He’s not my father, and he can’t be her husband because fathers and husbands live with their families.”"
and
a university professor. “With misyar marriage, haven’t we just legalized the ‘why-buy-the-milk-when-the-cow-is-free’ syndrome? And we’re supposed to be civilized?”
Source: http://www.arabnews.com/?page=9&section=0&article=64891

Scholars for dollars it means people which are asking for money to issue fatwas which are favorable for men.
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Malaikah
10-07-2007, 11:53 AM
I know what scholars for dollars means. To call someone that with out proof is a serious crime in my opinion.

As for this type of marriage. If you don't like it, don't do it.:) It doesn't work for everyone. Just because I would never do it, doesn't mean I will deny others the right to do it if that is what they want. But I agree they should make sure the children don't suffer.
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Haidar_Abbas
10-10-2007, 06:09 PM
:sl: one word...bidah..:sl:
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ISLAMASWEENEY
10-10-2007, 06:11 PM
That is the lowest of the lowest they should do it face to face not by text.
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Kittygyal
10-10-2007, 07:02 PM
:sl: one word...bidah..:sl:
^ Excellent response!
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