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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 02:47 PM
BROTHERZ AND SISTERZ.....

i need ur help with this.....

a distant friend of mine is getting 2 know this brother and they are in the stage of telling there parents about one another.....

but this man is a lier......he fills her with all this rubbish he tells her he is serious about her.....HE TALKS BAD BEHIND HER BACK AND TALKS TO OTHER GIRLS...... but still she believes him...

he moved from america 5 yearz ago and he use to oftenly go 2 prison 4 minner things like getting in 2 fights.....

he is half somali and half spanish.....

1 time when they were meant 2 go to an islamic conference 2getha he came up with this story that his grandmother died and a week later same thing again but this time is mother.....and i know his mother or grandmother didnt die because i have seen them before.........
i tell her he is lieing but she says im jelous which is funi.....

he has crimanl records before and he lies 2 her how he is studyin at oxford university and i knw da ppl at oxford dont allow ppl with crimal records also if they r going 2 study the human body.....
he says he is studyin human body at oxford uni but that course is not at oxford uni

there is more but it is reli long
what shall i dio 2 help her

giove me some advice to give 2 her PLEASE....
thank u xxx
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~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:02 PM
Is she desperate or something? If she loves him then i guess she is well stupid to still love him. This love is a game which should be put forward to 'Riki Lakes show' as it can be well dangerous. All guys say 'I love you baby' do they really mean it?!

**** baby
Just don't understand where we went wrong
I gave you my heart
I gave you my soul
I gave you...

As a matter of fact I was the one who said I love you first
It was about eight years ago, don't act like you don't know
We were sittin' at home in your mama's livin' room
Cause, we couldn't be alone
See your mama knew It was something else, she knew how I felt
Back then we were in school; and that's your favorite excuse
Growin' up I was a fool; and I can't lie I'm missing you
Listen and don't trip
I think i need a bottle with a genie in it
Here's my wish list

First one, I would create a heart changing love
Second one, I'll take yours and fill it up
Third one, but I don't need a lot of wishes cause I'll be okay if I get one

If I had one wish, we would be best friends
Love would never end, it would just begin
If I had one wish, you would be my boo
Promise to love you, trust me I'll trust you
If I had one wish, we would run away
Making love all day, have us a baby
If I had one wish, I'd make you my whole life
And you'd be my wife, make it right this time

Is this the thing thats happning to your friend? Maybe she needs to realise having such company are out of date, this love is fake and your friends needs to get a grip!
Reply

Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:04 PM
Originally Posted by ~Sam~
Is she desperate or something? If she loves him then i guess she is well stupid to still love him. This love is a game which should be put forward to 'Riki Lakes show' as it can be well dangerous. All guys say 'I love you baby' do they really mean it?!

**** baby
Just don't understand where we went wrong
I gave you my heart
I gave you my soul
I gave you...

As a matter of fact I was the one who said I love you first
It was about eight years ago, don't act like you don't know
We were sittin' at home in your mama's livin' room
Cause, we couldn't be alone
See your mama knew It was something else, she knew how I felt
Back then we were in school; and that's your favorite excuse
Growin' up I was a fool; and I can't lie I'm missing you
Listen and don't trip
I think i need a bottle with a genie in it
Here's my wish list

First one, I would create a heart changing love
Second one, I'll take yours and fill it up
Third one, but I don't need a lot of wishes cause I'll be okay if I get one

If I had one wish, we would be best friends
Love would never end, it would just begin
If I had one wish, you would be my boo
Promise to love you, trust me I'll trust you
If I had one wish, we would run away
Making love all day, have us a baby
If I had one wish, I'd make you my whole life
And you'd be my wife, make it right this time

Is this the thing thats happning to your friend? Maybe she needs to realise having such company are out of date, this love is fake and your friends needs to get a grip!
SHES A DISTANT FRIEND BUT HOWEVER SHE SHOULD GET A GRIP....
he has completely changed her and i dont knw y she is fallin 4 his traps
Reply

Umm Hurairah
10-25-2007, 03:05 PM
Asalaamualaikum,

Subhan Allah that's sad to hear. :cry: :cry: :cry:

I can't help much since I've never been in you situation but maybe when you see his mother or grandmother you should point it out to your friend.

Also if you have any proof of his crimes like newspaper article or something else maybe you could show her so she can judge for herself the kind of person he really is?


May Allah guide us all. Ameen.
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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:10 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Hurairah
Asalaamualaikum,

Subhan Allah that's sad to hear. :cry: :cry: :cry:

I can't help much since I've never been in you situation but maybe when you see his mother or grandmother you should point it out to your friend.

Also if you have any proof of his crimes like newspaper article or something else maybe you could show her so she can judge for herself the kind of person he really is?


May Allah guide us all. Ameen.
tankz any way.....i dont know what to do she has lost the plot she tells me all these stories about him and i cant bare 2 listent 2 iot as itz all lies and when i tell her he is lieng she dont believe it...and 1 time he got my number from her fone and started ringing me saying i dont like ur friend i like u...i told HER BUT DID SHE LISTEN NO....he lied 2 her and manipulated the story sayin how i rang him....!!!!!!!!

HELP HELP HELP
Reply

~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:12 PM
Is he rich by any chance? Maybe your friend is scared in loosing him because i knew quiet a few people leaving there Boyfriend as they think other people will take and play chineese wispers!

Its time for your friend to face straight and let the light shine upon her face and not stay on the dull side, this may also lead to depression afterwards!

maybe a catchy question for your friend would be 'DO YOU REALLY LOVE HIM, HOW MANY TIME HAS HE SAID 'I LOVE YOU',HOW MANY TIMES HAS HE LET YOU DOWN, HOW MANY TIMES HAS HE GIVE HIS HEART TO YOU, WHEN DID HE SAY 'I LOVE YOU' FIRST??
Reply

~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:14 PM
Don't run for her, leave her she's an attention seeker! Let her be sick and then she will run towards you and regret the mistake she has made.
Reply

Umm Hurairah
10-25-2007, 03:14 PM
Originally Posted by Yong_sista
tankz any way.....i dont know what to do she has lost the plot she tells me all these stories about him and i cant bare 2 listent 2 iot as itz all lies and when i tell her he is lieng she dont believe it...and 1 time he got my number from her fone and started ringing me saying i dont like ur friend i like u...i told HER BUT DID SHE LISTEN NO....he lied 2 her and manipulated the story sayin how i rang him....!!!!!!!!

HELP HELP HELP
Asalaamualaikum,

Oh did you by any chance record his voice when he told you he liked you and not your friend? :hiding:

You've done your best ukhti I don't think you can really help your friend much other than make duaa for her Insha Allah. :cry:
Reply

~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:17 PM
why not act like a girl and be strong, don't just loose your hope of this little 'fake love'. Tell this dude and that girl to meet up somewhere along with you and face it up infront of his face. I would love to help you in all means!
Reply

Umm Hurairah
10-25-2007, 03:18 PM
Maybe she already knowz all these things and is hurt but doesn't want to admit it? :cry: Trust me, I know a lot of people like that. :cry:
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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:20 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Hurairah

Asalaamualaikum,

Oh did you by any chance record his voice when he told you he liked you and not your friend? :hiding:

You've done your best ukhti I don't think you can really help your friend much other than make duaa for her Insha Allah. :cry:
I DIDNT RECORD HIM NO BECAUSE I WAS TOTALLY SHOCKED AND AMAZED WHEN THEY RANG MY PHONE...... I KNW THERE AINT MUCH I CAN DO BUT IT HURTS 4 ME 2 SHE HER UPSET SHE VUNERABLE AND NIEVE IN SOME TERMS..... I GUESS ITZ 1ST LOVE??? AS SHE WOULD CALL IT

I WANNA HELP HER AND DAT SIK MAN IS A SICK FOOL 4 LIEIN ABOUT HIS MOTHER AND GRANDMOTHER'S DEATH!!!

IS THAT A NORMAL THING 2 DO NO....imagine what lies he would come up with next....????????????????:mad:
Reply

Woodrow
10-25-2007, 03:21 PM
The young lady just needs to understand one rule:

1. Idle intergender conversation is haram


If she would simply follow rule one, this never would have been a problem.
Reply

~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:23 PM
Yes Woodrow, she needs to get a grip and think twice.
Reply

Umm Hurairah
10-25-2007, 03:25 PM
Originally Posted by Yong_sista
I DIDNT RECORD HIM NO BECAUSE I WAS TOTALLY SHOCKED AND AMAZED WHEN THEY RANG MY PHONE...... I KNW THERE AINT MUCH I CAN DO BUT IT HURTS 4 ME 2 SHE HER UPSET SHE VUNERABLE AND NIEVE IN SOME TERMS..... I GUESS ITZ 1ST LOVE??? AS SHE WOULD CALL IT

I WANNA HELP HER AND DAT SIK MAN IS A SICK FOOL 4 LIEIN ABOUT HIS MOTHER AND GRANDMOTHER'S DEATH!!!

IS THAT A NORMAL THING 2 DO NO....imagine what lies he would come up with next....????????????????:mad:
Asalaamualaikum,

Masha Allah @ your concern for your friend. :thumbs_up

Advise your friend - ( if she's Muslim ) - to pray and maybe, if possible, take her to lectures or just simply to da Masjid?
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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:25 PM
Originally Posted by Woodrow
The young lady just needs to understand one rule:

1. Idle intergender conversation is haram


If she would simply follow rule one, this never would have been a problem.
i know but wot can we do ......now they are in the process of asking for there parents acceptance and respect 2 marry each other,,,,,,,,,

he lied about so many thingz...4 all we knw he wont turn up on the wedding day!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply

Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:27 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Hurairah

Asalaamualaikum,

Masha Allah @ your concern for your friend. :thumbs_up

Advise your friend - ( if she's Muslim ) - to pray and maybe, if possible, take her to lectures or just simply to da Masjid?
i have thankz... i take her 2 masjid and evertyhing and she has even become a memebr on this islamic site where she talks about her love 4 him and talks to shekihas and everything
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Umm Hurairah
10-25-2007, 03:29 PM
Originally Posted by Yong_sista
i have thankz... i take her 2 masjid and evertyhing and she has even become a memebr on this islamic site where she talks about her love 4 him and talks to shekihas and everything
Asalaamualaikum,

Go to a sheikh, if possible, and tell him everything you know about this guy and then ask him for advice Insha Allah.
Reply

Pure Imaan
10-25-2007, 03:29 PM
First and foremost, make dua ukhti, as dua is the weapon of the believer, second of all, make her understand that you are not going out your way to try and ruin her life, tell your friend that she is you friend and that you want to help her. I make dua to Allah (swt) that my friends inshallah will be strong muslims and happiness will fill their lives. I am sure that you want the same for your friend, thus make her understand this, and help her to realise that you want the best for her. your friend will believe you of you show her evidence, so tell her what you have posted on this forum, that he does not study at oxford uni, you cannot study biology in oxford uni. Take your friend to see his grandmother and mother etc.

If she still does not believe you then I pray she will realise sooner rather than later, and I pray this brother will stop playing these games.
Reply

Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:34 PM
Originally Posted by Pure Imaan
First and foremost, make dua ukhti, as dua is the weapon of the believer, second of all, make her understand that you are not going out your way to try and ruin her life, tell your friend that she is you friend and that you want to help her. I make dua to Allah (swt) that my friends inshallah will be strong muslims and happiness will fill their lives. I am sure that you want the same for your friend, thus make her understand this, and help her to realise that you want the best for her. your friend will believe you of you show her evidence, so tell her what you have posted on this forum, that he does not study at oxford uni, you cannot study biology in oxford uni. Take your friend to see his grandmother and mother etc.

If she still does not believe you then I pray she will realise sooner rather than later, and I pray this brother will stop playing these games.
i knw he cant study at oxford because i want on the site and looked at all the courses u can study there i even should her but she was like 'MAYBE WE GOT THE COURSE WRONG' he has made her blind and fall 4 all his sick minded games!!!
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~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:40 PM
Why are you interferring for?
Reply

Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:45 PM
Originally Posted by ~Sam~
Why are you interferring for?
seeming i use 2 go oxford last year then did a transfer now i am at imperial i knw what courses u can and cant do there

thats what u do when u care for a friend ..... he lies through his front teeth and if she cant c that im not going to let him make a fool of an innocent girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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~Sam~
10-25-2007, 03:49 PM
Chill out will you?. If you tried your best and she neglected the fact then why carry on trying?

Ever heard of a dog barking and when does it stop when it's thirsty. Leave her, let her inspire her so called 'Boyfriend' and then she will come running to you. Maybe they might change once they get married to each other or there is a chance for them to sort things out on there 'Own'.
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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 03:53 PM
True but this girl has had so many bad things happen 2 her in the past......

i dont wanna pik up the pieces in the end ...'best before neva'
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00:00
10-25-2007, 03:56 PM
yh, i agree with Sam, you've tried helping her out but she aint listening so y waste your time to someone who's not listening to you, i wouldn't.No women deserves a man like that.
Reply

00:00
10-25-2007, 03:58 PM
1 time when they were meant 2 go to an islamic conference 2getha he came up with this story that his grandmother died and a week later same thing again but this time is mother.....and i know his mother or grandmother didnt die because i have seen them before.........
i tell her he is lieing but she says im jelous which is funi.....
Next time you see them, take a photo of them and show it to her.
Reply

Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 04:00 PM
Originally Posted by 00:00
Next time you see them, take a photo of them and show it to her.
i will do bro
thankz 4 ya help xx
Reply

~Sam~
10-25-2007, 04:02 PM
Yong_Sista you are very keen on helping your friend. This friend of yours is not your true friend because she's ignoring you. If she was a real friend to you she would not have the guts to ignore a friend rather listen to them and sort the situation out. Your so called 'friend' has the nerve to to pull the attitude out and start firing others. She needs to learn about love and not take it as a joke. Well they both need to!

You may think i need to fix up but i don't because you are stressing over a selfish friend of yours, She is very selfish and letting you get involved in this issue aswel. Once a person neglects you then the offer comes to say 'Feed your ownself love'. Just leave her and leave him to there self.

It's time for her to grow up!
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Umm Hurairah
10-25-2007, 04:04 PM
Originally Posted by 00:00
Next time you see them, take a photo of them and show it to her.
Seeing as her friend has made so many excuses before she could easily say that the pic was taken before they died.
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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 04:10 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Hurairah

Seeing as her friend has made so many excuses before she could easily say that the pic was taken before they died.
i guess so called 'LOVE' has made her blind
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00:00
10-25-2007, 04:11 PM
Seeing as her friend has made so many excuses before she could easily say that the pic was taken before they died.
Well than she can take the parents/grandmother to visit her g/f and when she tells them that her bf told her that they had died,the guy will probably end up losing his parents for real and will end up without a wife and parents.
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Yong_sista
10-25-2007, 04:17 PM
I KNOW AND IT WILL B HIS LOSE!!!!

THAT IS A SICK LIE 2 SAY 2 FAKE DEATH ON A PERSON!!!
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Woodrow
10-25-2007, 06:28 PM
All too often when we try to help a friend, we are placing ourselves in the position of becoming an enabler and without realizing it have given them the means to continue with their wrongs. Usually this need only be moral support. Unitentionaly you are giving your friend emotional support to carry on. she has no need of feeling guilt or shame as emotionaly you have assumed that burdan for her and placed her in the posistion she has no need to fear what she does as you have taken on the responsibility of protecting her from her self.

There is times you need to stop trying to teach a friend how to swim. There is a time you need to let them know if they wander into the deep end of the pool they better be ready to swim, because the life guard is off today.
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Maidah
10-25-2007, 06:44 PM
looks like she wants to learn stuff the hard way, well then let her!

i know many ppl who get things come easy to them but they choose to go the hard way, fearing that they might loose out on something.

Her best cure is time, when it all comes back to her face then she will realize how you were trying to help her. Right now even if she does litsen to you which may be unlikely she will always blame you for loosing the guy, unless she gets to see teh other side of him herself.

If she rather go through this herself than simply beleiving you, then i think she is a fool and ppl like her need to then learn a lesson for next time.
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Kittygyal
10-25-2007, 08:55 PM
Salamualikum.

Wow OMG!! Sam has been neat down here. Masha'Allaah go on then sister


There is a time you need to let them know if they wander into the deep end of the pool they better be ready to swim, because the life guard is off today.
Well said Nan agree.

Ma'assalama
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