feel like bonkin 'em really HARD on the head

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

...because they've been spreading rumours about me :-\

[Medina83]

Someone did the exact same to me very recently

a sis I kinda know told a bro whom I had already refused for marriage that i have a boyfriend, smoke and don't pray subhanAllah none of those are true.

the sis wants the bro for marriage but she knew i refused him so not sure why she did that. he then went and gave my number to some other bro who ended up talking to me at the mesjid i was like :scared: who are you?!?!

what a mess people are so misguided

Leave them to think what they want Allah swt knows the truth and have patience, what matters here is that its a test for you and not to let yourself react badly. That is actually the only thing to do. Clarify then ignore. I got a big angry with the bro who gave my number out estaghfirullah. :hiding:

[Al-Zaara]

Aleykum selam,

Ah. Rumours. You're so important to them, they just have to talk about you, be it good or bad. :mmokay: The price for being famous. :cry:

:uhwhat *sigh*


You can't do much, other than clarify the situation to the person who told/asked you about it. You can also ask some reliable friends to clear up the rumours by talking with some other persons who have heard, and inshaAllah gradually people will know the truth.

But ultimatelly you just gotta trust in Allah and make dua that these bad rumours will go away. Whatever you do, stay calm!

[Chyna]

Assalaamu Alaikum,

InshAllah this email reaches you in the best of Iman.

You must remember that when others are speaking about you in your absense, Allah SWT is defending you, without you knowing about it.

Also when people backbite/slander you, their hasanat (if they have any) is taken away from them and given to you. If they dont have any hasanat, then a sin that you may have committed is taken off you and added on to their list SubhanAllah.

People who partake in this sin must not realise just how bad this is for them in this world and in the akhira as it all comes back to them in the end.

So really, its sometimes a good place to be - having someone speak about you, while you collect their hasanat - this is providing that you do not retaliate and do the same back to them. (Good reminder for us that we shouldn't be backbiting/slandering someone)

I cant quite remember the exact reference to the Hadeeth where a Sahaba found out someone was speaking about him in a negative sense, and so he sent this person a bowl of grapes with a note saying "thank you for your hasanat". I think thats wonderful! In fact we should probably do the same to these types of people to let them know what they have just done.

So, as upsetting as it is to find out someone has spread rumours about you, inshAllah just remember that Allah SWT is defending you in your absence.
And your hasanat bank is growing.

And Allah SWT alone gives success.

Was Salaam

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[Isambard]

May I suggest one of those plastic novelty mallets?

Just go crazy! lol :D

[جوري]

:sl:

...because they've been spreading rumours about me :-\

:sl:
you simply can't afford to descend down to every traducer and malingerer.. you have head the adage that By Eleanor R. 'Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people."
what great wisdom is in that?

Believe me, ignoring it, would be the noble thing to do. Might kill you from the inside but you'll have your pride and will maintain your dignity.. and they'll not be able to have anything on you, simply because you are not giving them the chance by dignifying them with a response (of any sort). All they can do is suck on a Styrofoam bone!


:w:

[-Elle-]

Ok...I might be the only one who thinks this but I believe you should definetly confront the person about it.Now,by confronting,I don't mean you go and bite their head off,no,you go and talk to that person,ask them why they said what they said,and try to clear up whatever misconception they have about you.If the person is perposely spreading lies about you,knowing for a fact they aren't true,then simply tell that person,straight in their face,that if they have a problem with you,then they should do the noble thing and tell you straight up.No use in spreading lies about you behind your back,where will that get them?If the person completly dismisses you or continues spreading on these rumors,best thing to do is to take the high road,like the previous posts have mentioned.

I always tell my friends,if I ever do anything that offends you,tell me and we'll talk about it...if these people are your friends,maybe you could try doing the same?If not..just remember "Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter".

:)

Hope it helps!

:w:

[sevgi]

:sl:

at least now u know who not to trust...

God wants u all to himself.trust noone but me....is what hes saying...

:w:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ lol no we can trust others too inshaAllah, we shouldnt be suspicious of anyone ...

if we get hurt... we should just be aware to not get bit by the same snake twice..

[sevgi]

^ lol no we can trust others too inshaAllah, we shouldnt be suspicious of anyone ...

if we get hurt... we should just be aware to not get bit by the same snake twice..

nope...ive been hurt enuf to trust no one.and i dnt get hurt easily.i found my comfort in thinking that Allah wanted me all to himself.lol...i grew up gettn hurt.i had noone else.ever.no human anyway.

im starting to trust one person tho.may Allah guide my heart and mind.

so maybe...we can trust some people.just be very very careful.be selective.be logical.be contained and collected at all times.and be urself..all that at the same time is hard...but as u repress...u express to Allah inshallah.

peace.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ ok but certain people actually do deserve our trust... i suppose it takes time to earn it.

but still, try not to be too suspicious lol, if someone does something hoping to help you and keep you happy then try not to look for ulterior motives... it might have a detrimental affect

[Medina83]

^^ i am not able to trust anyone anymore . I feel paranoid .
There was one person I used to be able to trust completely and that was myself. So when I trusted my own judgement to trust someone else recently (nothing to do with what I posted above in this thread) and that person betrayed me, I felt so stupid like I should have known. Like I fell for all of the lies and cunningness. Now other people pay for the mistakes of someone else because I am exactly as you say, overly suspicious and paranoid of ulterior motives.

And I dont know how to change that.

[Re.TiReD]

:sl:

...because they've been spreading rumours about me :-\

:salamext:

Ahh! The misguided few cant keep from spreading rumours...hmm so what would I do? I'd hit the root of the problem, the people spreading the rumours and ask them why?? simple really :) if you cant do that...then pray for their guidance Insha'Allah :w:

[aminahjaan]

I feel like slappin people as well, but everyone talks about everyone, if its not you, its yer mom, or your car, or your hair or whatever. Everyone's just jealous! Time heals everything. don't worry. Ignore it! Remember how when Prophet Esa's(AS)mother gave birth to him, even though she'd never done anything with anyone, Allah gave her the baby? Eveyrone started really nasty rumors about her, but Allah commanded her not to speak for a day? Tell the truth only once and just be quite don't go convincing everyone you know? So hang in there, I've been there and done that, it helped. :)

[tigersabre]

imam abu hanifa I believe came to a man and gave him a gift, and the man said, what's this for, and Imam Abu Hanifa told him, for the reward I took from you for your backbiting of me.

There's reward, so take it, and tell who needs to know that what was said is not true.