Marriage Problems

[AnonymousPoster]

salaam
i recently asked a girl to marry me, but she declined, i am really having trouble getting over this, what shoud i do?
thanks
ps, i did aproach the girl in a halal manner

[جوري]

There is so much that goes into a marriage including a psychological readiness and commitment... sometimes there he is , the most perfect one and you are just not ready..

a couple of years ago I was proposed to by what is considered to many to be the perfect gent. really perfect in every way, he was really a sweet person and wasn't imposing not to mention incredibly goregeous (yes I know I shouldn't stare) but I am being forth coming!
He would always leave me M&M's by my work station, send me in to see his patients then write my student notes for me ( was his way of showing care) needless to say I was getting over someone who had died, so I had to decline without getting into too much detail. And I pray to Allah he has found his special someone because he was/is a special person!
your take home message pls...know that it might not have anything to do with you at all, in fact you can be nothing short of perfect.. try to consider that marriage isn't just about your feelings and own financial and physical readiness but also someone else's.. Someone you'll take for a partner and for life!

I wouldn't normally have shared such a personal story with that much detail, but honestly, I think the faster you can accept the complexity of human emotions, the faster you can move on and insha'Allah, Allah will guide you to the one who is meant for you and you for her..


:w:

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:
dont feel so bad, there're are plenty of fish in the sea. when the next suitable lady comes by, you're probably going to be thinking: Is that what i was worried about? :X you'd be suprised. would you prefer someone to marry you, who isnt that interest you?

your take home message pls...know that it might not have anything to do with you at all, in fact you can be nothing short of perfect.. try to consider that marriage isn't just about your feelings and own financial and physical readiness but also someone else's.. Someone you'll take for a partner and for life!

nicely said!!:thumbs_up:thumbs_up:thumbs_up
:sl:

[Jayda]

salaam
i recently asked a girl to marry me, but she declined, i am really having trouble getting over this, what shoud i do?
thanks
ps, i did aproach the girl in a halal manner

hola

i am very sorry you experienced this, sometimes despite everything you might have in common and despite being an attractive, sweet or good person a girl just does not feel the kind of connection she needs to feel in order to have a relationship with you or marry you. it is best to trust her judgment and to not pursue the issue any further and to not try to ask her again. this is romantic in movies but in real life it is not something that should be done. i think the best thing for you would be to not think of this as a reflection on you, just a judgment by her about the nature of your relationship to each other. then accept that it will sting and be difficult for some time... but that it will pass. you will be okay!

que Dios te bendiga

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[islamic]

salaam
i recently asked a girl to marry me, but she declined, i am really having trouble getting over this, what shoud i do?
thanks
ps, i did aproach the girl in a halal manner

Well, you maybe want to marry her, but she doesn't want to marry you. Try to find a girl with whom you will share love between each other, so, the marriage proposal will be just formal and without declining.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullaah

even sahaabi's got refused so dont take it personal, ya akhee, tis only dunya
the daughter of abu bakr radhiallahu anhu reject Umar radhiallahu anhu!! SUBHANALLAh

you'll get a beautiful pious wife inshaAllaah !!


assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullaah

[islamic]

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullaah

even sahaabi's got refused so dont take it personal, ya akhee, tis only dunya
the daughter of abu bakr radhiallahu anhu reject Umar radhiallahu anhu!! SUBHANALLAh

you'll get a beautiful pious wife inshaAllaah !!


assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullaah

beautiful brother, great, :smile:

[Grace Seeker]

Kudos to all for a thread filled with excellent advice.

[tigersabre]

1. Accept that at this time, she's not for you.

2. Get excited about the journey to find the one who IS for you.

3. Most importantly, Allah subhaana wa ta'aala is the One that controls the heart, so ask Him to help you with this.

4. Any time you find yourself dwelling on this girl, find something good and healthy you like to do, and do that instead.

[niler]

i can understand hw hurt u maybe but its d will of God and its not maktub.
inshAllah ul get a better one.
just think of this ( it myt help)
Allah wants wat is best 4 u,wat u want is not neccessarily the best thing.
He knows Ghaib u dont,
maybe u wont be compartible n it will result in heatache 4 both of u.
pray to Allah 2 give a better person .. but dont feel like ot good enough 4 her or.. i guess u know wat am sayin
Am prayin 4 u..