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brooding
12-10-2007, 01:16 AM
Salam aleikum!

I’m a non-Muslim girl writing from Sweden, couldn’t find a good Swedish forum for my question. I just started to study with a practicing Muslim guy (Shiite). We have connected very well as I’m very open to Islam and his way of living but also very interested. We have hanged out a lot and he takes me to different Islamic events and Muslim organizations. We have never touched each other (of course) and he keeps the rule of no physical contact with the opposite sex very strict. Even though, he wants to see me a lot and he gives me a lot of compliments all the time. The whole situation have resulted in that I’m starting to fall in love with him and want to be with him as more than a friend. My question is now if there is any chance that that can happen and if there is worth even think about it? What does Islam say about these things? He told me ones that the only thing he needs from me to marry me (and what he have told me there is a time set marriage for something that seems to be like the western boyfriend girlfriend relationship) is that I can’t be atheist, which I’m definitely not! Maybe it is very hard to answer this question but I just want to get a hint, I don’t want to insult him and his believe, but I’m thinking about to tell him about my feelings. HELP!
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adeeb
12-24-2007, 09:14 AM
relationship between boy and girl in Islam is unique, all based on quran and hadith.

your boy friend is shiite, so he has his own hadith,but that's still not allowed to have relationship out side marriage.

if u want to have relationship with him, you have to get married with him.

he meant that u have to believe in God, you have to be muslim, Christian or Jew, so he can marry you. Most of the scholar said, that muslim man should marry with muslim women. but some of them said that it's Ok if muslim man marry with a christian or jew women.

maybe that's the reason why you can't be atheist to be his wife...

please correct me if i make mistake in this reply.

thanks
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al_islam
12-27-2007, 12:02 PM
Yes you are right.

With regards to marriage they have to be chriatian or jewish.

What your friend is referring to is temporary marriage. Sunni say that it is not allowed but shia practise it openly. It is not a real marriage, rather a contract within a time period. Shia think it makes it ok to have physical relations within this contract but they are wrong. It is called Muta, but he is saying contract to you.

It is pretty much a myth and he just wants to be able to touch you. Sorry to be frank, but there is no Islamic basis for thsi.

Also be aware of Shia practises as they are not all islamic, or by the sunnah or even by the Ahlul Baht AS !!
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