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AnonymousPoster
12-14-2007, 08:38 PM
salamz sorry for this post but it was either writing it here or be depressed:cry: i feel really really lonely!
i am from africa but was raised here so i cant really speak my language and because of this reason some people give me a hard time look down at me and even make assumptions it might not sound like a big deal but is making my life hell and feel depressed.

Also i havent got many friends and for some reason find it difficult to get on with girls (muslims) 90% of the ones i come across act like they above me even through i practise and cover too.

Is quite sad but i feel like there arent any nice geniune girls or women out there.

Today I helped a lady out she broke her leg and wetted herself so i cleaned her up changed her bedsheet and all she could say was how can you not know your lang. whos your mother?:grumbling:cry:
thats before she started to backbite so loudly i could even hear her.
This is after i cleaned her and helped her.
I am generally a nice person and love to help others even if is something as small as making them smile and what i get is grief by this ungrateful ladies who are covered yet behave in such way!
:mad:
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Tania
12-15-2007, 04:37 AM
1. Never ever help anyone. The police warned us several times about the fact we can turn in victims. The woman could easilly accused you about stealing from her house or something. Because its the season when many people fall on the ice or snow , don't help them either.
2. You should not be bother about how do you speak your native language. I speak it how i can :). My native language its hungarian and i am not really good at it even if i speak with my parents in hungarian. 3 words hungarian and one romanian :p
3. The people in this days look a little bit dumb at people ,like you, who are so generous. You should learn fast to be like the others, never do something above them.
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AHMED_GUREY
12-15-2007, 04:48 AM
:sl:
Sister don't worry my extended family sometimes gives my sister a hard time because she has difficulty speaking our language but this in itself means nothing cause she speaks 4 languages

There will always be ignorant individuals who like to degrade another individual to feel better about themselves. Those people suffer from inferiority complexes or pseudo-superiority complexes (or they are simply plain ignorant of their own arrogance)

My advice would be to focus on positive individuals in your life and ignore those that speak ill of you just remind yourself being sinister is all they have and they are giving you valuable Hasanats for their backbiting.

basically they have no life. Tell them to get a life lool:D i'm joking just don't focus on their backbiting:)
:w:
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north_malaysian
12-15-2007, 06:47 AM
Luckily I am a Penangite, where we mix so many languages in one sentence:shade:

My first language is Penangite Malay (which is NORMAL to mix Malay, English, Hokkien, Tamil, Arabic, Persian, Thai etc. in one sentence).

But my pronounciation is a lil bit different than everyone else... (I dont know why, maybe becoz I never eat "durian" :D).

But it's not an issue as people care about understanding whatever you say rather than checking your pronounciation or grammar.

The most important thing in communication is not the language, but whether the other party knows your message.

Peace!!!:peace:
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genki
12-15-2007, 08:27 AM
Be more confident in yourself and dont let every little thing from others affect you. Some people are just arrogant and think they are better than others.
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Tania
12-15-2007, 12:19 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
AsalamuAleykum jazajkalla khair for your replies i work in a hospital tanya but she wasnt one of my patients thanks for your help).
Ohhh, i thought at something else. :-[
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AnonymousPoster
12-15-2007, 01:58 PM
AsalamuAleykum jazajkalla khair for your replies i work in a hospital tanya but she wasnt one of my patients thanks for your help:)
ahmed thanks bro seriously people from my country make the biggest deal out of not knowing the language to the point where they blame your mother which gets me:offended: Genky i dont let it get to me but if they try to `blame` my family that angers me! I will let Allahswt deal with them.
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glo
12-15-2007, 04:17 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
salamz sorry for this post but it was either writing it here or be depressed:cry: i feel really really lonely!
i am from africa but was raised here so i cant really speak my language and because of this reason some people give me a hard time look down at me and even make assumptions it might not sound like a big deal but is making my life hell and feel depressed.

Also i havent got many friends and for some reason find it difficult to get on with girls (muslims) 90% of the ones i come across act like they above me even through i practise and cover too.

Is quite sad but i feel like there arent any nice geniune girls or women out there.

Today I helped a lady out she broke her leg and wetted herself so i cleaned her up changed her bedsheet and all she could say was how can you not know your lang. whos your mother?:grumbling:cry:
thats before she started to backbite so loudly i could even hear her.
This is after i cleaned her and helped her.
I am generally a nice person and love to help others even if is something as small as making them smile and what i get is grief by this ungrateful ladies who are covered yet behave in such way!
:mad:
Greetings, anonymous

Loneliness is a horrible feeling, and I can imagine how it is affecting you.

Can I ask why some people look down on you for not speaking your native language? Presumably those people are from the same African country as you originally are?

Straddling two cultures can be a difficult thing, and can make you feel like you don't belong to either group.
Try to look at it positively: rather than not completely belong to either group, you have a great advantage of being a combination of both cultures!
That makes you a great ambassador, a bridge between two worlds. Be proud about it! Use it! :)


Remember that Islam prides itself of being inclusive of all Muslims - regardless of colour or nationality, and certainly regardless of what language you speak.

Remember that God made you special. You are unique, and there is nobody like you!

When I feel low in confidence, or worry about what others may think of me, I remember Psalm 39. It says:
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
May God bless you abundantly, sister. :thankyou:
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tigersabre
12-16-2007, 04:41 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
salamz sorry for this post but it was either writing it here or be depressed:cry: i feel really really lonely!
i am from africa but was raised here so i cant really speak my language and because of this reason some people give me a hard time look down at me and even make assumptions it might not sound like a big deal but is making my life hell and feel depressed.

Also i havent got many friends and for some reason find it difficult to get on with girls (muslims) 90% of the ones i come across act like they above me even through i practise and cover too.

Is quite sad but i feel like there arent any nice geniune girls or women out there.

Today I helped a lady out she broke her leg and wetted herself so i cleaned her up changed her bedsheet and all she could say was how can you not know your lang. whos your mother?:grumbling:cry:
thats before she started to backbite so loudly i could even hear her.
This is after i cleaned her and helped her.
I am generally a nice person and love to help others even if is something as small as making them smile and what i get is grief by this ungrateful ladies who are covered yet behave in such way!
:mad:
I can't speak of any my country's native tongues, but I tell people who ask me about it that it's my parents' fault because they only spoke English around me.

You'll have to explain more about your situation with other girls, and give examples of situations that you've had.
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welcome_islam
12-16-2007, 01:30 PM
dont worry about what people say about u speaking in ur language. i cant even speak in urdu or punjabi( only abit), i speak english at home.

if u want to learn ur language, ask ur parents or anyone who can help u 2 learn the language
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Kittygyal
12-16-2007, 02:20 PM
Assalamualikum.

I can't speak any other language apart from my mother language 'English' as i was rasied from a Catholic family, Although im learning arabic now..

Anywho be proud init, ignore 'em.. atleast you know how to talk in whatever language just RELAX man

Also, Allaah knows your intentions sis.. don't get angry just do whats right and if they don't appreciate it then Allaah will deal with this later Insha'Allaah. If someone ios being nasty to you, you be twice as nice to them :)

Ma'assalama
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جوري
05-22-2008, 10:42 PM
You belong to Allah swt and to his Muslim umma..
and we are as varied as can be .. there is no room for lonliness there is much to do anon.. all you have to do is resolve in your mind to do something and then you are on your way to doing it.. if it is to learn a new language, then start today...

other than that, pls don't judge yourself by petty minds around you.. no one is immune from the stupidity of other people... it is more their problem than yours..
it is unfortunate that not everyone can be adorned with fine manners.. what you can do however is if you can't change someone's attitude, best to try to react differently to what they do to rouse your anger and/or sadness..

:w:
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