wa 'alykum asalam warahmatulahi wabarakatuh.
All praise is due to Allah. We praise him, and seek his help and forgiveness. We seek refuge in Allah, most high from the evils of our
own selves and from our wicked deeds. Whomever Allah guides can not be misguided, and whomever he leads astray can not be
guided. I testify that there is no true God worthy of being worshipped except Allah, alone, without partner or associate. I further testify
that Muhammad is his slave and messenger, may Allah’s salaah and salam also be granted to the prophet’s pure family and to all of
his noble companions.
masha Allah its really good u wna become a better muslimah and you have a good intention. remember that any action that takes place - begins with a intention, and because you have a good intention insha Allah, you have already taken your 1st step insha Allah.
to start off ...praying your 5 salaahs in the day is fardh (compulsary) and if one leaves them altogether, then it is a sign of kuffar.
Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his beloved family) said, "Between a man and disbelief and paganism is the abandonment of Salat (prayer).''
[Muslim].
ibn `umar (may Allah be pleased with them) reported: the messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his beloved family) said, "I have been commanded to fight against the people till they testify la ilaha illAllah (there is no true god except Allah) and that muhammad (pbuh) is His slave and messenger, and to establish As-Salat (Iqamat-as-Salat), and to pay Zakat; and if they do this, then their blood and property are secured except by
the rights of Islam, and their accountability is left to Allah.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Buraidah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "That which differentiates us from the disbelievers and hypocrites is our performance of Salat. He who abandons it, becomes a disbeliever.''
[At-Tirmidhi].
imagine a building.. the building is supported by pillars to keep it upheld. now if someone gets rid of one of the pillars or it is destroyed - the rest of the building (even if the remainder of the pillars are there) will collapse - this is because the building was made to stay erect on 5pillars.. the same applies to our salaah, if we follow the other pillars, but leave one of them out - our faith will collapse and we will probably lose our faith altogether, therefore its necessary that we keep all of the pillars strong/firm to keep our iman (faith) strong.
to start off - its good to have a timetable which shows what time which salaah starts. (if you dont have one - please ask and insha Allah we will look up on the net for one.) make your intention that you will pray your salaah when the day begins. [in ramadhan its alot easier to wake up for fajr because one has to wake up to close their fast (sehri/suhoor)] its even good to buy a alarm clock which you can set the time on to remind yourself when the prayer starts. gradually build up on the amount of times you perform salaah a day and tell yourself its compulsary and that if one doesn't pray salaah.. it has really bad consequences and that will be one of the first things asked on qiyamah.
your main objective is to complete all that is obligatory, even if this means not performing what is supererogatory (optional). tell yourself that it is only 5 prayers per day and in reality - it isn't even really that much. tell yourself you have to do it and there isn't an option of missing them..
like the brothers and sisters have mentioned already, about going to the masjid. is there a problem with that? like does your husband allow you to go there? if so - that would be really good masha Allah and you could go and ask when the sisters times are or you could even ask your husband to ask the imam, if that is possible insha Allah. that way you could focus on the holy qur'an more and discuss it with other sisters there, you could even talk to them how you entered islam and insha Allah they should help you to become a even better muslimah with Allah (swt)'s help.
i know i havnt focused on the other concepts but it would be really useful to get some feedback if the above options could take place.
insha Allah plz do keep posting back on the forum of your progress and remember to always stay calm with your husband.. this way he'll notice that your not tired of him or atleast thing that your working hard insha Allah.. cz if this was the case - he would probably get angry and ignore what you say, so please try your best to remain calm and patient with him - because this is a big problem with some of us 'born muslims'. we tend to think that islam is forced upon us and therefore we want to enjoy life while young and focus when we're older.. but masha Allah with the revert brothers and sisters - they come into islam and find the peace within it and they tend to be even better/strict muslims than the 'born muslims'.
Allah u a'lam (Allah (swt) knows best).
i know i havnt responded to your questions properly but masha Allah alot of brothers and sisters have given really good interesting answers insha Allah which could benefit.
just keep in mind that you should stick to your fardh (compulsary) (inc. your other duties such as zakaat,hajj etc. - you can discuss this later if this is a problem insha Allah.), this includes the salaah (5 prayers in the day), the jilbab:
And say to the faithful women to lower their gazes, and to guard their private parts, and not to display their adornment except what is apparent of it, and to extend their headcoverings (khimars) to cover their bosoms (jaybs), and not to display their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband's fathers, or their sons, or their husband's sons, or their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their womenfolk, or what their right
hands rule (slaves), or the followers from the men who do not feel sexual desire, or the small children to whom the nakedness of
women is not apparent, and not to strike their feet (on the ground) so as to make known what they hide of their adornments. And turn
in repentance to Allah together, O you the faithful, in order that you are successful. (surah nur - 24: ayah 31)
no matter what your husband says, tell him its fardh on you, this is why you came to islam - to follow it. [the definition of islam is '
submission' - to
submit yourself to Allah (swt)]. when you explain how u feel, try to stay calm and dont shout at him.. always remember to keep praying and plz dont lose faith in Allah (swt) because your prayers are always being listened to insha Allah.
Abu Hurairah reported, "The Prophet, peace be upon him, said,
"Nothing is more dear to Allah than one's supplication to Him.''
Abu Hurairah also reported, "The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, 'Whoever wants Allah to answer his prayers during difficult times, should supplicate to Him more and more in times of ease'.''
(Tirmizhi)
so remember, keep praying through the hard and easy times and insha Allah your prayers will be answered, just remember to remain patient and steadfast and firm in faith, believe that Allah (swt) has power over all things and that your prayers will be answered insha Allah.
“And Allah loves those who are patient” (Surah Imran: 3:146).
Hadith - Transmitted by Tirmidhi, Narrated Umm Salamah
Our beloved Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: If a woman dies while her husband was pleased with her, she will enter Paradise.
may Allah (swt) send peace and blessings upon our beloved prophet and his beloved family. ameen. may Allah (swt) guide us all, correct all our affairs, make us steadfast and let us die for Allah (swt)'s sake only as true believers. ameen.
wasalam o 'alykum warahmatulahi wabarakatuh.