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Buying etiquette

  1. #1
    Umm Abed's Avatar Full Member
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    Buying etiquette

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    Sometimes you enter a shop, it is half empty, and it can be an awkward feeling because you feel that you'r obliged to buy.

    Does anyone feel like that? And if you'r a shopkeeper, do you expect people to buy always whenever they enter your shop?
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    ardianto's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    Assalamualaikum.

    When I enter a shop I always intend to buy something. Then if I didn't find what I want to buy in that shop I don't feel obliged to buy something there. The feeling obliged to buy happen because we enter a shop with intention just to "look around", but then the warm welcome of the shopkeeper make us feel ashamed if we just look around but don't buy something. Different than if we enter shop with intention to buy something. If we could not find the stuff that we want to buy, then we have a reason to not buy something that we don't need there.

    And if I was shopkeeper?. Hmm, ..... not "if" for me. I am businessman in retail market, so basically I am a shopkeeper. Okay. Do I expect every visitor to buy something?. Of course. But I do not mind if a visitor come just because want to look around or even just want to compare the price, and I never urge him/her to buy. From my experience, the visitor who just look around today, probably will come again to buy tomorrow.
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    Umm Abed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    Wa alaikum salam

    You seem to be a very experienced buyer/seller; thats true as you say, if I enter a shop looking for something and cannot find the item, leave without buying, it makes it easier than just coming in to browse and out again. Even in that case I do feel a tinge of guilt for not buying something.

    As for myself, I feel its a burden on the shopkeeper, having to show you many items and end up not buying, but yeah it all comes down to being practical - buy what you want and not wasting the shopkeeper's time if browsing is all that you want to do. Im saying this generally.

    Any other comments, welcome.
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    Scimitar's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    no shopkeeper feels burdened when showing a customer their wares, it is simply his job as a business owner to show his products off to his customers.

    there shall be no compulsion to buy anything from a store

    Scimi
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    Umm Abed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    format_quote Originally Posted by Scimitar View Post
    no shopkeeper feels burdened when showing a customer their wares, it is simply his job as a business owner to show his products off to his customers.

    there shall be no compulsion to buy anything from a store

    Scimi
    You'r right - there is no compulsion to buy, thats one thing, but as a customer I do feel awkward not buying something lol is that too much on my part? Probably. It feels as Im leaving the shopkeeper 'stranded', not to say he depends only on my buying as a customer, if that makes sense.
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    ardianto's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    format_quote Originally Posted by Umm Abed View Post
    You'r right - there is no compulsion to buy, thats one thing, but as a customer I do feel awkward not buying something lol is that too much on my part? Probably. It feels as Im leaving the shopkeeper 'stranded', not to say he depends only on my buying as a customer, if that makes sense.
    If a man enter a shop with intention only to have a look, then he would not touch anything. While if a woman enter a shop only to have a look, she often act like a visitor who want to buy. Take some products from display rack, pose in front of mirror with a leather handbag that for sale. Of course it makes the shopkeeper thinks and hope she would buy. Yeah, it could make this woman feel awkward if she didn't buy anything there.

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    Alpha Dude's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    Remind me to open a shop near you.
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    Scimitar's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    @Umm Abed ... alhamdulillah for ebay then?

    Scimi
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    Lady A's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    It might be awkward to enter a small shop and not buy anything. But hey, if the shop doesn't have what I need I don't need to waste my hard earned money. No need to feel guilty about it.

    A lot of "Islamic" shops around here carry abayas. They always order a standard size (which won't fit me), so I'll have a look and walk out!

    Once a lady at masjid was selling abayas and she called me aside and said she has the perfect size for me. I said I don't want it. But she insisted I go home and try it on. And she quoted the price of $20. The next day, I guess I forgot to bring it back to masjid and didn't want her to think I was stealing it. And my mom went to pay for it and she bumped the price to $30. So, I lost $30 and gained a big fat abaya that didn't fit. Since then I'm a cruel shopper and I feel no guilt walking out. Anytime I feel hassled by the shopkeeper I put a firm foot down.

    (new font, what say?)
    Last edited by Lady A; 08-05-2015 at 03:48 AM.
    Buying etiquette


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    Umm Abed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    @sci mi, yes online buying seems to be the 'in' thing atm, its really popular, I think people enjoy opening those parcels as if they'r gifts
    @Lady A , that sounds like a typical scammer, Id be very wary of people who force you to buy something. You should stand your ground on these type of sellers, very annoying yeah.
    @Alphadude , hope you make my shopping experience a good one.
    @ardianto , good observer you are
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    ardianto's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    format_quote Originally Posted by Scimitar View Post
    there shall be no compulsion to buy anything from a store
    But how if the consumer 'compel' the shopkeeper to sell?.

    When I still had cellphone top-up business there was a man who visited my top-up stall. He was a 40's man, looked from middle class, and drove a car that new enough. As you know, the profit of top-up is very thin. However, he still bid in price that even lower than the price which I bought. Of course I said "no!". But bro, instead of go, he chose to stay in my stall. And with 'innocent face' repeatedly he ask me "may I get top-up in that price?". Finally I said "Okay!, okay!" as the only way to make him go.
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    Umm Abed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    @ardianto this seems like a case where the buyer is manipulating the seller into selling the item and I feel its wrong to put pressure on him to sell at a cheaper price than stipulated, which brings me to another character in the shopping world, and that is haggling.

    How do you guys feel about haggling, is it morally acceptable to pressurise the seller into reducing the price of his items?

    Id like to hear your thoughts
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    ardianto's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    format_quote Originally Posted by Umm Abed View Post
    How do you guys feel about haggling, is it morally acceptable to pressurise the seller into reducing the price of his items?

    Id like to hear your thoughts
    If the seller open an opportunity to negotiate, certainly I will bid at a decent price. Of course, I can tolerate if the seller wants a higher price. And if I am sure that my bid already good while the price that requested by the seller is still too high, then I can give a bit of pressure such as "If you do not give me at this price, then I will not buy". But I never bid price based on a feeling of wanting to win.

    For consumers, can buy good stuff at cheap prices is a success. Unfortunately there are people who are obsessed with the 'win' this. This is what makes them can suppress the seller excessively. When the seller has given a lot of tolerance and the price is already cheap, they still continued to pressurise, and even create an atmosphere that can force the sellers to follow what they want.

    The principle of buying and selling is a "win-win" which sellers and buyers equally satisfied, not the "win-lose" which one feels satisfied and one feels defeated.

    Of course the buyer can ask the seller to reduce price. But the buyer must still hold etiquette in bid such as:
    - It's okay to bid in low price as the first bid, but must still in decent price, not the very low price that unreasonable.
    - If the seller still doesn't give in the last bid, the buyer should not force the seller.
    - The buyer must avoid provocative words like telling that the goods which the seller offer is too bad.
    - If the price that requested by the seller is higher than other sellers, the buyer can tell it, but must avoid provocative attitude like telling "Ah, it's better if I buy from other seller!".
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    Umm Abed's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Buying etiquette

    Hey ardianto thanks for your in depth reply I really appreciate it.

    Yes I get what you'r saying, where the buyer literally manipulates the seller into selling the item for a much lesser price. You know for some people its become a habit - a bad habit, just to insist on lower price just because they think they can do it - and win, no doubt its frustrating to the seller.

    I agree with you that both sides must be happy, but the seller will only be happy if the consumer/buyer hasnt forcefully made him lower the price. The points which you have raised are good ones which people must adhere to.

    Any person with a little bit of good consciousness would not degrade the seller in any way.
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