40 days after a funeral

I think you should post this thread in "Clarification about Islam" section and i have no problem where you post your threads

Talking about your question,i dont think there is something like that in Islam.Its a regional practice.Mourn for your loved ones like your Parents/siblings and others only allowed for 3 days while for husband it is for 4 months and ten days.

I found this for you

Weeping and Mourning over the Dead

Muslim scholars agree that weeping for the dead is permissible, whereas crying out loud and wailing are not. The Prophet (s.a.w) said: "The one who is wailed for is tortured on account of it." Abu Musa is reported to have said: "I declare my disavowal of all that Allah's Messenger disavowed. The Messenger of Allah disavowed publicly a woman who mourns loudly, one who shaves her head, and the one who tears her clothes in mourning." It is permissible for a woman to mourn for a period of three days over the death of a near relative. The Islamic term for mourning is Hidaad. Mourning for more than three days is not permitted except in the case of her husband's death. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w) said: "It is not permissible for a woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to mourn over a dead person more than three days, except for her husband, where she mourns for four months and ten days." A women whose husband has must observe what is known as the 'Iddah - The waiting period before she may remarry, which is four month and ten days. During this period a widow is not permitted to use any adornment, such as jewelry, kohl (eye-makeup), silk, perfume, or henna dye on her hands and feet. A widow during her 'iddah is permitted to leave her home to fulfill her economic and social needs. If for example she works to sustain her family, she may continue to leave her home daily for the period of work. Apart from leaving the house for necessities and social visits to relatives and friends, a widow during her 'iddah should pass the night in her own home until her term lapses, that is, she is not to sleep outside of her house.

This is widespread in asian communities. I actually used to do this, although i had no idea why, it was sumthin i was bought up knowing, but ive broken away from it now, although others seem less convinced. Its custom to do something on the 4th, 15th and then either 35th or 40th day, but as others have sed it is nothing to do with islam.

format_quote Originally Posted by abdulmājid

Also to add to this, a party is thrown when a baby is 40 days old. This is also bid'ah but if someone could explain this to me...i'd be very grateful. This is very common in asian countries.

I went to an aqeeqah party recently for a newborn ? i had no idea what it was, or whether this is permissable. I suppose the 40 day thing, wud be cos women only go out after 40 days of giving birth ? again i think this is cultural ?

format_quote Originally Posted by abdulmājid

uh-huh, aqeeqah is different, aqeeqah is done on the 7th day of the birth. I am talking about the 40th day party. Aqeeqah is Sunnah, Chilla is bid'ah

oh ok ? i didnt know, it kinda defeated the object of having one, considering it was a mixed environment, and no point to the whole thing. whats chilla ? Im not aware of the 40th thing ? as a pakistani, i thort we did all the biddah things, not this one though.

According to one explanation it's origin is based on the fact that after delivery the post-natal thing occurs for about 6 weeks i.e 40 days.

I am not sure though, a highly experienced bid'ahti/innovator can answer this.

My mother actually has told us the children that she does NOT want us to hold a 7th-day or 40th-day "tahlilan" for her when she dies. It is very common here in Indonesia, but it is definitely a serious bid'ah and has its roots from hindu tradition.
"tahlilan" is usually held during the first 7 days after a person died, the 40th and the 1000th day. Relatives and neighbours are invited to gather at the deceased's house to recite Yaa Sin (QS. Yaa Sin), make du'as and read some dhikrs and eat from the specially prepared food by the family.
In many cases, a lot of money are spent to hold these '"tahlilan" because the family usually are also expected to print little books containing yaa sin and collections of "mustahhab" du'as.

My mother told us to just read the Qur'an ourselves and continuously make du'as for her and be the best muslims, because that would actually help her in the hereafter: du'as from own, pious children.

format_quote Originally Posted by glo

Can somebody explain to me what the significance of the 40th day after a funeral is, and why and how it is commemorated in Islam?

Thank you.

(Mods, I am not sure where best to put this thread. Please move if necessary)

I actually follow this rule, I was brought up doing so. I can't say for sure but I think it has to do with Arba'een (forty) being a significant number in Islam, Shias commemorate 40 days after the day of Ashura which when Imam Husayn(pbuh) was killed. Following this example, we also mourn for 40 days after the death of a loved one.

Also, a famous saying from Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) states that 'On the day of judgement, among my people, God will consider whoever memorised forty Hadiths as an erudite man.'

its always good to keep an open mind and expand upon one's knowledge, as long as it's from a reliable ahlus sunnah Scholar

i feared shirk a great deal for the Berelvi Hanafi's and would have regarded this '40 day' thing as bidah, however, not anymore:

... the point of mentioning these six questions is that not one of them is a genuine ‘aqida issue, in the sense of being a central tenet of faith that no one can disagree about and remain a believer. rather, all of the main‘aqida -related issues the barelwis and deobandis disagree about can be legitimately debated and differed upon by muslims without either side having left islam.

as previously noted, this applies with even greater force to fiqh issues differed upon by barelwis and deobandis, such as milad celebrations of the birthday of the prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace), the definition of bid‘a or “reprehensible innovation,” or the practice of setting aside particular days to send the reward of spiritual works to the souls of the departed. imam ghazali, ibn al-qayyim, ibn qudama al-maqdisi, and other scholars have noted that things whose blameworthiness imams of fiqh disagree about are not permissible to condemn, since it is a condition for something to be considered munkar or “condemnable” that this be concurred upon by all, not merely established through ijtihad of one scholar rather than another.

https://www.scribd.com/document/174576574/Iman-Kufr-And-Takfir-by-Nuh-Keller