I don't understand why men are allowed to dress fashionably, style their hair, are able to show their body except for their awrah and be able to sing and dance while women can't wear minimal makeup, have to wear baggy clothes, their clothes have to be unfashionable and dark, can't speak loudly or laugh in public, they can't sing, recite or dance either.
Why do women need to hide themselves so much when men don't?
I don't understand why men are allowed to dress fashionably, style their hair, are able to show their body except for their awrah and be able to sing and dance while women can't wear minimal makeup, have to wear baggy clothes, their clothes have to be unfashionable and dark, can't speak loudly or laugh in public, they can't sing, recite or dance either.
Why do women need to hide themselves so much when men don't?
Assalaamu alaykum wa rahmatullah,
I haven't read all the replies on this thread, so please forgive me if I am repeating what has been said before.
In Islaam, both men and women adhere to what the Shariah has stated.
Men are not permitted to 'sing' and 'dance' either.
Hayaa (Modesty) is a huge part of Islaam, (alhamdulillaah) which we have been blessed with.
Men and women are both required to dress appropriately and behave in the appropriate manner in public.
You can laugh/joke/play etc with female friends and even your Mahrams, there's no restriction on you in any way.
However, the restrictions you feel are there, are in fact to protect us women from the evils of society.
Since outside is the men's world, per the sunnah they should go outside presentable and not looking like homeless bums. It does not mean they can go out and do whatever they want, they too have islamic guidelines they have to follow in how they carry themselves and how they conduct their affairs.
Women can wear makeup, dance, sing and fashionably do other stuff but inside their house among their mahrams, not outside in front of non-mahrams. This not only causes fitna for men but she also dishonor and devalues herself in such a careless manner. The west teaches us that it's "freedom", when all they are doing is objectifying you for the pleasure of their eyes.
Men and women were created with different roles in society. Men's role is dealing with the affairs of the outside while the women's role is dealing with the affairs inside the house.
Allah says,
“And abide quietly in your homes, and do not flaunt your charms as they used to flaunt them in the old days of pagan ignorance; and be constant in prayer, and render the purifying dues, and pay heed unto Allah and His Messenger: for Allah only wants to remove from you all that might be loathsome, O you members of the [Prophet’s] household, and to purify you to utmost purity.” [33:33]
According to Tafsir ibn Kathir, “And stay in your houses” means “stay in your houses and do not come out except for a purpose. According to Tafsir Maududi, the verse means to impress that the woman’s real sphere of activity is her home; she should carry out her functions within that sphere peacefully, and she should come out of the house only in case of a genuine need.
People keep saying that it's because women are supposed to be protected, but how is it a good thing if it becomes difficult to go about our daily lives without having to worry about so many things. I'm sure if a man looked good, girls would look at him and be attracted. Why is it different if it's a woman?
Islam isn't supposed to make things difficult.
There is hijab for man too - he must wear his trousers over his ankle and under the knee, and his beard is his sunnah, and he must observe clothing which does not reveal nor becomes overly flashy. He must cover between the naval and the knees. This is the mans protection.
What you need to ask is, who actually follows this? And you'll find that Muslim men follow it, unless we start to wear labels and graphics and loud colours, in which case they totally missed the point.
No, it isn't a woman's job to help men not look at them. That is the responsibility of the man alone.
A woman's dress code is to protect herself and honor herself. It does help the society as whole, but that's if MEN also follow their dress code and adhere to their rules and regulations.
I remember when I was not muslim and men would whistle or make it known they were looking at me (I was only a young girl!). It was THE WORST feeling ever. I felt very violated and humiliated that they were glancing at me without my consent. That's why when I discovered the abaya, there was no looking back! Alhamdullilah.
Dirty men are going to be dirty, whether a woman is covered or not!
Sub'han'Allah sister, your comment reminded me of these ayaat.
"And recite to them, [O Muhammad], the news of him to whom we gave [knowledge of] Our signs, but he detached himself from them; so Satan pursued him, and he became of the deviators." Qur'an 7:175
"And if We had willed, we could have elevated him thereby, but he adhered [instead] to the earth and followed his own desire. So his example is like that of the dog: if you chase him, he pants, or if you leave him, he [still] pants. That is the example of the people who denied Our signs. So relate the stories that perhaps they will give thought." 7:176
As you said "Dirty men are going to be dirty, whether a woman is covered or not!"
No, it isn't a woman's job to help men not look at them. That is the responsibility of the man alone.
Shaykh Hamza Yusuf:
When a woman follows a manner in hijab, in clothing and etiquette, she actually protects men. It is because of men's weakness that the hijab was given. In reality, women are stronger in Shahwa (passion, urges), but the modesty component in them is greater which prevents them from doing the same things as men without restraint.
The points you mentioned about men have already been addressed. Men should also dress modestly. A HUMAN with dignity and honor clothes himself/herself properly.
I think the main reason you find it "unfair" is because of the western ideas of equality.We should be able to do the same things men do right? Actually, that's not quite true. We are different creatures with different needs. If we all had the same rules and regulations, it would be very unfair.
Equality and Equity are not the same thing. Maybe if you internalize this and learn to appreciate and love the creation that you are, it won't feel so negative for you, insha'Allah.
Dr Zakir Naik use to refute rebuke this Idiotic western idea of EQUALITY between men & women by this verse of the noble quran
The Noble Quran says something like the men have rights on women the women also have rights on Men. So he asks further, does this mean if a burglar breaks into your home, will you say to your wife, I believe in our equal rights so you please go and fight and wrestle with the burglar ?? lol
similarly will a mother say as we have equal rights let the father take care of the new born when I am going to work ??
So Allah designed us in different way & charecterstics about self control etc (leaving out exceptions) so Allah's laws are different too for men & women.
Dr Zakir Naik use to refute rebuke this Idiotic western idea of EQUALITY between men & women by this verse of the noble quran
The Noble Quran says something like the men have rights on women the women also have rights on Men. So he asks further, does this mean if a burglar breaks into your home, will you say to your wife, I believe in our equal rights so you please go and fight and wrestle with the burglar ?? lol
similarly will a mother say as we have equal rights let the father take care of the new born when I am going to work ??
So Allah designed us in different way & charecterstics about self control etc (leaving out exceptions) so Allah's laws are different too for men & women.
I've heard that women are allowed to work though, is that true?
We as Muslims often are being caught up in things from cars to even fashion in this sense. However what we first must do is analyze the subject from bottom up.
What is the definition of fashion? This is one of the meanings, which i guess everybody can agree with me on it.
"style in clothes, cosmetics, behaviour, etc, esp the latest or most admired style"
Admired by who? Society? Society now a days is SOOO POOR here in the west they cannot afford clothes that are not torn. I mean look at those jeans..all torn with big holes in it. So sad they have to walk in those clothes. I want to walk with them to a store even to buy them so clothes that are not torn...(Yes i know it is a joke, but i did it on intention so you get my point).
People BUY torn clothes now a days. I mean the MOST arrogant and rich person in history of mankind..would you see him wearing torn clothes? Would you be able to convince him that there would come a time people would BUY clothes that are torn.
So it is rather contradictory to go with this "fashion". I have a fake leather jacket more like a summer jacket, it is i believe already 8-9 years old. The outer side of it is like dry mud coming of..that you can easily pull it off. But i wear it why? My argument is, if this is not fashion of today, than for SURE those those torn jeans with big holes in it, do also not belong to "fashion" (why i wear it, because it still does what it needs to do. I am not bothered about it).
We ask almost never why we do what we do. Just follow like the sheep.
Look at this poor guy, he used to BBQ food for a living..now he got all holes in his t-shirt (yes it is a joke)
Or this guy he has laid so many bricks working on his knees, his pants is all torn up at the knees (yes it is also joke..but you get what i am trying to say)
So for us Muslims, i think it is kind of easy now a days with a lot of things to not do. Just matter of perspective. I mean if my grandparents with little money they had would not even buy torn clothes to go with this fashion why should i act like a fool and buy clothes that now a days are branded as fashionable. I don't fit either way, if i even wear those clothes, my mentality goes against their mentality. So am i a stranger in the society? I hope so.
Last edited by Simple_Person; 03-21-2017 at 08:07 AM.
I've heard that women are allowed to work though, is that true?
Sister
Its deduced from the Incident of Shuaib AS (Musa' As's Father in Law ) 's daughters took their sheep for watering while their father was very old (nearly blind i think) and Musa AS met them on seeing their sad plight of being long waiting in a remote corner and asked them and so took their sheep to water as other men who were also feeding their cattle were obstructing them. so that those great Muslimas usually used to wait till those men had catered their cattle, water to its fill is seen from their words in the Noble Quran , which also proves THEY AVOIDED FREE MIXING.
It show's in DIRE NEED can work but should avoid free mixing. Certain rulings if its not found in us we are allowed to follow from our earlier Prophets which becomes APPARENT ONLY FROM THE NOBLE QURAN (not the distorted OT & NT )is what i heard .
About the joke of torn clothes, it reminded to my mind the time when I traveled to Jordan at the first time. It was about 30 years ago and at that time torn clothes were fashionable. My friend used jeans which were torn when she left to the market. She returned very fast and changed. I asked why you did so and she told she couldn´t stand the looks of other people as they were full of pity and compassion when they looked hers jeans. "Oh what a poor poor girl, she can´t afford proper clothes", they felt of hers mind. And those jeans had been quite expensive when she bought them.
One´s fashion and sign of welfare might be other´s poverty.
About the joke of torn clothes, it reminded to my mind the time when I traveled to Jordan at the first time. It was about 30 years ago and at that time torn clothes were fashionable. My friend used jeans which were torn when she left to the market. She returned very fast and changed. I asked why you did so and she told she couldn´t stand the looks of other people as they were full of pity and compassion when they looked hers jeans. "Oh what a poor poor girl, she can´t afford proper clothes", they felt of hers mind. And those jeans had been quite expensive when she bought them.
One´s fashion and sign of welfare might be other´s poverty.
HAHAHHAHAH sister, this gave me very a good laugh. jazakallahu khairan
When a woman follows a manner in hijab, in clothing and etiquette, she actually protects men. It is because of men's weakness that the hijab was given. In reality, women are stronger in Shahwa (passion, urges), but the modesty component in them is greater which prevents them from doing the same things as men without restraint.
Don't quote Hamza Yusuf without reading my post in full , lol. Your quote actually doesn't say it's a woman's responsibility, it says it is a form of protection for men, just as lowering your gaze is a protection for women because you do it whether she is covered or not. If you read my post, I clearly stated that when a woman covers it does help society as a whole, implying that it it protects both men and women from corruption. It is a shield, in other words. Also, the article you posted was put together by somebody else quoting the sheikh, I encourage you to find the full lecture and you'll see how he isn't one sided.
Furthermore, If you listen to ALL of Hamza Yusuf's work, he addresses men many times over and society as a unit. He is very big on that. The responsibility DOES NOT fall on the women to stop men from looking at them. Don't cherry pick and run with it please It is that kind of backward thinking that pushes women away from Islam and it goes hand in hand with the cultural bias that women somehow are responsible for men's sins. Ridiculous!
Men and Women have a different set of rules which work together and shape society. Allah gave clear instruction to LOWER YOUR GAZE as a man. He also gave clear instructions for women to cover up. At no point was it implied that if women didn't cover, men are free to look. I hope this is clear.
I quoted a hadith, did you read it? If the prophet (saw) turned a man's head so he wouldn't look at this woman as well as answered her questions without looking at her, it CLEARLY shows that men are responsible for their actions. There's a fine line here that keeps getting crossed. I will reiterate once more, women are not responsible for a man's actions and it isn't her responsibility to prevent him from gazing at women. Men will stare at a fully covered woman or a fully naked woman if they are corrupted and do not fear Allah. End of.
Though a Sister does not agree to this ( i clicked ''like' for her other part of the post of dirty looks ) Bro, You are correct on this issue since we see these in our books as guidelines for women.
1) Not to talk ghair maghram men softly ( fascinating them)
2) To avoid walking creating sounds with their jewels (it mean like that worn on foot that Arabs and from sub continent use it )
3) To avoid using perfumes that flows through into the men ( If she does it inside home or women congregation its not barred )
So Islam is very precise, subhanallah from THE ALL WISE, Allah .
Clapping sound does not happen untill both palms co operate is a Thai proverb here so its true BOTH must co operate to avoiding evil and both must co operate to adjoin virtues. Men must not talk indirectly to a woman tempting her imo & vice versa too and many more since we all understand as we are grown up.
So Why these law's are for sister ? and even travelling for more than a day (or three days) alone for a women. Though every one is held for his or her's actions but there is factor called tempting factor which Allah wants to solve at its roots. Yes Man has to protect his eye sight as well as women but Allah ordered Hijab of women and hijab of men is beard is what I heard, do not know its a hadith or not.
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Sister
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It is that kind of backward thinking that pushes women away from Islam and it goes hand in hand with the cultural bias that women somehow are responsible for men's sins. Ridiculous!
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