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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message each

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    My attain talks her dad's side adopted cousins & hang out & direct message them .... I told I didn't like it & it's not permissible but I got told I can't cuts ties on kinship ? Please answer my questions

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    Abz Iz Back!!! Abz2000's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Are they forbidden to marry?
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    Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message each

    Long ago has hope perished, as have our men of honor
    M.A



    The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress

    Frederick Douglas

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    Full Member AbdullahAziz's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    yes since cousins can marry, also adopted cousins are even more far away, theyre not allowed to communicate [other than about Islam] or free-mix

    keeping good kinship with association is amongst mahram members and not non-mahram; you just keep good general relations with non-mahram family members when association is unavoidable, but you keep it proper Islamic, no 'fun chat' etc,
    Last edited by AbdullahAziz; 1 Week Ago at 02:32 PM.
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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    So no hanging out alone or privately messaging 1 other .... no 1 on 1 outside the family gathering ??? I need the dawud to help out my situation?

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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by Abz2000 View Post
    Are they forbidden to marry?
    No they can get married ...
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    Glory be to Allah!!! Hamza Asadullah's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by ab_maalik_9 View Post
    My attain talks her dad's side adopted cousins & hang out & direct message them .... I told I didn't like it & it's not permissible but I got told I can't cuts ties on kinship ? Please answer my questions

    Sent from my SM-J327P using IslamicBoard mobile app


    The following is a fatwa on Cousin interaction:

    Whichever male can marry a female according to the rules of Shariah have to observe the laws of hijaab from each other. It is not permissible for such males and females to freely intermingle with each other as there is a potential of them committing evil and immoral acts. It is permissible for cousins to marry each other.Therefore, male and female cousins must adhere to the laws of hijaab.

    Source:http://islamqa.org/hanafi/askimam/56...asting-as-well

    Therefore my brother it is not permissible to mix, intermingle or interact with cousins of the opposite gender beyond what is necessary and strict hijaab must be maintained between both sexes.

    And Allah knows best in all matters

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    Abz Iz Back!!! Abz2000's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    First it's my respected ukhti,
    Then it's ukhti that I really like spending time chatting with,
    Then it's ukhti who I'm beginning to develop strong feelings for,
    Then it's getting to be real heart-warming every time I talk to her,
    Then it's ukhti I "love you for the sake of Allah",
    Then we're both really losing composure and respectability,
    Then it's lucky if we're seperated by a few oceans......

    There comes a time when both realise they have feelings for each other, that's when they have to put the brakes on and start respectable fiance mode, if they feel they can't live without each other, tell mum and dad to be lenient in compatibility comparison.

    Also explain the genetic benefits of marrying a little far due to a good inheritence of diversity and survival qualities (won't apply in this case since they're foster).

    Trying to pull them apart from each other won't usually help if they've developed deep feelings for each other since the sis would be depressed and hate you, and both you cousins will probably develop a sense of hatred, anger, or dislike.

    So see where it's at, and try and bring it back into Allah's limits asap. Don't let your ego get in the way - it may end up injured worse later if you're oppressive.



    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fakhitah_bint_Abi_Talib


    http://saudigazette.com.sa/article/1...Islam-Umm-Hani

    You can get informed by reading up, though Allah knows best the reason why the messenger of Allah later refused to marry her, in other places, it is reported that he said that he felt no desire/need to marry her when she came back and offered herself in marriage. And he was human.
    Last edited by Abz2000; 1 Week Ago at 06:52 AM.
    Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message each

    Long ago has hope perished, as have our men of honor
    M.A



    The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress

    Frederick Douglas

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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by Abz2000 View Post
    First it's my respected ukhti,
    Then it's ukhti that I really like spending time chatting with,
    Then it's ukhti who I'm beginning to develop strong feelings for,
    Then it's getting to be real heart-warming every time I talk to her,
    Then it's ukhti I "love you for the sake of Allah",
    Then we're both really losing composure and respectability,
    Then it's lucky if we're seperated by a few oceans......

    There comes a time when both realise they have feelings for each other, that's when they have to put the brakes on and start respectable fiance mode, if they feel they can't live without each other, tell mum and dad to be lenient in compatibility comparison.

    Also explain the genetic benefits of marrying a little far due to a good inheritence of diversity and survival qualities (won't apply in this case since they're foster).

    Trying to pull them apart from each other won't usually help if they've developed deep feelings for each other since the sis would be depressed and hate you, and both you cousins will probably develop a sense of hatred, anger, or dislike.

    So see where it's at, and try and bring it back into Allah's limits asap. Don't let your ego get in the way - it may end up injured worse later if you're oppressive.



    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fakhitah_bint_Abi_Talib

    You can get informed by reading up, though Allah knows best the reason why the messenger of Allah later refused to marry her, in other places, it is reported that he said that he felt no desire/need to marry her when she came back and offered herself in marriage. And he was human.
    Shukran

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    Abz Iz Back!!! Abz2000's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by ab_maalik_9 View Post
    Shukran
    I come across a little assertive and instructive there instead of advising - I'd just woken up....hope you understand brother.
    1 | Likes ab_maalik_9 liked this post
    Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message each

    Long ago has hope perished, as have our men of honor
    M.A



    The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress

    Frederick Douglas

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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by Abz2000 View Post
    I come across a little assertive and instructive there instead of advising - I'd just woken up....hope you understand brother.
    I want 2 understand but my feeling for the sister is the way but I feel like she betray me by doing this ... we suppose to get married in sept1

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    Abz Iz Back!!! Abz2000's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by ab_maalik_9 View Post
    I want 2 understand but my feeling for the sister is the way but I feel like she betray me by doing this ... we suppose to get married in sept1
    I didn't know, I thought attain was a predictive type error for sister,
    You need to think carefully since it's often stress and arguments later - especially if you have children - sometimes no partner wants to let go of the children and you feel stuck together in a mess.
    1 | Likes ab_maalik_9 liked this post
    Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message each

    Long ago has hope perished, as have our men of honor
    M.A



    The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress

    Frederick Douglas

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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Nah nothing like that yet Ahki

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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by Abz2000 View Post
    I didn't know, I thought attain was a predictive type error for sister,
    You need to think carefully since it's often stress and arguments later - especially if you have children - sometimes no partner wants to let go of the children and you feel stuck together in a mess.
    We r planing on getting married Sept 1 Ahki

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    Glory be to Allah!!! Hamza Asadullah's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by ab_maalik_9 View Post
    We r planing on getting married Sept 1 Ahki


    As brother Abz has stated you really need to think very carefully about this because marriage is a big thing and we should not be complacent about who we marry regardless of whether they are related to us or not. Many think that if they marry within the family then everything will be ok because the girl is from the same family but this is certainly not the case and any issues with marriages within the family can actually split families apart. I have seen this with my own eyes with close friends of mine.

    So if the sister is freely interacting with strange men be it cousins or not and considers it "acceptable" then surely this is not a good sign. Although your marriage is already set up you really need to carefully consider whether you should marry her or not. This is because we should find spouses whose Deen and character pleases us. She should be shy and bashful in front of strange men not confidently interacting with non Mahrams.

    So give this further thought and talk to your parents and family about it. Make isthikhara and ask of Allah to help and guide you with this.

    I pray whatever is best will happen for you with regards to finding the right spouse for marriage. Ameen
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    Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message each


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    Limited Member ab_maalik_9's Avatar
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    Re: Is it permissible for female cousins & male cousins to hang out & direct message


    Quote Originally Posted by Hamza Asadullah View Post


    As brother Abz has stated you really need to think very carefully about this because marriage is a big thing and we should not be complacent about who we marry regardless of whether they are related to us or not. Many think that if they marry within the family then everything will be ok because the girl is from the same family but this is certainly not the case and any issues with marriages within the family can actually split families apart. I have seen this with my own eyes with close friends of mine.

    So if the sister is freely interacting with strange men be it cousins or not and considers it "acceptable" then surely this is not a good sign. Although your marriage is already set up you really need to carefully consider whether you should marry her or not. This is because we should find spouses whose Deen and character pleases us. She should be shy and bashful in front of strange men not confidently interacting with non Mahrams.

    So give this further thought and talk to your parents and family about it. Make isthikhara and ask of Allah to help and guide you with this.

    I pray whatever is best will happen for you with regards to finding the right spouse for marriage. Ameen
    She was freely chillin with her cousin not me .... I just dawud proof so I can tell her bout it & insha'allah it won't happen again

 

 
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