Is it backbiting when you are talking to yourself?

format_quote Originally Posted by Aaqib

Is it backbiting if I talk about another person to myself/write it to myself in a notebook for example?

Asalaamualaykum:

It wont be considered as backbiting should you write the event in a book and retain the book. In backbiting there has to be an audience or another party as such.

However - it won't be wise to do such a thing as you cannot guarantee the total secrecy and privacy of the book. If someone else reads it then you become accountable for the lack of safe guarding the property.

I think the brother is just over-thinking. Thinking bad about people is not something that is unjustifiable.

For example if someone is drinking intoxicants and doing drugs, he becomes someone who does drugs, and just because the thought of that person that is doing drugs pops in your head, does not mean it is backbiting or that you are having bad thoughts about this person that you should not have... Rather it is justified due to the fact that he is a druggie.

The other extreme is to look at normal people, and you're just trying to find faults in them without a reason or justification. Especially for your fellow muslims, even if you have a reason to think bad about him, you should try to find an excuse for him as much as possible, until it becomes apparent and unavoidable and that this bad action or thing has become publicized

Hope this cleared things up! jazakallahu khairan

Jazakallah khaiyrun for all the responses. I recently decided to completely prevent myself from backbiting as it seems to be a heavily grave sin. So over thinking? Possibly, I just want to keep myself safe.

Walaikum salam to everyone!

format_quote Originally Posted by ahmed.younes

Probably is if someone reads it off your notebook. Besides you shouldn't be thinking bad about people without justification...

I think you're just overthinking brother

I mean I won't dislike someone without that person making me dislike them. But yeah I see your point.

format_quote Originally Posted by umie

to a certain degree of course. if you did try your best to keep the secret safe...and someone is actively and deliberately has been looking for it...then you cannot be fully blamed of course...what are you supposed to do? keep it in a safe?

But yes, wise is not to write it down and try not to think about it...but if writing it down really calms you down, and you can write the pressure off...and you can keep it in a place where you can be pretty sure no one finds and reads it...then it shouldn't be much of a problem.

Asalaamualaykum:

There is a reason that in my last sentence I phrased it as "becoming accountable" and omitted the actual accountable deed.

In other words - When one takes the decision to write an event in a book, and yet is aware that the divulging of that information would be detrimental - then one has to understand that the Safe guarding of that very book becomes an Amaanath (Trust) upon himself BY himself. He has self appointed that responsibility of safeguarding the written event because he has chose to write that event.

Hence - If someone where to read that book even without his permission, then effectively he has self implicated himself into the failure of Safe guarding that sensitive information, which is in turn breaking a trust. That means he would have to bare some responsibility of the entire issue - since it all started by he Choosing to even write that event down.