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  1. #1
    Aisha_101's Avatar
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    A question regarding homosexuality.

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    What is the main reason for homosexuality being a sin? Is it because people can't make babies? It is quite ironic how much hate an innocent individual can get just because of their sexual orientation at the snap of your fingers. And please, don't ever compare them to murderers and rapists and all those psychos. That's ridiculous. Just cause someone's not straight doesn't mean they become the villain all of a sudden. It's just like comparing apples and oranges; they're two different things.

    With regards to making babies, with the help of science now there are so many ways of having a baby. And most kids adopted by gay parents are happy. They get the love they want even though it's from just one set of genders as their parents.
    If god gave us a brain, we may as well use it and overcome such issues, meaning, we can sort the issue by thinking of other alternative ways, such as adoption or having a surrogate mother, etc.

    And on the other hand, if a person was to be gay, the chances of them not marrying the opposite gender is high. Which means that they won't have a baby anyway. So either way, married or not married, a gay won't have a baby unless they choose to adopt which of course, heterosexual single parents and couples do as well. So what's the point of hating them?

    Also, I'm a straight female and I hang out with both straight and gay friends (male/female). Some are muslims (and some are Christians/catholics/atheists) who're gay and some straight and non of us have any issues with one another. We're a strong bonded set of friends with mutual respect towards one another with open minds. Yes they pray to Allah (SWT). I've no issue with them at all and they're all nice, and respectable individuals.

    Please answer this question with respect. I would very much appreciate if you try not bash the topic in a rude manner as it's only a question to be discussed, not debated.


    Thank you for your time to read and answer.


    Salam,
    Aisha.

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    What is the main reason for homosexuality being a sin?
    Because Allah says it's a sin, therefore it's a sin. Sodomy is a sin.

    Being attracted to the same sex is not a sin, because "attraction" or "feelings" are not in of themselves sinful. Forbidden actions however are sinful. So if someone is acting upon his desires, he is committing a sin.
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    A question regarding homosexuality.

    D e a t h

    is the easiest
    of all things after it
    ; ;

    the hardest
    of all things before it

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    Aisha_101's Avatar
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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    Because Allah says it's a sin, therefore it's a sin. Sodomy is a sin.

    Being attracted to the same sex is not a sin, because "attraction" or "feelings" are not in of themselves sinful. Forbidden actions however are sinful. So if someone is acting upon his desires, he is committing a sin.
    In that case, sodomy won't apply to same sex female couples. They can't do it.

    If same sex male couples refrain from sodomy, but continues to live together, would that still be a problem? Since Islam is fully focused on just one area of homosexuality.

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    In that case, sodomy won't apply to same sex female couples. They can't do it.
    Sodomy, no. Premarital sexual relations, yes. Females looking at other female's private parts, touching them, etc is haram.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    If same sex male couples refrain from sodomy, but continues to live together, would that still be a problem? Since Islam is fully focused on just one area of homosexuality.
    If they are living together because they are a "couple" then it's haram. If a person is gay, they shouldn't be gravitating towards the thing they desire.

    Really it's the same as the heterosexual counterparts. Premarital sex, extramarital sex, lustful gazing, touching etc. is all haram, so it's no different than gays doing the same thing.
    A question regarding homosexuality.

    D e a t h

    is the easiest
    of all things after it
    ; ;

    the hardest
    of all things before it

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    Really it's the same as the heterosexual counterparts. Premarital sex, extramarital sex, lustful gazing, touching etc. is all haram, so it's no different than gays doing the same thing.
    Except the only difference is, its halal for heterosexuals to be in a romantic relationship after marriage but haram for homosexuals.

    The thing is, homosexuality isn't a choice. They've always been attracted to the same sex at a young age even when they didn't know that such attractions existed, what they are and whether it's allowed or not. They just were. Most homosexuals I met says that they've never ever been attracted to the opposite sex. Not alone even thinking of them in such a manner but be very cautious and shy around the same sex. And this was at a young age before they knew of this term 'homosexuality'.

    So basically they're born that way. And they can't get married and must be single till they die cause the religion says so. How is that even fair? There's no justice in this aspect.

    Think of it this way; you're straight, and you're completely 100% attracted to your opposite sex. And looking at the same sex in a romantic manner, like being in a relationship/married doesn't work in your head at all. It's something you wouldn't ever want cause you're not gay.

    Now, put this perspective in the shoes of a gay female/male. They could never imagine being with the opposite at all.

    Get my point? This is basically how I understood their point of view. And it made sense.

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    The thing is, homosexuality isn't a choice.
    Acting upon the desire is a choice, and more than that, homosexuality is sometimes also a choice. I can't say that for everyone, but I've known straight people who commit homosexual acts because they are simply bored and want to experiment. Then they become confused.

    In islam, it's known that there can be attraction to the same sex. For example, women dancing suggestively in front of other women can elicit certain desires. At the end of the day, these things are haram.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    So basically they're born that way. And they can't get married and must be single till they die cause the religion says so. How is that even fair? There's no justice in this aspect.
    Everyone has their own test in this life. Some with illness, some with appearance, some with poverty, etc. EVERYONE. A poor person can say "life isn't fair" because they can't do the things that rich people can. But that doesn't mean he should go rob a bank, or commit haram acts. If a person is a Muslim, they will accept Allah's decree. We don't live for our desires, we live to serve Allah. A person doesn't have to feel miserable just because they are single. There are single straight people too who cannot get married. I don't really see any unfairness when we're all tested. At the end of the day, it's each individual's choice what they want to do or not. We have free choice. But as a Muslim, we should be choosing that which brings us closer to Allah swt and understand that there's nothing we can't overcome no matter how difficult it is.
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    A question regarding homosexuality.

    D e a t h

    is the easiest
    of all things after it
    ; ;

    the hardest
    of all things before it

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    I can acknowledge that homosexuality is a really difficult thing to go through, but a homosexual who can overcome his desires during times of difficulty can be a better muslim/servant to Allah than a heterosexual with normal desires. His patience and perseverance with such a calamity could be his ticket to jannah. So I have a lot of respect for people who aren't trying to look for loopholes in their deen. It's clear that homosexuality is forbidden in Islam. One's love for his deen has to supersede his lowest desires.
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    A question regarding homosexuality.

    D e a t h

    is the easiest
    of all things after it
    ; ;

    the hardest
    of all things before it

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    I can acknowledge that homosexuality is a really difficult thing to go through, but a homosexual who can overcome his desires during times of difficulty can be a better muslim/servant to Allah than a heterosexual with normal desires. His patience and perseverance with such a calamity could be his ticket to jannah. So I have a lot of respect for people who aren't trying to look for loopholes in their deen. It's clear that homosexuality is forbidden in Islam. One's love for his deen has to supersede his lowest desires.
    This was a beautiful answer (: thank you so much sister!

    I would like to know if it's okay to hang out with homosexual friends. They clearly stated to not conquer feelings towards me or anyone who isn't gay. They're a great bunch of people and most are in relationships anyway. I'm sure this won't be a sin, there's literally no swapping of romantic glances among us at all in all honesty. And I would never have any thoughts of being homosexual since I'm 350% straight.
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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    This was a beautiful answer (: thank you so much sister!

    I would like to know if it's okay to hang out with homosexual friends. They clearly stated to not conquer feelings towards me or anyone who isn't gay. They're a great bunch of people and most are in relationships anyway. I'm sure this won't be a sin, there's literally no swapping of romantic glances among us at all in all honesty. And I would never have any thoughts of being homosexual since I'm 350% straight.
    Well, we have to mind the faith of our friends in general. We should associate ourselves with those who we can benefit from and who will help us in our faith. For example, if you were going to be late in your salaah, to have a friend who will remind you of the correct timing and pray with you. If you have muslim friends who identify as gay, maybe you can be their reminder to the deen and try to help them be patient and persevere. Unfortunately in the muslim community they are sometimes shunned or they know they will receive backlash. We should instead help them stay on the right path and encourage them to do what's right for the sake of their akhira. Being gay is not something to be boastful about though. I don't think we should ever get caught up in feeling "proud" of something that can make us commit haram acts. So what I'm saying is be mindful of who you befriend. Anyone we befriend can be an influence on us even if we don't think they are. Those who are openly sinful are not people we should hang around. That doesn't mean we can't treat them with kindness or whatever, but rather that we shouldn't take them as close companions. Even if you may not agree with their lifestyle, you could unknowingly be advocating it simply by association.
    A question regarding homosexuality.

    D e a t h

    is the easiest
    of all things after it
    ; ;

    the hardest
    of all things before it

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    I remember when I had these desires in myself.. I didn't act upon it though, I simply prayed to Allah to get rid of these feelings. Alhamdullilah.
    A question regarding homosexuality.

    He is Allah, other than whom there is no deity, the Sovereign, the Pure, the Perfection, the Bestower of Faith, the Overseer, the Exalted in Might, the Compeller, the Superior. Exalted is Allah above whatever they associate with Him [59:23]




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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Growing up, all the male friends I had were gay. There CAN be attraction between a gay man and a straight woman This is because homosexuality is a product of a person's upbringing and modern society. It is a corruption that happens whether the person does it willingly or not.The absolute natural inclination will always be there whether you see it or not and whether they themselves see it or not. Gay men tell women they are hot and sexy more than straight men do. It is gay men who run the fashion industry.... you better believe it!

    I guarantee you, if you question them (homosexuals in general) about their childhood and get the most finest details about their upbringing, you'll begin to connect dots. It takes time and stepping outside the box to fully see this. You have to let go of your personal bias and emotions about the situation to see the bigger picture.

    Homosexuals themselves are not bad and I don't personally hate them and it makes me very sad at the lack of understanding from the muslim community. This whole notion that homosexuality is a choice is bogus, but so is the notion that it isn't a choice and it happens from birth.

    My best memories as a teen (I wasn't raised a muslim btw) are with my gay friends. Now in my 30's, they are far gone from my life and I'm actually glad. You don't have to stay friends with them. As much as you love them, they will influence you one way or another. This goes for any friend, you've got to choose them wisely. You are who your friends are, always.

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Bismillah,

    As mentioned from other members above, homosexuality is forbidden in Islam. Homosexual thoughts or desires are not forbidden, because you are not punished or judged based on your thoughts, but rather on your actions. These thoughts are usually from the waswas of Shaytaan, the accursed, and when people give in to these thoughts, they begin to be led astray, for example by beginning to masturbate (which is forbidden), or have pre-marital sex with someone from the same gender, etc.

    However, if someone you know is gay or lesbian, that's no justification to behave with hostility towards them. Their sexuality is their issue and you have no right to judge them, because we are all being judged by Al-Hakam (the arbitrator).

    On the issue of being gay + Muslim, this is a heated and controversial topic, because it's something that has been developing over the past years. Islam is a religion that forbids homosexuality. So, to be gay and Muslim is incompatible. It's like going to France and going against the laws of France, while expecting the French community to accept you. The Muslim community will never accept gay Muslims because it's clearly prohibited. They argue that being gay is not a choice, but being Muslim is a choice, so at the end of the day, they need to choose between being a gay or being a gay Muslim.

    I would like to stress, though, that any sort of discrimination or hatred towards homosexuals is immoral and forbidden.

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    I dont get "homosexuals are born like that" argument

    - straight people are born to be heterosexual - including being attracted to married people and people they can not marry ( non monotheists). Its a bad argument. Even in Islam straight people cannot marry every other straight person there are restrictions.

    Pedophiles and people who want to do incest can make the same argument. It does not mean that Islam accepts it.

    Desire for the married person or the non monotheists is not wrong - acting upon it - that is wrong. The same applies to Incest, pedos and homosexuals.

    Marriage is between believing men and women (polygamy in certain circumstances).
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    A question regarding homosexuality.

    Do you think the pious don't sin?

    They merely:
    Veiled themselves and didn't flaunt it
    Sought forgiveness and didn't persist
    Took ownership of it and don't justify it
    And acted with excellence after they had erred - Ibn al-Qayyim

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    then please answer these questions:
    What do you think about pedophiles?
    is being a pedophile a choice, are they born that way or is it a sickness?
    Are pedophiles all bad? what if a pedophile has these pedo-desires, but he resists it and doesn't act upon it...is he then still a bad person?
    Should a pedophile marry someone 40 years younger than himself? or should he stick to his own age?

    I ask this because...if being a pedophile is a choice...then homosexuality is also a choice. if it is a sickness, then homosexuality is also a sickness...if they are born that way, then that means pedophiles can do nothing about their situation and they are not bad people.
    if pedophiles shouldn't act upon their desires, then homosexuals also shouldn't act upon their desires.

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by umie View Post
    I ask this because...if being a pedophile is a choice...then homosexuality is also a choice. if it is a sickness, then homosexuality is also a sickness...if they are born that way, then that means pedophiles can do nothing about their situation and they are not bad people.
    if pedophiles shouldn't act upon their desires, then homosexuals also shouldn't act upon their desires.
    Why do you compare homosexuals to pedophiles, in your argument? Wouldn't this be considered offensive, as not all homosexuals are pedophiles (just like not all Muslims are terrorists), just because a small percentage are, you seem to be equating all homosexuals to pedophiles?

    If a pedophile or anyone else has bad thoughts, but they do not act upon it, then they're not sinning for it. In fact, they get reward for that, as narrated in Sahih Muslim:

    It is narrated on the authority of Ibn Abbas that the Messenger of Allah (Peace be upon him) transmitted it from the Blessed and Great Lord: Verily Allah recorded the good and the evil and then made it clear that he who intended good but did not do it, Allah recorded one complete good in his favour, but if he intended it and also did it, the Glorious and Great Allah recorded ten to seven hundred virtues and even more to his credit. But it he intended evil, but did not commit it, Allah wrote down full one good in his favour. If he intended that and also committed it, Allah made an entry of one evil against him.

    Source

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by 99sobi View Post
    Why do you compare homosexuals to pedophiles, in your argument? Wouldn't this be considered offensive, as not all homosexuals are pedophiles (just like not all Muslims are terrorists), just because a small percentage are, you seem to be equating all homosexuals to pedophiles?

    If a pedophile or anyone else has bad thoughts, but they do not act upon it, then they're not sinning for it. In fact, they get reward for that, as narrated in Sahih Muslim:

    It is narrated on the authority of Ibn Abbas that the Messenger of Allah (Peace be upon him) transmitted it from the Blessed and Great Lord: Verily Allah recorded the good and the evil and then made it clear that he who intended good but did not do it, Allah recorded one complete good in his favour, but if he intended it and also did it, the Glorious and Great Allah recorded ten to seven hundred virtues and even more to his credit. But it he intended evil, but did not commit it, Allah wrote down full one good in his favour. If he intended that and also committed it, Allah made an entry of one evil against him.

    Source
    I am not comparing anything. you are the one connecting homosexuals with pedophiles by reading my post wrong. Nowhere in my post am I saying that homosexuals are all pedophiles.
    what I wanted to point out with my post is this:
    homosexuals, hetero's and bi's are usually considered as sexual preferences....but then pedophily is also a sexual preference.
    pedophily is usually considered as a sickness...but then homosexuality or bisexuality is also a sickness.
    you cannot say the one is a preference and the other one is a sickness.
    the pedophile is expected to not to act upon their desire but the homosexual is OK.
    I am not defending the pedophiles, nor am I attacking the homosexuals...I am just pointing out that we have double standards somewhere.
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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Do you know what happened to the people of Lut عليه السلام?
    A question regarding homosexuality.

    "The plants grow in Jannah by uttering: SubhaanAllaah walHamdulillaah wa laa ilaaha illaAllaah waAllaahu Akbar"
    [At-Tirmidhi]

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by umie View Post
    I am not comparing anything. you are the one connecting homosexuals with pedophiles by reading my post wrong. Nowhere in my post am I saying that homosexuals are all pedophiles.
    what I wanted to point out with my post is this:
    homosexuals, hetero's and bi's are usually considered as sexual preferences....but then pedophily is also a sexual preference.
    pedophily is usually considered as a sickness...but then homosexuality or bisexuality is also a sickness.
    you cannot say the one is a preference and the other one is a sickness.
    the pedophile is expected to not to act upon their desire but the homosexual is OK.
    I am not defending the pedophiles, nor am I attacking the homosexuals...I am just pointing out that we have double standards somewhere.
    I see! I was a bit confused, which is why I made the reply. Jazakallah for the clarification

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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by umie View Post
    then please answer these questions:
    What do you think about pedophiles?
    is being a pedophile a choice, are they born that way or is it a sickness?
    Are pedophiles all bad? what if a pedophile has these pedo-desires, but he resists it and doesn't act upon it...is he then still a bad person?
    Should a pedophile marry someone 40 years younger than himself? or should he stick to his own age?

    I ask this because...if being a pedophile is a choice...then homosexuality is also a choice. if it is a sickness, then homosexuality is also a sickness...if they are born that way, then that means pedophiles can do nothing about their situation and they are not bad people.
    if pedophiles shouldn't act upon their desires, then homosexuals also shouldn't act upon their desires.
    Ich bin mit deinem Beitrag einverstanden. Die meisten Leute im Amerika hassen die Padophilen, aber Homosexuelle nicht.
    A question regarding homosexuality.

    He is Allah, other than whom there is no deity, the Sovereign, the Pure, the Perfection, the Bestower of Faith, the Overseer, the Exalted in Might, the Compeller, the Superior. Exalted is Allah above whatever they associate with Him [59:23]




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    Re: A question regarding homosexuality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aisha_101 View Post
    What is the main reason for homosexuality being a sin? Is it because people can't make babies? It is quite ironic how much hate an innocent individual can get just because of their sexual orientation at the snap of your fingers. And please, don't ever compare them to murderers and rapists and all those psychos. That's ridiculous. Just cause someone's not straight doesn't mean they become the villain all of a sudden. It's just like comparing apples and oranges; they're two different things. With regards to making babies, with the help of science now there are so many ways of having a baby. And most kids adopted by gay parents are happy. They get the love they want even though it's from just one set of genders as their parents.If god gave us a brain, we may as well use it and overcome such issues, meaning, we can sort the issue by thinking of other alternative ways, such as adoption or having a surrogate mother, etc. And on the other hand, if a person was to be gay, the chances of them not marrying the opposite gender is high. Which means that they won't have a baby anyway. So either way, married or not married, a gay won't have a baby unless they choose to adopt which of course, heterosexual single parents and couples do as well. So what's the point of hating them? Also, I'm a straight female and I hang out with both straight and gay friends (male/female). Some are muslims (and some are Christians/catholics/atheists) who're gay and some straight and non of us have any issues with one another. We're a strong bonded set of friends with mutual respect towards one another with open minds. Yes they pray to Allah (SWT). I've no issue with them at all and they're all nice, and respectable individuals.Please answer this question with respect. I would very much appreciate if you try not bash the topic in a rude manner as it's only a question to be discussed, not debated.Thank you for your time to read and answer.Salam,Aisha.
    If you think that this same sex relationship is haram then you ask them to leave this haram act.
    A question regarding homosexuality.

    Allah (swt) knows best

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