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Deliquescing ♥

  1. #1
    SafaAuditore's Avatar Full Member
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    Cool Deliquescing ♥

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    Back to poetry, but this time, it's Stewartified (my english teacher has affected my poetry in such ways that're unimaginable)
    It's not supposed to be picture poem, BUT when i played with it and messed around it ended up looking really cool and almost like a picture...just use your imagination XD

    It's called Deliquescing which means...something really cool which i already forgot but it was really pretty...
    Enjoy!!
    Copyrighted - don't try to steal it XD
    Copyright © Serena G - 2010
    __________________________________________________ _______________________
    Deliquescing
    I
    Lay
    In my
    Crimson blood,
    Waiting for death,
    Bleeding life,
    My skin
    Dissolves,
    My heart
    Slips,
    My spirit
    Sinks.
    I lift my head,
    There you are,
    Desert Eagle.
    Heart ready,
    Blood retiring,
    Thoughts passing,
    Memories flashing,
    No one will ever know.
    The metal
    It flew,
    It soared,
    It was free,
    Free to kill,
    Mercilessly struck,
    My heart gushed,
    A large hole,
    Inhuman, it was,
    Alive, I wasn’t.
    Darkness,
    Fading,
    Life.
    __________________________________________________ __________________
    Feedback welcome n appreciated =)
    P.S...if this isn't where i belongs..sorry..cause it's the closest thread to poetry O.O all that good stuff you guys used to have is gone =(
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  3. #2
    'Abd-al Latif's Avatar Super Moderator
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥



    Creative, good imagery. But a tad depressing.
    Deliquescing ♥

    And verily for everything that a slave loses there is a substitute, but the one who loses Allah will never find anything to replace Him.”
    [Related by Ibn al-Qayyim in ad-Dâ' wad-Dawâ Fasl 49]


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  4. #3
    S.Belle's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥


    del·i·quesce
    intr.v. del·i·quesced, del·i·quesc·ing, del·i·quesc·es
    1. a. To melt away.
    b. To disappear as if by melting.

    very fitting
    Deliquescing ♥

    "Yesterday is history.
    Tomorrow is a mystery.
    Today is a gift.
    That's why we call it 'The Present'."
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  5. #4
    Maryan0's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥

    I like it. It's very dark.
    Salam
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    siam's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥

    could this also work?

    I think its by Rabbia Al Basri?

    In my soul
    there is a temple, a shrine, a mosque, a church
    where I kneel
    prayer should bring us to an Altar
    where no walls or names exist

    Is there not a religion of love
    where soverignity is illumined nothing
    where ecstasy gets poured into itself and becomes lost

    where the wing is fully alive but has no mind or body

    In my soul
    there is a temple, a shrine, a mosque a church
    that dissolve
    that dissolve in God
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  8. #6
    itsjustme's Avatar Limited Member
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥

    I like, dark, poetry generator? with personal experience?
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  9. #7
    SafaAuditore's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥

    haha thx mila XD
    And of course it's depressing it's war. the dude just got shot O.O
    itjustme - no one could write it from experience unless they writing from the grave lol XD

    Thnx for ur feedback people, more to come =)
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  10. #8
    Cabdullahi's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥

    i might as well give up poetry after reading this

    MashaALLAH
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  11. #9
    Muezzin's Avatar Jewel of IB
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    Re: Deliquescing ♥

    Moving to Creative Writing and Art.
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