My dad is forcing me to be a surgeon.

Assalamu Alaikum

What grade are you in? It seems you are still in high school. To be honest, get through your high school first and then think about what you really want to do. My cousin wanted to be an engineer, had her eyes set on a particular school, and after she started her first semester, she changed everything. When I started school, I had my mind set on Medical school, there was no plan B for me, then I decided I didn't want to spend so much time in school and changed my major a few times actually. One of my best friends hates school, and her parents have pushed her into the medical field..she ended up doing dentistry, but still does not want to do it. The thing is she never could see herself even getting that far in school, she's not that good, but with hard work and dedication, she succeeded mashallah and even if she never works as a dentist, she will always have such a strong foundation.

I honestly think you won't know exactly what you want to do until you get some experience in the university and look at a variety of majors, maybe even shadow some people.

EDIT: I also want to mention that you can also do engineering within the medical field..that way you can both compromise :P

your situaltion made me rscall a book we read in Islamic school when teens, it was called "a devoted son" by anita desiree, maybe sit at his bedside and read it to and with him.

format_quote Originally Posted by Moshy

Not obeying your father would be a sin. You can kindly convince him. If he does not change his mind, then leave it to Allah. Best is to ask Allah for guidance. Only He knows what is best for His servants.

The parent has no right in forcing his son to do certain stuffs that he feels is best, like his career, or his wife, and so on.
His career and wife, and stuff like these, unless the son is choosing something Haram, the parent cannot force them in to something of their choice; it's the son's life and he will decide about it.

There is lot of technology in surgery. Imagine being an orthopedic surgeon and using the latest and greatest ceramic or titanium hip replacements, or imagine being an ophthalmologist and doing micro-vitrectomies and retinotomies with 29 gauge needles and diamond-tipped vitrectors, or imagine being a radiologist and using intra-arterial catheters to clip aneurysms in brain circulation.

You should do what you like but I just wanted to challenge your biased view against medicine and surgery that it is not technological. It is perhaps the most interesting thing you can do with your life if you have the taste for it. Of course my views are biased as I am a doctor.

Dear Faree:

If your father plans to pay for your studies, then unless you obtain a full scholarship, or you are willing to work and study, then you cannot simply ignore your father's wishes. Further, because he is your father, you should honour him. Therefore, let me suggest that you learn to negotiate - it is never to early to learn.

Your father appears to have a lower opinion of engineering than surgery. Perhaps you can start there. Engineering is perhaps the most important profession. I am not stating that because I happen to be an engineer, rather, it is true. Since humans are not perfect, we will all make mistakes. Therefore, one way of measuring importance is by the magnitude of consequences if an error is made.

If a plumber makes a mistake, then you may have a leak.
If a land surveyor makes a mistake, then you may lose or gain some land.
If an accountant makes a mistake, then you may lose or gain some money.
If a lawyer makes a mistake, then you may win or lose your case.
If a doctor makes a mistake, then you can lose a limb or your life.
However, if an engineer makes a mistake, then multitudes may die.

If a structural engineer underestimates the weight of equipment on the roof, the multi-storey building can collapse.
If the mechanical engineer underestimates the shear strength of a bolt, an aeroplane can crash.
If an electrical engineer underestimates the capacity of a fuse, the multi-storey building can be consumed in an electrical fire.
If chemical, agricultural, environmental, transportation, or industrial engineers make mistakes, multitudes can die. Let your father know that engineers are critically important.

If your father is concerned about your future earnings, then let him know that the mediocre will normally struggle, even mediocre surgeons. But there is lots of room at the top for the conscientious professional.

Best regards.

format_quote Originally Posted by Faree

I want to be an engineer but my dad is forcing me to go be an doctor especially surgeon. But I am not interested in medical field I always wanted to be an engineer because I am interested in technology.
He says that if I became a doctor I will get a lot of money, I will enjoy rest of my life, I will be famous, I can go to any country I want if I got a doctor degree.
But I stil don't want to be a doctor I want to enjoy my job. I told him but he doesn't listen. I hate being a doctor.

You can have both worlds...

Be a doctor / engineer. If you like technology appease to your technology and design things to be used in the medical industry. I have a friend who has combined genetics with technology. You can be a biomedical engineer? Get a PhD in biomedical engineering and tell your dad, you are technically a "doctor" XD :P