lol, your logic there is quite interesting to say the least. no of course when someone you love dies you can't mummify them and keep them. my point was about something completely different. that for a living person, you want them part of the time even if you can't have them all the time. so if doctors told me someone who i loved was brain dead and would never speak or react ever again, i would want them in that capacity as opposed to never having them around at all. my original post was about love though, that when you love a (living) person who you can marry according to Islam, and you truly love them, you want them in any capacity even if you cannot have them 100%. isn't this what polygamy is all about? wives sharing the same husband because they would rather have a part of their husband's life rather than not have them at all?
also, you said relationships die but love doesn't. well if love doesn't die, i would say it's rather stupid to say "actually Allah said i COULD have you as a co-wife, but i can't even though yes i do love you" - i mean talk about an oxymoron. it's like saying, yes i love you, but i love my pride more, because i can't bear to share you with someone else, so my solution to that is to completely not have you at all - i think actually any logical person would say that is quite stupid. because by saying no to that you're inflicting a punishment on yourself and the other person who loves you, so in no way is it altruistic to say "sorry all or nothing" when Islam allows otherwise, rather it's quite selfish and a person who does such a thing does indeed have a lot of pride, that OR a severe lack of love, because it's their pride/lack of love that stops them from saying ok i will make a compromise. what else would you call that other than pride and selfishness? if you love someone and you can marry them according to Islam but choose not to, it's your pride and ego that got in the way, nothing else. the rest is all dressed up in lace and flowery, the bit about "relationships die, love doesn't" yeah well to me that's just a claim that it didn't die, obviously that sort of love isn't what i count as love in my books because when you love someone you don't stop wanting them unless it's something Allah made haram. i'm an odd type though so i don't expect others to understand the way i love or think i suppose. i respect your opinions though sister, and i do understand where you are coming from, of course you are entitled to your own opinion just as i am to mine. if i said anything which was rude/hurtful i am sorry, i just have very strong opinions so it seems i am rude sometimes when i am not trying to be.
wsalam