Post anything related to marriage, Muslim couples, quotes and reminders .
“Among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, in order to have tranquility with them and He put love and mercy between your (hearts) : verily in that are signs for those who reflect.” [30:21]
“Marriage is so much more than love and romance. It HAS to be.
A couple struggles together to cope when there is a miscarriage, and the loss of love, dreams, and excitement they had for that child.
A couple struggles together when the bank account is low, hospital bills from a sick child are stacking up, and more work or a higher salary is hard to come by.
A couple struggles together when one of their parents becomes ill, and after years of care, finally returns to our Lord.
A couple struggles together through the tantrums of the toddler years, and the storms of trying to keep a close hold on their kids in the teens and young adult years.
A couple struggles together when facing the loss of their home, or car, or job and how to recreate stability at a time when there seems to be none.
A couple struggles together when one spouse’s iman is low, and their faith is teetering on the edge, while the other strives hard to keep them both at a safe distance away from that same sharp edge and dramatic fall.
Marriage is not just about love and romance. It’s also about fulfilling this ayah:“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find *tranquillity* in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” Quran 30:21
Love and romance are what surrounds the marriage to make ease in hard times, laughter in the midst of stress, passion at the most ironic times.
But it’s depth, the meaning of love, and even romance, should be given so much more depth and value. Hollywood romance doesn’t even come close to this kind of beauty.
Love is worth the struggle, and the struggle is beautiful.”
The Prophet has Stated, "Allah is pleased when a husband plays with his wife, due to this he fixes thawaab (good reward) for them or he establishes halal rizq (lawful sustenance) for them." (Al-Ifsah Ibn Hajr Haithami)
My husband is an Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature, ‘n I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders. Three years of courtship ‘n now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it.
The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restles…sness. I am a sentimental woman ‘n extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship ‘n my feelings, I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, ‘n the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.
“Why?” he asked, shocked. “I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world!” I answered. He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thought with a lighted cigarette at all times.
My feeling of disappointment only increased, here was a man who can’t even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him? ‘n finally he asked me:” What can I do to change your mind?” Somebody said it right, it’s hard to change a person’s personality, ‘n I guess, I have started losing faith in him.
Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered : “Here is the question, if you can answer ‘n convince my heart, I will change my mind, Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, ‘n we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death, will you do it for me?” He said :” I will give you your answer tomorrow….” My hopes just sank by listening to his response.
I woke up the next morning to find him gone, ‘n saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes….
My dear, “I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further..” This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading. “When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, ‘n you cry in front of the screen, I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.
You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to show you the way.
You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, ‘n I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes ‘n stories to cure your boredom.
You always stare at the computer, ‘n that will do nothing good for your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails,’n help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine ‘n the beautiful sand… ‘n tell you the colour of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face…
Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet, ‘n die.. ” My tears fell on the letter, ‘n blurred the ink of his handwriting… ‘n as I continue on reading…
“Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread ‘n fresh milk…
I rush to pull open the door, ‘n saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle ‘n loaf of bread…. Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, ‘n I have decided to leave the flower alone…
That’s life, ‘n love. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away, ‘n one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace ‘n dullness.
Love shows up in all forms, even very small ‘n cheeky forms, it has never been a model, it could be the most dull ‘n boring form.. . flowers, ‘n romantic moments are only used ‘n appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands… ‘n that’s our life… Love, not words win arguments… !
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has Stated, "Allah is pleased when a husband plays with his wife, due to this he fixes thawaab (good reward) for them or he establishes halal rizq (lawful sustenance) for them." (Al-Ifsah Ibn Hajr Haithami)
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