As salaamu alaykum my muslim brothers and sisters.
I don't understand why this subject has become such an issue today,
lots of muslims say they accept polygamy but just not for themselves. is this not a contradiction, coz we supposed to love for our muslim brother / sister what we love for ourselves.
So many sisters, due to male female ratio will not get married, if we don't start promoting and acting on this.
Few of my friends commit polygamy. But before they commit polygamy, no one of them who rant "I want polygamy! .... I want polygamy!".
Different than my wife relative who ranted "I want polygamy!". But until his wife passed away more than 15 years later he still in monogamy because ...... no woman was willing to be his second wife.
Poor dude. I'm almost at 15 yrs, couple more to go, lol.
afaik, the purpose of polygamy is to lower the gaze, but also to protect women. I doubt many can be just to more than 1 wife nowadays.
I've nothing against polygamy, as expected. but yeah. Polygamy, only if you can be just.
And Allah knows best.
It's so funny, every Muslim today wants justice for the whole ummah, and we scared about being just among more than one wife. I suppose that's y we are where we are.
oh ALLAH, please grant us, the ummah of Habibullah (saw) victory.
When u got one wife, she gona fight with u,
When u got 2, they gona fight for you, lol
A man who say two women fight for him is pleasant, actually is a man who has not ever experience it. In reality they would not fight for you, but fight you, and you would get headache when you face their jealousy.
I learn it from my experience before I got married. I was ever in that situation, and that made me realize that I would not able to handle marriage with more than one wife.
Yes, I was known as good husband in my marriage with my late wife who passed away in 2013. People praised me because I was very loyal to my late wife. But to be honest, the cause why I could be the good husband was my guilty feeling. I have hurt few women who loved me before. And I didn't want to do it again. I never forget their jealousy, their cry. And it always make me feel guilty.
Bro, have you ever thinking about your wife feeling?.
A man who say two women fight for him is pleasant, actually is a man who has not ever experience it. In reality they would not fight for you, but fight you, and you would get headache when you face their jealousy.
I learn it from my experience before I got married. I was ever in that situation, and that made me realize that I would not able to handle marriage with more than one wife.
Yes, I was known as good husband in my marriage with my late wife who passed away in 2013. People praised me because I was very loyal to my late wife. But to be honest, the cause why I could be the good husband was my guilty feeling. I have hurt few women who loved me before. And I didn't want to do it again. I never forget their jealousy, their cry. And it always make me feel guilty.
Bro, have you ever thinking about your wife feeling?.
My wife encourages me, she's the one that calls me a coward lol.
Their is a divorced orphan in the city I stay in, possibility of nikah, wife's aquaintance
A man who say two women fight for him is pleasant, actually is a man who has not ever experience it. In reality they would not fight for you, but fight you, and you would get headache when you face their jealousy.
I learn it from my experience before I got married. I was ever in that situation, and that made me realize that I would not able to handle marriage with more than one wife.
Yes, I was known as good husband in my marriage with my late wife who passed away in 2013. People praised me because I was very loyal to my late wife. But to be honest, the cause why I could be the good husband was my guilty feeling. I have hurt few women who loved me before. And I didn't want to do it again. I never forget their jealousy, their cry. And it always make me feel guilty.
Bro, have you ever thinking about your wife feeling?.
It's so funny, every Muslim today wants justice for the whole ummah, and we scared about being just among more than one wife. I suppose that's y we are where we are.
oh ALLAH, please grant us, the ummah of Habibullah (saw) victory.
bro, if you can do it, go for it.
Try to do some research on polygamy. Purify your intentions, etc.
(mildly) It is true that Allah and His Prophet have permitted marrying more than one wife, though with certainprovisos... but please realize that if you take a second wife, unless both women are comfortable with this, you are likely to cause everyone a lot of grief- including yourself...andyourchildren.
If both women are ok with this, then you could have two houses or apartments next to one another and see all your loved ones every day in a generally peaceful atmosphere (though if you are living in a country that strongly disapproves of polygyny, your children will likely feel this pressure). Otherwise, you will likely see your children less, have a lot of strife in your homes (and if you think your children will not pick up on their mothers' unhappiness... think again. Kids have radar for any kind of problems) and have a lot stress about money issues.
(mildly) It is normal that you have sexual desires. So do most people (including your wife, you know... and if she feels unloved and lacking in company...you may put your marriage in peril). And it is common that when people get a little older and more bound by responsibilities, they may feel an urge to try to hold onto carefree youth a little longer. But if you are just feeling a shallow urge... is it really wise to stir up a hornets nest? If you take a second wife, after your honeymoon period, you are looking at more responsibilities. More conflict. More stress. Less time for yourself, less time for your children, less time for your wives.
(mildly) If you want to marry again for the sake of Allah, marrying someone who is in need (older, less attractive, financially in a difficult place, with kids who need a father figure, or other difficulty...), and with the full understanding of the implications of this marriage, then this is something that you could perhaps explore (and if this is the case, your wives are more likely to get along, incidentally). You are right, Allah SWT has Permitted taking up to 4 women in marriage. And the Prophet SAWS certainly helped women in this way through marriage. But there are limitations. And depending on where you live, there may be more limitations than others. I would advise that you read up on fatawa from your country. And that you take legal and financial advice for this step before you ever even broach it with your wife. (smile) And of course, that you pray sincerely for Guidance.
May Allah, the Grateful, Help us to see the good He has Gifted us with.
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If you can treat each wife equally, go ahead. But prepare for double the headachesabumuslim82
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