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It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

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    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

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    I have been born with Di George syndrom, and this syndrom disables me from fasting and from praying normal like every Muslim is doing(I mean, with prostration).

    And the doctors had told me and advised me that "if I get married and plan to have children, then for sure your future biological children will inherit your syndrom and they will get the same suffering as you had. So it is advisable not to have children."

    My Christian mother told me that extremely rare children are born with one of their parent having syndrom or disease and they are born 100%healthy.

    What should I do? Should I implement the advise given by doctors? Am I really committing disbelief by doing this? I'm really scared.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    Assalamu Alaikum

    You are too young to be thinking about marriage right now. You also should pray (with a chair) so that you can be more closer to Allah. Your worries will be much less.
    Both the doctors and your mother is right about the syndrome. There's a very low chance for your children to have this syndrome as well, but they will still inherit the genes just like any other syndrome or genetic defect. The genes will always be passed down, but this does not mean that they will have the syndrome or have the same complications as you. Sometimes healthy people with no history of illness will have ill children. Everything is in Allah's hands and we have to accept it as a trial in this life.
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    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    Assalamu Alaikum

    You are too young to be thinking about marriage right now. You also should pray (with a chair) so that you can be more closer to Allah. Your worries will be much less.
    Both the doctors and your mother is right about the syndrome. There's a very low chance for your children to have this syndrome as well, but they will still inherit the genes just like any other syndrome or genetic defect. The genes will always be passed down, but this does not mean that they will have the syndrome or have the same complications as you. Sometimes healthy people with no history of illness will have ill children. Everything is in Allah's hands and we have to accept it as a trial in this life.
    Then thats why did the Prophet advised the youngsters to get married and also Quran encourages us to have children?
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Nitro Zeus View Post
    Then thats why did the Prophet advised the youngsters to get married and also Quran encourages us to have children?
    During the time of the prophet pbuh the youngsters were very mature in mind. Also it is better to get married young because women are more fertile at a younger age which means muslims can have bigger families. The ummah will increase with more muslims if they have more children. Also there is a lot of fitnah and to prevent fitnah it helps to be married. Married couples support each other. It is like having a best friend with you for your entire life that is of the opposite gender who will also take care of you and love you. But being married has a lot of responsibilities too and one should not be unjust and marry someone if he cannot take care of her or if illness prevents him from doing his husband duties. So it is only a sunnah, but not a mandatory thing.
    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    Assalamu Alaikum

    You are too young to be thinking about marriage right now. You also should pray (with a chair) so that you can be more closer to Allah. Your worries will be much less.
    Both the doctors and your mother is right about the syndrome. There's a very low chance for your children to have this syndrome as well, but they will still inherit the genes just like any other syndrome or genetic defect. The genes will always be passed down, but this does not mean that they will have the syndrome or have the same complications as you. Sometimes healthy people with no history of illness will have ill children. Everything is in Allah's hands and we have to accept it as a trial in this life.
    hopefuly I will get married when I will have a great job. Now, I'm really confused what to do in future. My point is: I want to prepare the necessary knowledge for my future.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    During the time of the prophet pbuh the youngsters were very mature in mind. Also it is better to get married young because women are more fertile at a younger age which means muslims can have bigger families. The ummah will increase with more muslims if they have more children. Also there is a lot of fitnah and to prevent fitnah it helps to be married. Married couples support each other. It is like having a best friend with you for your entire life that is of the opposite gender who will also take care of you and love you. But being married has a lot of responsibilities too and one should not be unjust and marry someone if he cannot take care of her or if illness prevents him from doing his husband duties. So it is only a sunnah, but not a mandatory thing.
    How can I get married if I dont make first a girlfriend? Bexause, in my opinion, a man cannot get married simply by asking "will you marry me?" the woman would feel even embarress or will have strange feelings and probably will even reject him, because she does not know anything about him. Although, Europe where I live, people look the Islamic wat of getting married is weird, so I dont like to look weird. I'm not trying to speak about Islam, please dont get me wrong. I am saying rhat, they dont know and they cant understand the way which Muslims get married. I mean, if I want to marry someone from Europe or from United States, how can I do this? How can I do in such that no one will look at me as a weird person?
    Last edited by Nitro Zeus; 01-17-2019 at 11:46 AM.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Nitro Zeus View Post
    How can I get married if I dont make first a girlfriend? Bexause, in my opinion, a man cannot get married simply by asking "will you marry me?" the woman would feel even embarress or will have strange feelings and probably will even reject him, because she does not know anything about him. Although, Europe where I live, people look the Islamic wat of getting married is weird, so I dont like to look weird. I'm not trying to speak about Islam, please dont get me wrong. I am saying rhat, they dont know and they cant understand the way which Muslims get married. I mean, if I want to marry someone from Europe or from United States, how can I do this? How can I do in such that no one will look at me as a weird person?
    don't think too much for future. Allah does what is best for us. Study and then Job should be on priority.
    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    Allah (swt) knows best
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by azc View Post
    don't think too much for future. Allah does what is best for us. Study and then Job should be on priority.
    Ok, i'm so curious and I have a strong desire of wanting to knowing about my future. Hopefully I will pass this year in final exam in first session.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Nitro Zeus View Post
    Ok, i'm so curious and I have a strong desire of wanting to knowing about my future. Hopefully I will pass this year in final exam in first session.
    Hope you pass in your final exam. I am sure inshaAllah you will meet your life partner when you are matured for taking responsibilities of a husband.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Nitro Zeus View Post
    How can I get married if I dont make first a girlfriend? Bexause, in my opinion, a man cannot get married simply by asking "will you marry me?" the woman would feel even embarress or will have strange feelings and probably will even reject him, because she does not know anything about him. Although, Europe where I live, people look the Islamic wat of getting married is weird, so I dont like to look weird. I'm not trying to speak about Islam, please dont get me wrong. I am saying rhat, they dont know and they cant understand the way which Muslims get married. I mean, if I want to marry someone from Europe or from United States, how can I do this? How can I do in such that no one will look at me as a weird person?
    When the time comes, you will know how. It does not matter where the person is from. And it can happen. You do not need to be boyfriend and girlfriend, you must be mature which is what marriage is about.
    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    D e a t h

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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    When the time comes, you will know how. It does not matter where the person is from. And it can happen. You do not need to be boyfriend and girlfriend, you must be mature which is what marriage is about.
    So the knowledge of getting married will come to me naturally without noticing when the time has come?
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Nitro Zeus View Post
    So the knowledge of getting married will come to me naturally without noticing when the time has come?
    Yes of course.
    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    Yes of course.
    Ok, then I will have patient. I'm feeling encouraged now of having patient.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by *charisma* View Post
    When the time comes, you will know how. It does not matter where the person is from. And it can happen. You do not need to be boyfriend and girlfriend, you must be mature which is what marriage is about.
    format_quote Originally Posted by Nitro Zeus View Post
    How can I get married if I dont make first a girlfriend? Bexause, in my opinion, a man cannot get married simply by asking "will you marry me?" the woman would feel even embarress or will have strange feelings and probably will even reject him, because she does not know anything about him. Although, Europe where I live, people look the Islamic wat of getting married is weird, so I dont like to look weird. I'm not trying to speak about Islam, please dont get me wrong. I am saying rhat, they dont know and they cant understand the way which Muslims get married. I mean, if I want to marry someone from Europe or from United States, how can I do this? How can I do in such that no one will look at me as a weird person?
    You do not need to be boyfriend and girlfriend, you must be mature which is what marriage is about
    It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    Do not make the mistake of even going near haram relationship. You will save a lot of heart ache. Allah puts barakah and blessings in marriage not premarital relations. Shaitan is present in them and can only lead you to do evil things. Simple wya is marry a woman based on her character and deen. If you see a woman you like, have a friend approach her for her wali number, or do it through imam, or at a mosque, or straight from the parents. It's more mature and responsible and respectful way because you are telling the family you respect them and want to marry their daughter and not treat them as disposable and have fun with them and throw them away when your bored. Haram relationships lead to many people being abused and used. Some people never recover from that pain. Those who put others in that situation will be held accountable. Please tell me if right. Allah knows best

    - - - Updated - - -

    Besides if you do not want anyone to use your sister, mother, or daughter then why should you do that to someone else?
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Studentofdeed View Post
    Do not make the mistake of even going near haram relationship. You will save a lot of heart ache. Allah puts barakah and blessings in marriage not premarital relations. Shaitan is present in them and can only lead you to do evil things. Simple wya is marry a woman based on her character and deen. If you see a woman you like, have a friend approach her for her wali number, or do it through imam, or at a mosque, or straight from the parents. It's more mature and responsible and respectful way because you are telling the family you respect them and want to marry their daughter and not treat them as disposable and have fun with them and throw them away when your bored. Haram relationships lead to many people being abused and used. Some people never recover from that pain. Those who put others in that situation will be held accountable. Please tell me if right. Allah knows best

    - - - Updated - - -

    Besides if you do not want anyone to use your sister, mother, or daughter then why should you do that to someone else?
    Huh? From where to where this idea came to you? What do you mean by "use..."?? My sister can marry only a Muslim, but not a non Muslim because thats what Quran tells. A mother can marry someone if she has divorced her previous husband, that is quit logic. But when both of them are together and one of them is dating someone else, that could be like cheating your spouse. Anyway, I dont like to see a family who is divorced, I like when they are united in first and they continue be united.

    A single person will always be easy to be beaten up, but if the person has joined a group, then he will become hard to be ebaten up.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    Salam

    You should get married to a woman that will take care of you

    I have a weird Huntington disorder that doesn't allow me to do wudu...
    And I can't even do any salah execpt in my heart

    When I married with a disability I lost the one I loved as my husband to a divorce.....

    Marriage has kids involved babies
    Which I couldn't take care of
    But I really loved my husband.....
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Desert View Post
    Salam

    You should get married to a woman that will take care of you

    I have a weird Huntington disorder that doesn't allow me to do wudu...
    And I can't even do any salah execpt in my heart

    When I married with a disability I lost the one I loved as my husband to a divorce.....

    Marriage has kids involved babies
    Which I couldn't take care of
    But I really loved my husband.....
    You could ask someone to do ablution for you?

    the prayer is invalid if it is done without ablution - Quran says.

    The Prophet had taught Muslim nation ways of praying if you are disabled. You may see a picture for this on internet.

    The power of music must be used wisely to the point where you dont sin. Why do you think God granted to us this kind of power? Because it is a form of a test, and if we used to mislead people the punishment of God awaits us, and if we used it in good ways then. we will be rewarded.

    God told Adam: "if you do bad I will Punish you, and if you do good, I will reward you".

    Quran says: "Everything must be done with an intention, for one who do something with intention of doing good, then he will be rewarded". This what Quran teaches, and it is very clear.
    Last edited by Nitro Zeus; 01-20-2019 at 10:56 AM.
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    Re: It is ok if I dont get married for serious medical problems?

    Assalamu alaykum
    Marriage and having children are combined in natural way but they do not need to both happen. I mean, you can get married and not have children or sponsor an orphan.
    You just have to find a woman who will agree to this out of love for Allah. There are women who for their own reason can not have kids or do not want kids. There are divorcees who already have kids and do not want or need more...Marriage and children do not HAVE to be combined. YES it is sunnah. But it doesn't make you evil or a sinner or doom you to hell if you do not have kids
    TAke it easy on yourself and think positive. You are still young and will find someone to marry im sure. there are billions of women in the world. If every single one had a kid then this world would explode. lol
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